Question About Graduation Party Situation

beach-mom · ‎03-09-2010

DD asked my advice, and I thought I'd ask yours.

She has a single friend in her 30's. Her older sister was killed in a car accident and this lady was awarded full custody of her niece and 2 nephews, who were young at the time, when she was barely in her 20's. So she has raised them, and is still raising her nephews. .

Her niece is graduating from high school, and DD's friend has invited all of HER friends to a huge party she is giving. DD has met her friend's niece, but doesn't really know her.

She doesn't want to go without a gift. I agreed. One of MY friends said she doesn't have to take a gift if she doesn't really know the girl, because she is basically going to a party given by her friend.

I think it's really nice she invited DD and her other friends, and I think DD could take a card with a small cash gift inside.

What do you all think?

sunshine45 · ‎03-09-2010

i think a small gift of cash OR a gift card is totally appropriate for someone you dont know very well. its a time for celebration. i would not go without a gift.

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"The world is a dangerous place, not because of those who do evil, but because of those who look on and do nothing." - Albert Einstein

drizzellla · ‎03-14-2010

@beach-mom I completely agree with you.

It is a party to celebrate the niece graduating. So I think a card and money gift would be welcome by the niece. And your daughter's friend will appreciate that the niece received it.

Your daughter's friend will be paying for the party and all the work involved in having the event. So your daughter's friend will be happy to see everyone enjoying the get together.

AZfem · ‎04-13-2016

Cash, gift card or ask her friend what niece likes or might want. When you don't know someone well, I always believe in asking those closest for suggestions.

roeroe1005 · ‎03-13-2010

I'm not a mom, but I am an aunt and great aunt.

My opinion - doesn't matter if your DD knows this young lady really well or would pass her on the street without a glance. Considering the circumstances, I believe your DD should give her a card and a gift. Cash is always good.

Your DD's friend must be one special person to raise these children under such sad circumstances. Much luck & success to this young lady.

lynnie61 · ‎04-28-2010

I would not go without taking a gift. Her friend is throwing the niece a party, I thiink she is proud of her. If nothing else, give it to make her friend feel good too.

Q-Checker · ‎05-09-2010

Of course, bring a gift. Unless it is a financial burden, the cash gift should be of a respectable size. I do not understand the emphasis on "small" unless it is a financial burden. I think it is wonderful that this young woman raised the graduate and I would want to celebrate that joy with them, if possible, in some significant way.

VanSleepy · ‎10-05-2010

I agree that it doesn't matter how well your daughter knows the girl. She has accepted an invitation to a party honoring her. Yes, bring a gift.

panda1234 · ‎04-27-2015

@beach-mom I think a $50 Amazon gift card would be very nice and appreciated

OneHappyHiker · ‎01-04-2011

@beach-mom I love that your daughter asked your opinion and you asked here; many thoughtful people will give you their best advice! I also love that a young lady barely in her 20's took on the daunting responsibility of raising her sister's children! I tell you, we often think about those things when making out our wills, but rarely hear of anything like that happening. I give such credit to your daughter's friend for not only raising these nephews and niece, but also that she has kept up with HER friends and is treating HER friends to a fun celebration as well! So she gets to enjoy blending her niece's friends and her friends! It will be super fun!

Now to your question... I would definitely advise bringing cash or a gift card. I would make it the amount of something you both know will be greatly appreciated and more importantly, needed/used. I would also bring something for your daughter's friend who is giving the party. She knows her and would know what to bring as a hostess gift. It's a gift of appreciation as we usually do for the hostess.

I always like to think it's not about if I should or shouldn't bring a gift to any event, to me it's about the smile of the recipient and them knowing I appreciate their effort in putting on whatever event it is. Tell your daughter to have a great time! Her friend helped that young lady make it through high school after such a devastating situation