Reply
Honored Contributor
Posts: 9,874
Registered: ‎03-09-2010

I suddenly understand why older people lose interest in cooking.

My husband has a number of health challenges, including chronic pain. Those issues, along with all the medications he's taking, have caused him to lose interest in food.  I've always enjoyed and taken pride in cooking lovely nutritious dinners, but lately I'm losing my enthusiasm for it.  It pains me to spend 2 or more hours in the kitchen preparing a wholesome homecooked dinner, only to have him take a few bites and push his plate aside. Sometimes I feel like I'm cooking for a toddler again.

 

This week I've added frozen pot pies, frozen mac and cheese and a couple of other shortcuts to our menu.  I guess this is why so many older folks say they don't cook anymore.  

 

I guess it's time for me to rethink some old habits.  

Can anyone else speak to this?

 

~ house cat ~
Honored Contributor
Posts: 14,133
Registered: ‎01-02-2011

Re: I suddenly understand why older people lose interest in cooking.

Would it work to still cook your healthy meals but then freeze smaller portions?  

Valued Contributor
Posts: 738
Registered: ‎03-10-2010

Re: I suddenly understand why older people lose interest in cooking.

[ Edited ]

@house_cat  My experience is almost identical to yours.  My husband has many health issues, including chronic pain, and we both have lost our zest for food like we used to have.  Also, one of my dear friends with whom I enjoyed swapping recipes, passed away.  That too lessened my interest in food and cooking.  We rarely go out to eat, but I do find my meals and portions are much smaller and simpler. I think I read that our taste buds change too---become less discerning.  I don't buy frozen dinners often, but certainly many a night soup and sandwich will work just fine!

 

KK

 

PS  We like leftovers too--so I will make spaghetti, meatloaf, a casserole etc.and have it for a couple evening meals during the week.

Honored Contributor
Posts: 9,874
Registered: ‎03-09-2010

Re: I suddenly understand why older people lose interest in cooking.


@tansy wrote:

Would it work to still cook your healthy meals but then freeze smaller portions?  


 

@tansy

@Karlakaye

 

I do that with some dinners, but I have only one freezer, so space is an issue.

 

He's always appreciative and I completely understand that he's not trying to be difficult.  Still, I find myself resenting all the work I've put in, considering his lack of enthusiasm.  I don't like feeling that way.

~ house cat ~
Valued Contributor
Posts: 965
Registered: ‎11-25-2014

Re: I suddenly understand why older people lose interest in cooking.

I don't have a husband anymore, but my sister and I live together and we both have different likes when it comes to food. Since I do the cooking, I make what I like in a larger quantity, and freeze it in 1 cup incrememnts. My sister doesn't like left overs, si I cook for her each day and take out what I froze for myself.

Your situation is different than mine, your husband for medical reasons doesn't want to eat. 

Make something he may like and freeze it in smaller portions, that way there is very little waste.

I believe it may help to not have any expectations, that he's going to like or eat what you offer.

Cook for yourself and offer him a small bit.

 

I think you're doing an amazing job in caring for him.

Honored Contributor
Posts: 16,138
Registered: ‎03-10-2010

Re: I suddenly understand why older people lose interest in cooking.

Yes ,very true when my husband had cancer , he ate less and less, until he no longer ate at all,  let him eat what ever he wants is my advice.

When you lose some one you L~O~V~E, that Memory of them, becomes a TREASURE.
Honored Contributor
Posts: 12,295
Registered: ‎03-27-2010

Re: I suddenly understand why older people lose interest in cooking.

[ Edited ]

@house_cat  Make meals that please you, the kind of meals you would choose to eat.  Then make enough for your husband also.  If you don't feel like spending time, make quick and easy meals that you would enjoy. Take some time for yourself and explore strategies that will assist you to live with kindness throughout another's struggle.   Living with someone who is in chronic pain is challenging and the meds/pain can alter a person.  I understand your struggle and wish you much happiness and peace.  I respect your concern and compassion.

Honored Contributor
Posts: 14,133
Registered: ‎01-02-2011

Re: I suddenly understand why older people lose interest in cooking.

[ Edited ]

@house_cat, I found this blog post by Ronni Bennet (Time Goes By) interesting the other day.  I might give the protein drink she mentions a try.  It may not help you much on a practical level but you’ll know you are not alone.  

 

***

Some medical professionals call the loss of appetite in old people the “anorexia of ageing.”

Up until a year ago, if anyone had told me I would one day need to work at maintaining or gaining weight, I would have collapsed laughing. The opposite had always been my problem and I've always loved to eat - just about anything.

Then, even after recovering from the extensive Whipple surgery 13 months ago, I wasn't hungry much of the time.

As happened to with me, serious diseases and conditions can reduce appetite in elders but it is not uncommon for a remarkably long list of other reasons too. Here are some of both kinds:

Any acute illness such as:
Cardiac disease
COPD
Renal failure
Liver disease
Parkinson's disease
Cancer
Alzheimer's disease

Other difficulties such as:
Dental conditions or denture problems
Reduced saliva production
Swallowing problems
Constipation
Impaired senses of smell and taste
Medication side effects
Depression
Loneliness
Lack of energy to cook

And that's just a partial list from which, I suppose, it can be extrapolated that pretty much every old person has an appetite problem at one time or another.

The BBC website tell us that changes to appetite happen throughout our lives but become more common in old age:

“After the age of 50, we begin to suffer a gradual loss of muscle mass, at between 0.5-1% per year. This is called sarcopenia, and lessened physical activity, consuming too little protein, and menopause in women will accelerate the decline in muscle mass.”

At age 60 and beyond, the BBC continues, old age and lack of hunger can lead “to unintentional weight loss and greater frailty,” and frailty is nothing to fool around with. The opening paragraph of Wikipedia's entry about it is worth quoting if just for the literary reference that amuses me:

 

”Frailty is a condition associated with ageing, and it has been recognized for centuries. As described by Shakespeare in As You Like It, 'the sixth age shifts into the lean and slipper’d pantaloon, with spectacles on nose and pouch on side, his youthful hose well sav’d, a world too wide, for his shrunk shank…'

“The shrunk shank is a result of loss of muscle with aging. It is also a marker of a more widespread syndrome of frailty, with associated weakness, slowing, decreased energy, lower activity, and, when severe, unintended weight loss.”

Unintended weight loss is serious business that is difficult to reverse in elders. A good-sized 2017 study about appetite in elders discovered that

”...older adults with poor appetites ate much less protein and dietary fiber. They also ate fewer solid foods, protein-rich foods, whole grains, fruits, and vegetables.

“However, people with poor appetite did eat/drink more dairy foods, fats, oils, sweets, and sodas compared to older adults who reported having very good appetites...

“The team concluded that identifying the specific food preferences of older adults with poor appetites could be helpful for learning how to help improve their appetite and the quality of their diets.”

Directly following my surgery, I was told to eat six small meals a day. I was lucky to be able to get down four before anything more that day threatened to cause me to vomit. But the nurses were terrific in helping me figure out how to increase the high daily calorie count I needed to prevent more weight loss.

Little things, they said, like adding grated cheese to scrambled eggs, switching to whole milk for cereal, eating as much of my two favorite foods – ice cream and cheese – as I wanted, also peanut butter, lots of high protein foods including red meat.

They also recommended that old folks' staple, protein drinks. I won't mention brand names because I dislike all the supermarket brands – it's like trying to drink glue to get them down.

(I go out of my way to not mention product names here and I tell you this one for information purposes: I finally discovered a brand of protein drink that actually tastes good: Odwalla. They make other kinds of drinks so if more protein is your goal, be sure to use the bottles labeled “Protein.” on the front. Of course, everyone's tastes differ.)

For the first three or four months, I wasn't allowed most vegetables and no fresh fruit with small seeds. When I said I was concerned about my health with such a high fat, high protein diet, one nurse said, “Ronni, cancer will kill you long before this diet will,” so I stopped complaining and followed instructions.

As much as the point was to keep up my weight, it was also to accommodate the radical surgery that removed quite a few pieces of my digestive system – something that would not apply to the diet of those who haven't had this kind of surgery.

Nowadays, just over a year since the surgery, I eat a normal three meals a day, am back on lots of salads, fish and fruit but I've hung on to red meat once or twice a week and I drink Odwalla (average 300 calories per 15 ounce container) several times a week.

Plus, I weigh myself every morning and keep a chart. Mostly my weight is stable but if it drops more two pounds within a week, I up the calorie intake for awhile.

And now, after nearly a year off, I am back to my workout four times a week. I've lost a lot of muscle mass and doubt I'll get much of it back, but I can work at strengthning the muscles I've got.

The point is to fight back against loss of appetite – it will go a long way to keeping us healthy and active. WebMD has a good list of strategies to help overcome lack of hunger.

What's your experience with anexoria of ageing?

Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 5,058
Registered: ‎09-12-2010

Re: I suddenly understand why older people lose interest in cooking.

@house_cat, I can identify with what you're saying. My hubby has health issues too, and many times he just isn't very hungry. I seldom cook anything very time consuming anymore, except for maybe a few times during the winter. I now cook much simpler meals - sometimes just grilled sandwiches or homemade soup bacon/eggs - occasionally a meat loaf - things like that. Fortunately he's quite happy to fend for himself when he gets hungry if it's a day when I don't cook much.

Honored Contributor
Posts: 8,099
Registered: ‎03-17-2010

Re: I suddenly understand why older people lose interest in cooking.

[ Edited ]

When my Mother was having diffculty swallowing the drinks that would help her,  nurse suggested to me that she may prefer Carnation instant breakfast, that this breakfast drink would provide nearly as much nutrition as the already bottled ones in the store and taste better.... Woman Happy

*~"Never eat more than you can lift......" Miss Piggy~*