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[occasionalrain]

On 12/26/2014 JJ said:

While I agree with the "your house, your rules" concept, that was not OP's question. She asked if it was rude. And the answer to that is yes, it is rude. There are several legitimate reasons why some people need to wear shoes all the time. And even if it is just their personal comfort, I would never want a guest in my house to be uncomfortable in my home.

I guess I was raised to be a good hostess. A good hostess does not want her guests to be uncomfortable. And I will say, that most guests who are uncomfortable taking their shoes off, will do it anyway if they are asked, and most likely will not say anything to you about it because, they want to be a good "guest".

And frankly, it does not matter what the custom is in Hawaii. Unless you live in Hawaii, the Hawaiian custom is irrelevant.

I'll second the well said.

[feline groovy]

I would just have really-effective door mats outside every entrance, for myself and anyone else to use. Really no biggie.

[Spunkyspouts]

I don't think it is rude or unreasonable and the reason and traditions of doing this vary for many legit reasons. I have had a lady take her shoes off here and told her to put them back on, I stay on top of my carpeting. I am not above asking them to take it off it need be though. It seems not that important either way. Now if your feet get cold, thats another story.

[Pook]

On 12/27/2014 occasional rain said:

On 12/26/2014 JJ said:

While I agree with the "your house, your rules" concept, that was not OP's question. She asked if it was rude. And the answer to that is yes, it is rude. There are several legitimate reasons why some people need to wear shoes all the time. And even if it is just their personal comfort, I would never want a guest in my house to be uncomfortable in my home.

I guess I was raised to be a good hostess. A good hostess does not want her guests to be uncomfortable. And I will say, that most guests who are uncomfortable taking their shoes off, will do it anyway if they are asked, and most likely will not say anything to you about it because, they want to be a good "guest".

And frankly, it does not matter what the custom is in Hawaii. Unless you live in Hawaii, the Hawaiian custom is irrelevant.

I'll second the well said.

I agree with this also! I could never see making any guest that I invite to my home uncomfortable in any way.

The big thing with the OP is not in wanting others to remove their shoes even though it seems in poor taste, but in the need to inform guests prior to arriving at her door that this is the rule at her place. She can tell them to either bring slippers, socks or a pair of clean bottomed shoes to wear so they can choose to either come or not and so they won't be blindsided with this request. and if they choose to come then they can be prepared.

[memyselfandI]

On 12/27/2014 occasional rain said:

On 12/26/2014 JJ said:

While I agree with the "your house, your rules" concept, that was not OP's question. She asked if it was rude. And the answer to that is yes, it is rude. There are several legitimate reasons why some people need to wear shoes all the time. And even if it is just their personal comfort, I would never want a guest in my house to be uncomfortable in my home.

I guess I was raised to be a good hostess. A good hostess does not want her guests to be uncomfortable. And I will say, that most guests who are uncomfortable taking their shoes off, will do it anyway if they are asked, and most likely will not say anything to you about it because, they want to be a good "guest".

And frankly, it does not matter what the custom is in Hawaii. Unless you live in Hawaii, the Hawaiian custom is irrelevant.

I'll second the well said.

I will third that. I do have friends where I know wearing shoes in their house would send them over the edge so I know in advance to bring my arch support slippers. But I have had three foot/ankle surgeries and have been told to never be without support on my feet unless I am non-weight bearing or taking a shower. And honestly, the slippers are right by the shower for immediate wearing.

I live in a home, not a house. I have a lovely home and I am not sure what "upscale" means except it seems to me there seems to be a lot of bragging here to use that word.... I live in the real world where lord know what the dogs and kids bring home. I own a steam cleaner and non-toxic cleaners. Feel free to visit me in my house. I can clean after you go home. (past- I clean bathrooms after you all leave too because lord knows what you do in there).

But the question asked was is it rude? Yes. But if you simply can't tolerate it than go ahead and ask. It is your house. But yeah, it is rude - not the most rude I have seen but it is hardly what gracious hostesses do.

[sunshine45]

i am with the "it isnt rude" group although most of my friends and family already remove shoes when they enter my home......and i do the same in their homes.

i dont force the issue, but i certainly prefer it.

[DiAnne]

On 12/28/2014 memyselfandI said:

On 12/27/2014 occasional rain said:

On 12/26/2014 JJ said:

While I agree with the "your house, your rules" concept, that was not OP's question. She asked if it was rude. And the answer to that is yes, it is rude. There are several legitimate reasons why some people need to wear shoes all the time. And even if it is just their personal comfort, I would never want a guest in my house to be uncomfortable in my home.

I guess I was raised to be a good hostess. A good hostess does not want her guests to be uncomfortable. And I will say, that most guests who are uncomfortable taking their shoes off, will do it anyway if they are asked, and most likely will not say anything to you about it because, they want to be a good "guest".

And frankly, it does not matter what the custom is in Hawaii. Unless you live in Hawaii, the Hawaiian custom is irrelevant.

I'll second the well said.

I will third that. I do have friends where I know wearing shoes in their house would send them over the edge so I know in advance to bring my arch support slippers. But I have had three foot/ankle surgeries and have been told to never be without support on my feet unless I am non-weight bearing or taking a shower. And honestly, the slippers are right by the shower for immediate wearing.

I live in a home, not a house. I have a lovely home and I am not sure what "upscale" means except it seems to me there seems to be a lot of bragging here to use that word.... I live in the real world where lord know what the dogs and kids bring home. I own a steam cleaner and non-toxic cleaners. Feel free to visit me in my house. I can clean after you go home. (past- I clean bathrooms after you all leave too because lord knows what you do in there).

But the question asked was is it rude? Yes. But if you simply can't tolerate it than go ahead and ask. It is your house. But yeah, it is rude - not the most rude I have seen but it is hardly what gracious hostesses do.

I think it is rude but I think if your carpets are more important than your guests that is certainly your right.

[Zoologist_1]

Absolutely, positively RUDE!!!

[Abby Grace]

I don't believe it's rude. I would ask you to consider giving them a heads up before they arrive. At times some of us are unable to take a single step barefoot, and I would gladly provide my own "house shoes".

PS- The dirty conditions are one thing, but the broken glass is unsafe, good luck if you decide to continue to live there.

[HHC1]

I respect the rules of people's homes and appreciate when they do the same.

The main floor of my home is decorated in white and other neutral colors. I rarely entertain, but ask my guests to remove their shoes when they visit.