Reply
Valued Contributor
Posts: 782
Registered: ‎12-15-2017

A friend of mine is a hoarder.  After many years, she has finally let someone help her clean out her house.  She still has a long way to go, but is certainly on the right path forward.  What about you...know any hoarders?

Honored Contributor
Posts: 10,992
Registered: ‎01-10-2013

Re: Do you know any hoarders?

My neighbor's best friend is a hoarder. When I see her, of course, you would never know. Her marriage broke up and her kids moved out. 

I hope some day she realizes she needs help.

I watch that show once in a while and really feel sorry for some of them. There's always a reason why it happens.

 

 

Happy Sunday Weekend GIF - Happy Sunday Weekend Cup GIFs
Trusted Contributor
Posts: 1,068
Registered: ‎03-21-2010

Re: Do you know any hoarders?

[ Edited ]

My neighbor was a hoarder.  Her place was filled floor to ceiling stuff with just path through the rooms.  Just one little spot to sit on her couch.  Her refridgerator had the groceries, still in the bags, just piled in there.  Her bedroom was the same, as was her bed with just one little spot for her to curl up in a ball on.

 

I knew all this because she asked me to feed her cat while she was away.  I felt so bad for that cat and being in her place gave me serious anxiety.  I don't know how she found anything.  Surprisingly, it didn't stink inside her house, even with the cat.  She told me her dad was the same way with the hoarding. 

 

I didn't know her well... and frankly I didn't want to.  That way of living signifies a serious problem.  It is a mental health problem or at least it shows very poor judgment.  What if there is a fire or some other thing.  

 

I do find the show Hoarders fascinating, though.  I don't know how people live like that.  I am the complete opposite.  I like clear tabletops and counters. lots of open space to relax. 

 

When my neighbor stopped by my place.  She was openly shocked by how clean it was and had the nerve to say to me-- "oh I could never live like this!"  

 

How rude!  I didn't say anything to her to judged her or her junk.  But she obviously felt some kind of way with that reaction.  lol.  She eventually met a guy and moved in with him.  She said he saw how she lived.  So he was ok with it.  I don't know.  She moved away and I wished her all the best.  lol.  

Trusted Contributor
Posts: 1,506
Registered: ‎04-25-2020

Re: Do you know any hoarders?


@pprmntstx wrote:

A friend of mine is a hoarder.  After many years, she has finally let someone help her clean out her house.  She still has a long way to go, but is certainly on the right path forward.  What about you...know any hoarders?


@pprmntstx No, I don't know any.  But I do remember, back in the day, (my day anyway, LOL)  that we called them "pack rats."

I would give everything I own just to have you back again.......David Gates of Bread
Respected Contributor
Posts: 4,388
Registered: ‎06-19-2010

Re: Do you know any hoarders?

There is a guy down the street who went into the hospital last year. Don't know what happened but his kids I guess came over and ordered 3 giant construction dumpsters and filled them to the top and that was just the house. They didn't finish the garage or back yard. He has lived there since 1986 and I don't think he has done one thing to the house. No paint, no new A/C, no new roof. I can only imagine what it's like inside. He definitely needs help but it isn't my call.

Respected Contributor
Posts: 2,159
Registered: ‎06-08-2020

Re: Do you know any hoarders?

I think we all know hoarders. There are degrees of hoarding. Just  because their place may not be to the degree we see portrayed on television, or what images we have in our mind, doesn't necessarily mean a cluttered house is not hoarding. It is.

 
I know several people that hoard. Some make numerous purchases and keep organized clutter. It's hoarding. 

I know a messy hoarder that doesn't  want to talk about their issue. She becomes agitated when it's brought up. 

My nephews significant other has a house that her and her mom share...as a storage unit, and the place is cluttered to the point where it is unliveable.  Her mom "stays" at her mothers place. They never admit she lives there.


The nephews significant other has never let him see where the house is located. She has never brought him there and she "believes"he doesn't know.

 

The apartment they live in is starting to become cluttered now but my nephew tries hard to organize it. She kept the Christmas tree up for months and months and it was seen on Face Time. She was mortified.

 

She has now distanced herself from his family and he is doing the same. It's very sad to see this affect my sisters family. The denial and shame is sad. A family is being torn apart. I don't think she'll seek help, and he is enabling her. 

 

 

 

Respected Contributor
Posts: 2,977
Registered: ‎03-09-2010

Re: Do you know any hoarders?

I can't watch those shows - they give me anxiety.

 

I grew up in a house with a lot of clutter.  "Stuff" on every surface.  And I think later in life my Mom became a hoarder..  My grandmother was much the same way.   They couldn't throw anything away.  My husband was a bit like that too.  Not as bad as some of these people but just too much junk for me.  As a result - I think - I'm a neat freak.  I'm constantly purging.

 

What I'll never understand is the garbage in some of these houses.  It's much more than hoadring IMO.  And I remember seeina a house years ago that had no running water for years.  Can you imagine the filth and stench?  

Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 5,843
Registered: ‎04-14-2013

Re: Do you know any hoarders?

Yes.  It appears as a deep and complex mental state of denial.

 

The facility to keep it "hidden" just exacerbates the denial.  The worse it becomes, the greater the denial yet also the more evident to those around, hence greater denial, and on and on it goes.

 

Unraveling the underlying cause can be guided but has to come from the hoarding individual.  The notion of "blame" needs to be re-considered, and "responsibility" to take its place.

 

I've run out of oxygen for this.  (No, I am not a hoarder)

Cogito ergo sum
Honored Contributor
Posts: 27,701
Registered: ‎03-10-2010

Re: Do you know any hoarders?

It's not unknown in rural areas with high poverty rates.  People or their families were destitute so they can't throw anything away.  Some are happy and proud of their "stuff."

 

Old cars in the yard, washers and broke down chairs and sofas on the porch, etc.  Sheds and back yards stuffed with discarded items.

 

The name for it where I grew up was "junkers." They are poor and might need something, and many enjoy it as a hobby, some just don't have the ambition to deal with throwing something away.  Too much trouble.

Trusted Contributor
Posts: 1,397
Registered: ‎11-02-2015

Re: Do you know any hoarders?


@FranandZoe wrote:

I can't watch those shows - they give me anxiety.

 

I grew up in a house with a lot of clutter.  "Stuff" on every surface.  And I think later in life my Mom became a hoarder..  My grandmother was much the same way.   They couldn't throw anything away.  My husband was a bit like that too.  Not as bad as some of these people but just too much junk for me.  As a result - I think - I'm a neat freak.  I'm constantly purging.

 

What I'll never understand is the garbage in some of these houses.  It's much more than hoadring IMO.  And I remember seeina a house years ago that had no running water for years.  Can you imagine the filth and stench?  


@FranandZoe    I'm a neat freak too.  My parents were meticulous so I guess it's inherited.    Actually, I can't even stand dishes in the sink!  Since I am retired now..I like to keep things simple.  I recently donated half my closet of dressier work clothes and it was so liberating.  My only weakness is shoes. But... my granddaughter has already claimed some to keep for her.   Seeing that she is only 9, I doubt she will want them when they actually fit.  So...For now she has them put aside in the corner of my closet.  🤗