Handbags

[1Professor]

Adore handbags? Seduced by the structure, design, touch, colors of a well-built handbag? Own "several?"

I am a Handbag Lover. I notice and admire the ones other women carry. I adore a handbag show. I change mine often. Every week. Somedays more. However, [INSERT CONFESSION HERE] I have many gorgeous bags that sit unused. Sometimes—for a LONG time. 

Among the courses I teach is THE SCIENCE OF HAPPINESS, where we look at neuroscience, our brains, and why once we get some of the "things" we wanted, well, they no longer make us as happy as we thought (hedonic adaptation or Happiness Fade). Humans are particularly bad at future-thinking and predicting what will make us happy in the far future. {What was I thinking?} Teaching such a courses causes useful self-reflection. 

People change. Our values change, what delights us changes, our styles change, the foods and music we enjoy changes. So it is with handbags. If you've got any guilt over having too many handbags, some of which aren't actually ever chosen to be worn, many of us are in your company.

Yet new handbags seduce me. I've changed. I want different styles, no longer choose old classics. So, now I send handbags off to others. Strangers. My rule: 1 new handbag in, 2 new handbags out.

Here's a conversation I had recently with @EdithEllenLily:

@EdithEllenLily wrote:

@Roni18 Parting with my handbags has been very painful for me since mid-August when I started taking them to the consignment shop. I know it's the right thing to do, but it's extremely difficult. It's an admission of which ones were bought but never used -- or those that just didn't work out after carrying them once. For me, it must be done. Good luck if you start sorting through yours and figuring out what to do about them. I am very thankful for @1Professor because she encouraged me to find a consignment shop. It's the best thing for me right now, even though it's completely wigging me out to see them go.  

@EdithEllenLily: Courage, dear sister!

I just took some Florentine leather Dooneys (used once) with original tags to consignment. I take great joy in the joy someone else will get from them.

Next week, some Brahmins . . .

You are giving joy.

@1Professor Thank you so much for your kind encouragement. Your words meant a lot to me. I forgot to look at it that way...giving joy to others. Good job to you for continuing to pare down your handbag collection. You have some absolutely beautiful handbags! 

I don't regret the handbags I once loved (or thought I would love) leaving at all. Giving them to a stranger, even on consignment, is not very much money back. BUT she's not a stranger. She loves handbags! So do you! 

I picture her carrying my once-desired bag and the places it will go. It makes me happy. Then I have room to try out a new style.

I feel badly for the bags (I know, fanciful thinking) that sit in their protective bags in my closet. "Release me!"

Anyone else releasing? Realize your style has changed and SO WHAT?!

Still have many. High-end, or just whimsical. My newest bags that make me happy

are Anuschka:

[NJgirl 1205]

I guess I am in the opposite category to you.  I used to buy quirky, artsy, low to mid range bags largely on impulse.  As I have gotten older I prefer the pricier, more elegant  classics. So I now have a much more expensive, MUCH smaller collection of bags  that I actually love and use.

[1Professor]

@NJgirl 1205: Not opposites, cousins perhaps. Neighbors.

I own and love several classic Louis Vuitton and Gucci and appreciate the fine crafting, the way they carry, their history. I have a Florentine Dooney that is a keeper (others now released). 

When my world gets hectic, overscheduled, time-starved, it is the Bags of Whimsy that keep me grounded. I love a classic couture blazer, back pencil skirt, cashmere sweater, pearls and heels—accessorized with a bag of whimsy . . .

[NJgirl 1205]

Nice to meet you neighbor!  I say do and buy what makes you happy!  Plus, you have found a solution for those times when you own something you don’t reach for and pass the happiness on to someone else!  I do the same with clothes and don’t get me started on coats😉

[Sweet_Serenity]

Here's my experience...

Last week decided it was time to bid farewell to coach vintage bag that never used tags attached pristine condition, first planned consignment store then...

Shopping at my Publix lightbulb came on!  

Mary woman who works at Publix, strong desire gifting the bag to her.

Special gift bag carefully wrapped proceeded onto the store. 

Mary, was over the moon excited! She held it close to her touching expressing

her appreciation for the gift, never had such a lovely handbag. 

She hugged me tightly, said she would always cherish it. 

Experienced a very special moment. Made my day! 

[1Professor]

@Sweet_Serenity: Best handbag story EVER! 

[QVCkitty1]

---

@Sweet_Serenity wrote:

Here's my experience...

Last week decided it was time to bid farewell to coach vintage bag that never used tags attached pristine condition, first planned consignment store then...

Shopping at my Publix lightbulb came on!  

Mary woman who works at Publix, strong desire gifting the bag to her.

Special gift bag carefully wrapped proceeded onto the store. 

Mary, was over the moon excited! She held it close to her touching expressing

her appreciation for the gift, never had such a lovely handbag. 

She hugged me tightly, said she would always cherish it. 

Experienced a very special moment. Made my day! 

---

I love this story !!

[EdithEllenLily]

@1Professor I hope our conversation helps others to realize they are not alone in their handbag shopping -- and perhaps it will give them ideas on how to pare down!!

Interesting about the science part. I so wish I could take your course!!

Each month since August I think 'what handbags would people like to buy this month' and then I bring them into the shop. I'm mulling over the options for the December consignment.

Still, when I drop them off and walk away, I am totally wigging out that they are gone!! I'm not sure how to deal with that aspect. It makes me bummy!

But it needs to be done. And I will keep doing it until my handbag collection is where it needs to be. 

Thanks for writing about this perhaps not so uncommon topic.

[Lisa Y]

@1Professor

Hi. I am a handbag lover and your post could have been written by me. Knowing that other women feel as I do about our bags makes me feel good.  I often give my bags to my mother and sisters, so I know they are getting loved and used. I’m thinking of selling some of my Dooneys if possible and putting the money toward my son’s future education. (He’s a sophomore in HS). Every little bit helps. I’m trying not to buy more bags, and discovered that shopping in my closet has been fun. (Oh, I forgot about this one!)

Thanks for your post and happy holidays!  👜👜👜🎒🎒🎒

[phoenixbrd]

@1ProfessorI have an opposite story.  I will see a bag I covet and don't purchase.  Then for years I will continue to hunt down that bag regretting that I didn't buy it.  The Anuschka original Enchanted Forest Fairy expandable shopper is a bag I've continually looked at for years. Why didn't I just purchase it when I first saw it.  Very few items seduce me, and I've learned that the compulsion to purchase an item fades into the distance, but a few have remained with me for years.  I share your love of classic dressing, but I enjoy adding a little edge or whimsy, that bag is perfect.  Periodically I search to see if someone is selling one.  Evine reintroduced the bag but not the same as the original shopper, I don't think Anuschka is the quality product it was ten years ago.

I am releasing clothing and shoes and it is a challenge but I'm making progress feeling a sense of freedom. My rule is similar to yours, bring one item into the closet I must release three. I rarely make new purchases. Unfortunately, that bag still haunts me.