Kitchen

[Boehm Collector]

Hi house cat,

in the other thread you wrote: My grandfathers were both artisans in Italy, arrived here just in time for the Depression to derail them. Their brothers who stayed in Italy did just as well as my grandfathers did here in America. Those years were devastating to everyone.

I am not 100% sure ... and unfortunately there isn't anyone left I can ask... But I think my Dad's family came to this county after the Depression. They did have it rough though. In Italy, my paternal grandfather owned a farm. Here my grandfather worked in the coal mines in PA. They could not afford to bring everyone to the USA so some of the children, including my Dad, were left with family members until my grandparents could afford to send for them. Eventually they moved to Brooklyn and started their clothing manufacturing business. From Brooklyn they ended up in Long Island. But my Dad was one of the holdouts. He eventually went on to study medicine in Italy so didn't come here until he was finished and did his internship and residency here. But before he came to the USA permanently he married Mom and brought her to live in the US with his family while he returned to Italy to complete his studies. In any event, I have always loved Italy... but for some reason did not fully appreciate it until I returned three years ago with my DH and my brother & his family after both Mom and Dad had passed away. That was such an emotional trip for me. I reminisced about the time I spent there with my parents..... and did an awful lot of crying. I am lucky to still have my aunt (Mom's sister) and cousins there. We have gotten even closer than we were when Mom was alive. My DH and I are hoping to go back some time this year.

Both sets of grandparents were from the same area in Italy. So both grandmothers had very similar cooking styles. Both were excellent cooks. I do not enjoy cooking but I grew up with home made meals so I am carrying on the tradition. No canned foods in my house. I never cooked until after I got married. Just before my wedding I started asking Mom for her recipes and writing them down. But it would drive me insane when she would tell me "a little bit of that and a little bit of this". I wanted exact measurements but she couldn't give them to me. LOL. Now after so many years of cooking, I have no trouble with "a little bit of that and a little bit of this". It made me feel so good when Mom would tell me that I was a good cook... she lived with my DH and I during the last year of her life because she could no longer live alone. And now when I make some of Mom's more complicated dishes for the holidays, my brother always compliments me. Not bad for someone who hates to cook.

My DH is not Italian but he loves my cooking. His mother's cooking was really, really bland (because his Dad would only eat bland food) so I guess he is enjoying food that is more flavorful.

Regards, Maria

[Boehm Collector]

Hi house cat ... are you there??

[house cat]

Yes. Hi, BC

Similar story here. My dh is not Italian either. He enjoys some Italian dishes, but like me, he's not a huge fan of tomato based recipes. His roots are in KY/WV. I was fascinated with the dishes his mom would cook and she taught me more about cooking than my own mom did. My mom was not an enthusiastic cook. She cooked mostly on autopilot. The handful of things she knew well, she cooked well, but she didn't enjoy it and didn't have much variety.

I didn't learn how to make gravy until I started cooking with MIL. In our house, gravy was tomato sauce with meat. On the rare instance we used chicken gravy or turkey gravy, it came from a can. My mom had no idea you could actually make it from scratch.

I keep a menu calendar to help me shop and stay organized. I usually make something Italian on Wednesdays, but rarely any other time. We grew up with the commercial that said, "Wednesday is Prince spaghetti day", so we think it's funny that Wednesday is our Italian night… yep, corny, but so are we.

The story is that my maternal grandma was an excellent cook, but she died a month before I arrived, so I never had the pleasure of meeting her or cooking with her.

My paternal grandma was some kind of a matriarchal queen. She sat and was catered to while her sister and five daughters did all the cooking. Again, not a lot of creativity on that side either. When my dad retired more than 30 years ago, he took over the cooking at our house and he loved it. He says that I'm a much better cook than he ever was, but he matches me in enthusiasm. Unfortunately, at 90, he can't stand or see well enough to cook anymore. When I cook there I always give him tasks to do at the table and he still loves it.

I was cooking for mom and dad for a year until we got them on the meals on wheels program. Now I only cook for them on weekends. I occasionally make something my mom used to make, but mostly I cook American style casseroles, because they are easy to schlepp over there. My mom can't understand them. Every time I bring one, which is very often, she says, "I don't understand why all the food is in one dish"… She doesn't like eating anything healthy and would skip meals for ice cream or cupcakes if given the opportunity. Her standard line is, "Italians never ate that, so I didn't get used to it." Mind you, she was born here in the U.S. 89 years ago.. you would think she would have gotten used to American food by now.

BTW, since I'm already late getting ready for work, lol - my paternal grandpa was an airplane mechanic. He worked with Charles Lindbergh in the early years. My maternal grandpa was an artisan who made violin strings (sheep gut). He brought the art and the machines from Italy with him in 1911. He made strings for the NY Phil and many other famous people. When the depression hit, he had to close the company and take a job building roads in NYC. His BIL, who coincidentally had the same last name, picked it up in the 1940s and made a billion dollar business out of it. They are currently one of the biggest names in guitar strings in the world. That's just one of many examples of how my family JUST MISSED being rich.