Reply
Honored Contributor
Posts: 9,872
Registered: ‎03-09-2010

Be honest, would this bother you?

[ Edited ]

 

 

Many years ago, my family was invited to my dad's sister's house for dinner.  I was only a kid, but I remember the awkwardness when my dad brought an egglplant dish expecting that my aunt would be happy about his contribution. 

 

She wasn't.

 

Mom and Dad were discussing her reaction on the way home and he couldn't understand why she was upset that he had brought something.  Even as a child it seemed clear to me that he should not have brought food without being asked.

 

I'm not sure why this memory came to me recently, but I'm just wondering how other's would feel in that situation.  

 

Would it bother you if you prepared dinner for guests and one of them showed up with an extra entree, side dish or dessert?

 

~ house cat ~
Trusted Contributor
Posts: 1,259
Registered: ‎06-27-2010

Re: Be honest, would this bother you?

Not at all and in my family everyone shows up with something even if you tell them not to bother.  

Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 7,427
Registered: ‎01-27-2014

Re: Be honest, would this bother you?

Of course it would NOT bother me. Your dad was being very nice. And, for goodness sakes....they were siblings! That was rude of your aunt to be displeased. 

Valued Contributor
Posts: 570
Registered: ‎04-13-2016

Re: Be honest, would this bother you?

Not at all. Most people bring something when invited to dinner at someone's home. Only common courtesy. 

Valued Contributor
Posts: 908
Registered: ‎12-13-2022

Re: Be honest, would this bother you?

It wouldn't bother me at all - on the contrary, I would be thrilled if someone brought another entree!

Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 6,399
Registered: ‎06-10-2015

Re: Be honest, would this bother you?

[ Edited ]

Yes it would, especially if it was eggplant!  Seriously, if I went to the trouble to prepare a nice meal I would be annoyed but not show it. If one feels the need to bring something, make it flowers.

Honored Contributor
Posts: 18,922
Registered: ‎03-13-2010

Re: Be honest, would this bother you?

Depends.     If the guest is a vegetarian,  has religious or medical  restrictions, they could bring something they were comfortable eating.

♥Surface of the Sun♥
Honored Contributor
Posts: 32,628
Registered: ‎03-10-2010

Re: Be honest, would this bother you?

If you are invited somewhere ask before you bring something.  If they say no, then don't.

 

I HATE when people bring something without asking. It is rude, upsets a planned meal, has to be made room for and put somewhere, serving pieces found for it, etc.

 

And either it doesn't fit with what is being served, is awful, or competes with what the hosts are serving.

 

It is a rude thing to do and an attention grab.

Honored Contributor
Posts: 41,337
Registered: ‎03-09-2010

Re: Be honest, would this bother you?

dessert?......no

 

extra side dish or entree?......possibly, especially if it had to stay warm prior to eating.

 

usually i ask first if the host would like me to bring something and i would ask them what they would prefer if they said yes. 

 

just from reading here for many years, i know that there are quite a few people who dont like eating or serving items that OTHERS have made. some people even throw them right into the trash once their guest leaves.

********************************************
"The world is a dangerous place, not because of those who do evil, but because of those who look on and do nothing." - Albert Einstein
Highlighted
Trusted Contributor
Posts: 1,467
Registered: ‎12-13-2020

Re: Be honest, would this bother you?

@house_cat  No, it wouldn't bother me at all. The more food the merrier. Having said that, in my Italian half of the family no one comes empty handed. It's just the way it is.