Re: Excuse me while I rant about our house

ccassaday · ‎10-21-2010

@IamMrsG wrote:
@ccassaday wrote:
@Just Bling wrote:
OP" If you were my daughter, disability or not, and I read what you wrote, I would find alternative living quarters for you.

This is one of the worse threads I have ever read disrespecting your entire family. It's not your money, get over it. When you spend your own money, you can make those decisions, until then, you go with the flow.

I'm going to pass on any of your threads (i'm sure you won't mind) because your responses make me very sad.
I am no way being disrespectful. If anything this is why it's hard. I have no say in this but I am going to have a much better situation with my own space. So what do I do not get excited until it's done. Imagine not having a proper shower. ~~Our~~ Their dining room was turned into a shower room when I moved in because it's a two story house. ~~Our~~ Their living room which we didn't use was made into two rooms. One for the bedroom and the other half the grandkids playroom. I have nowhere to even sit and do my hair or makeup. So yes I am very excited to move and have my space. I am very grateful my parents let me move in with them. Otherwise I would be stuck in assisted living with no life at all. Their lives changed when I had to move in. I have a lot of stress on my plate right now with upcoming surgery. The hard part here is I have no say in what they do but it benefits me greatly.
@ccassaday The one thing you should say is, "Thank you."

And I do. That was pretty disrespectful to cross out my words. You realize this is my childhood home. I have lived here since I was five. So yes I do feel like this is my home. And I am sure my parents want me to think of it as my home

granny me · ‎09-05-2014

I have read through your posts on this thread and I am shocked. I am sorry you are disabled, but you are also ungreatful. Please don't tell me you have nothing to be greatful for because there is always, and I mean always others who have it worse. As hard as it is living with your parents I can assume there must be times when they feel the same. They are after all humans who experience the highs and lows everyday life which are compounded by the thought of their own deaths and what will happen to you. I am sure they are doing what is best not only themselves but for you. And maybe, just maybe you could cut them some slack.

I know this is harsh sounding, but my personal interpertation of your posts are that you are probably not that easy to live with either.

AuntG · ‎03-09-2010

Thumbs up to @granny me for speaking the truth to someone who needs to think about it. If my parents modified their home for me, not having a space to do my makeup would be the last thing on my mind.

proudlyfromNJ · ‎05-01-2010

@ccassaday. Hang in there. I have seen how excited you have been over the months. I also realize you are just venting. I hope everything works out. This whole situation involves Family, not a bunch of unrelated strangers. Families have all type of differing opinions etc. and have to work them out. It happens.

Bri36 · ‎02-20-2017

I think it's very unfair of you to say they went into this with no budget in mind. That's extremely short-sighted.

It isn't fair to paint your parents in this light. We are only hearing your version of the story. I can't imagine anyone, let alone people in their 60s who are about to retire, making a decision about builing a house from the ground up without some sort of budget or idea of what things cost.

house_cat · ‎03-09-2010

@ccassaday

It sounds like your disability came as a surprise to you and your family. You are understandably stressed, but you must realize that they are, as well. I know personally, that the only people who feel your pain more intensely than you do are your parents. It seems clear from your posts that they are trying to do what's best for you. Try to find comfort in that fact and trust that it will all work out, though maybe not as quickly as you hoped. It sounds like you're dealing with a lot of changes in your life. If it's possible, seek counseling to help you through it.

~ house cat ~

ccassaday · ‎10-21-2010

@Bri36 wrote:
I think it's very unfair of you to say they went into this with no budget in mind. That's extremely short-sighted.

It isn't fair to paint your parents in this light. We are only hearing your version of the story. I can't imagine anyone, let alone people in their 60s who are about to retire, making a decision about builing a house from the ground up without some sort of budget or idea of what things cost.

Actually the no budget thing is true. My dad admitted several times when they started he didn't know what their budget will be. It wasn't until they got the bid on the very first set of plans and went and talked to the bank they decided what the budget was. They kind of did it backwards.

ccassaday · ‎10-21-2010

@house_cat wrote:
@ccassaday

It sounds like your disability came as a surprise to you and your family. You are understandably stressed, but you must realize that they are, as well. I know personally, that the only people who feel your pain more intensely than you do are your parents. It seems clear from your posts that they are trying to do what's best for you. Try to find comfort in that fact and trust that it will all work out, though maybe not as quickly as you hoped. It sounds like you're dealing with a lot of changes in your life. If it's possible, seek counseling to help you through it.

Not really a suprise. I lived on my own for about 16 years. I worked a full time job. My disability finally caught up with me. I got very sick and ended up in the hospital for 3 months. I have had my condition since I was a teenager.

no I don't need counseling. I just have a lot going on right now. I am usually a very chill person. I was just venting. I am very grateful to everything my parents have done. Three years ago when I was in the hospital and then I came to live with them it was stressful on all of us. But we got into a routine and got settled and it all worked out.

Melania · ‎06-12-2013

It was beyond disrespectful. You called your father a crybaby all because he doesn't want more debt at age 60 and on! You sound like you have forced the early retirement too just so you can get what you want.

You act like they owe you. It is shameful...disability or not.

What happens when they need to have help as they age and or die?

Will your makeup space be worth it? Makeup...SMH.

ccassaday · ‎10-21-2010

@Melania wrote:
It was beyond disrespectful. You called your father a crybaby all because he doesn't want more debt at age 60 and on! You sound like you have forced the early retirement too just so you can get what you want.

You act like they owe you. It is shameful...disability or not.
What happens when they need to have help as they age and or die?
Will your makeup space be worth it? Makeup...SMH.

Seriously. My dad isn't retiring early. He will be 65. They have had plans to build this house way before I ever moved in. He was going to retire at 64 but waited a extra year. He was devasted when he thought he might have to work until 66 because of insurance for my mom. I have never even talked to him about if and when he should retire. That's his choice. Plus he doesn't have to retire for us to get a new house. This house is going to let them stay in their home as long as possible also. Our current home if something happened to them would not work because it is two stories. So they are thinking about their future also.