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Honored Contributor
Posts: 9,836
Registered: ‎03-09-2010

I've turned into the Thanksgiving Day Grinch...

I started getting questions from my kids about Thanksgiving.  Each has at least one other set of parents or family that wants them for the holiday. 

 

I realized that it was going to wind up one of those gatherings where everyone would be either eating and running, or showing up late.

 

I politely told them all to count me out.  I live near them and see them often. I'm not the least bit insulted if they spend the day somewhere else... what would bother me is doing all that work and having to fit my dinner in around everyone else's time table. 

 

I'm sure I sound callous, but I do enough cooking for everyone ... vegetarian... gluten free.... who doesn't like this and who doesn't like that.... not hungy, just ate at last party... can't have dessert cause I'm eating it at next party.... cranky grandbaby getting dragged around with no nap... and so on.  

 

I don't know what happened to what used to be a relaxing holiday.

 

Signed,

Thanksgiving Grinch

 

 

~ house cat ~
Honored Contributor
Posts: 14,887
Registered: ‎05-23-2015

Re: I've turned into the Thanksgiving Day Grinch...

You are not a grinch, you sound like a reasonable woman. 

" You are entitled to your opinion. But you are not entitled to your own facts."
Daniel Patrick Moynihan
Respected Contributor
Posts: 2,482
Registered: ‎12-27-2010

Re: I've turned into the Thanksgiving Day Grinch...

[ Edited ]

Perhaps one of your kids will smarten up and invite their great mom to join them at someones house....then no cookin or cleaning for you and you are with family. What are they waiting for?

Honored Contributor
Posts: 9,805
Registered: ‎03-26-2010

Re: I've turned into the Thanksgiving Day Grinch...

I hear you, @house_cat , and understand.  Life gets complicated when our kids become adults, marry, have children, etc.  Holidays are more stress and less fun.  We have tried doing every other year.....one Thanksgiving...our family time....next year in-law time.  Same with Christmas...it doesn't always work...sometimes we can't all get together.  Or we have to pick another date to celebrate.  I would not like the stop in...hurry out...two meals in a day...crazy.  We have also done ....brunch here and they head somewhere else for dinner.

 

Good luck working it out.  You are not alone.

Respected Contributor
Posts: 2,099
Registered: ‎03-10-2010

Re: I've turned into the Thanksgiving Day Grinch...

I think I'd feel the same way as you do.  Just think... you're saving yourself a TON of work.  Enjoy your stress-free Thanksgiving!  ❤

ETERNITY: your choice... smoking or non smoking!
Valued Contributor
Posts: 719
Registered: ‎06-02-2023

Re: I've turned into the Thanksgiving Day Grinch...

[ Edited ]

I totally understand and see your point. It's really a lot of work, especially as we get older. And many times it feels like no one really appreciates the effort, time, and expense that goes into it anyway. You're not being callous. You've made a well informed decision and don't you look back. We have to be realistic about holidays and what they do and do not entail. 

Honored Contributor
Posts: 14,482
Registered: ‎03-09-2010

Re: I've turned into the Thanksgiving Day Grinch...

@house_cat,

I call that being a wise woman.

After all everyday can be a celebration when you are together with family or friendsHeart

"If you walk the footsteps of a stranger, you'll learn things you never knew. Can you sing with all the voices of the mountains? can you paint with all the colors of the wind?"
Honored Contributor
Posts: 32,280
Registered: ‎03-10-2010

Re: I've turned into the Thanksgiving Day Grinch...

@house_cat You are probably saving your kids a ton of grief trying to sort everything out.  I applaud you and think you are the greatest for not making an issue out of it!

 

I am sure they will miss being there and you will also, but in the scope of life, it's not something to stress about!  Relax and enjoy a day off!Woman Very Happy

Trusted Contributor
Posts: 1,876
Registered: ‎03-10-2010

Re: I've turned into the Thanksgiving Day Grinch...

@house_cat   You're not a grinch, and I totally understand where you are coming from. 

 

I went through this several years ago.  It felt like I was running a restaurant trying to accommodate everyone's menu preferences, their availability for the day, and what time dinner should be served.  It was just too much.

 

So I finally told them that I had earned my wings with hosting Thanksgiving dinner, that Mom's kitchen is permanently closed for that holiday, and that I was passing the baton on to them.  At first I think they were taken aback by my proclamation!  But they started to rotate who would host each year, and they quickly learned how much work it is.  

 

Don't feel guilty about your decision.  It sounds like you "earned your wings", too!  🙂

 

 

 

Trusted Contributor
Posts: 1,576
Registered: ‎01-15-2017

Re: I've turned into the Thanksgiving Day Grinch...

@house_cat  Don't feel bad, this year I'm going to be the real Grinch! I already said I'm not having Christmas dinner at my house this year. I did Christmas for 25years, had a break for one year, did it two more years and this year someone else can do it. Last year I had 25 people.

   It's really time for the younger generation to take over, but no one has a big enough house. That's why I always end up being the hostess. Don't get me wrong, everyone brings something, but nobody comes over to help me clean or get the house ready. Usually my husband is a big help, but last year he worked right up until Christmas day. So it was all on me. Way too much work! This year he's retiring the beginning of December, but I still don't want to do it. I guess we'll see how it goes.🎄