Mom to Mom

[Magga1234]

I have a 5 year old granddaugther who basically ignores me when I come to visit or when i meet see her at a family gathering. If time allows, I usually manage to win her over and we have fun together. She is a smart, happy little girl, an only child just out of preschool and soon to be in kindergarten. My daughter and soninlaw have told her that she is being unkind and that her behaviour is unacceptable but not much changes.  Are they being to easy on her or am I being to sensitive? I appreciate your thoughts...Thanks...  

[mom2four0418]

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@Magga1234 wrote:

I have a 5 year old granddaugther who basically ignores me when I come to visit or when i meet see her at a family gathering. If time allows, I usually manage to win her over and we have fun together. She is a smart, happy little girl, an only child just out of preschool and soon to be in kindergarten. My daughter and soninlaw have told her that she is being unkind and that her behaviour is unacceptable but not much changes.  Are they being to easy on her or am I being to sensitive? I appreciate your thoughts...Thanks...  

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What else would you like them to say or do to her?

[RetRN]

The parents need to do a better job. You don't allow your child to ignore people who are friends or family. 

[Leggett28]

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@mom2four0418 wrote:

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@Magga1234 wrote:

I have a 5 year old granddaugther who basically ignores me when I come to visit or when i meet see her at a family gathering. If time allows, I usually manage to win her over and we have fun together. She is a smart, happy little girl, an only child just out of preschool and soon to be in kindergarten. My daughter and soninlaw have told her that she is being unkind and that her behaviour is unacceptable but not much changes.  Are they being to easy on her or am I being to sensitive? I appreciate your thoughts...Thanks...  

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What else would you like them to say or do to her?

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Well you were a big help.

[blackhole99]

I think she's just too immature to be held responsible for her not wanting to socialize with you. I think if her parents force it she will just double down and be even more petulant. Give her some time and space and I bet she will come around.

[GCR18]

Can you spend more 1:1 time with her?  Take her out for an ice cream or to the park.  If she's always been this way, it's time to turn it around.  If it's a new behavior, can you remember what was happening at the time.  It sounds like the parents agree with you.  I think though you should break the ice and find more opportunities to be with her alone.

[alicedee]

I’m a bit confused about what you mean about her “ignoring” you.

Does she not respond when you say hello, stiffen up when you hug her, not answer your questions?  

What is it that you want her to do?  Have you verbalized that to her?

How often do you see her?   Maybe as an only child she is uncomfortable in situations with gatherings bigger than what she is used to?

[D Kay]

What can they do?  Force her to act a certain way?  The fact that she has already been reprimanded probably makes her resentful.  I think the whole thing will blow over.  She's only 5.

[CAcableGirl2]

@Magga1234   Don't give up, she is only 5 years old and has already been reprimanded about her behavior, which now may cause her to be hesitant to be overly engaged with you.

As she gets older, she will come around.  Plan some fun days for her and before too long, she'll be begging to spend time with her Grandmother. 

Maybe the next time you are around her, you can have a casual family or group picture taken (while she is having fun) and her parents can hang it in her room so she can remember the fun she had with her family (and Grandma). 

Just a suggestion....If she loves Minnie Mouse (like mine does), have them put the picture in some sort of Minnie Mouse picture frame so she'll look at it often.  

[Skyegirl21]

It’s hard, I get it.  My son at first was frightened of my sweet, kind MIL. But she won him over! Try to engage her with different things. Ya never know... something might light her up! If not dolls, try LEGO’s, animals, crafts, you get it.  Don’t push too hard about her behavior, some people are just introverts.