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Honored Contributor
Posts: 9,086
Registered: ‎06-10-2010

Re: "A Dress I Have No Business Wearing"

My grandmother was a large woman when I was a child and a teenager.  She could get down and dirty on the farm and do a mans work in her shorts and sleeveless tops or she could go to a special occassion in a long gown, red nails, etc. and be the best dressed woman there. She would put on her one piece fitted black bathing suit and could dive like an olympian and swim like a fish.    She never gave a thought about what others thought and of all the women I have ever known....she lived her life to the fullest not caring what others thought.  If she liked it....she liked it.  It wouldn't have mattered to her if no one else did.  She was confident, kind and generous and one of the most well rounded (no pun intended) women I ever knew.  Oh...and you should have seen her do the "Charleston"!!!!!

Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 6,605
Registered: ‎03-16-2010

Re: "A Dress I Have No Business Wearing"


@jubilant wrote:

My grandmother was a large woman when I was a child and a teenager.  She could get down and dirty on the farm and do a mans work in her shorts and sleeveless tops or she could go to a special occassion in a long gown, red nails, etc. and be the best dressed woman there. She would put on her one piece fitted black bathing suit and could dive like an olympian and swim like a fish.    She never gave a thought about what others thought and of all the women I have ever known....she lived her life to the fullest not caring what others thought.  If she liked it....she liked it.  It wouldn't have mattered to her if no one else did.  She was confident, kind and generous and one of the most well rounded (no pun intended) women I ever knew.  Oh...and you should have seen her do the "Charleston"!!!!!


This is a beautiful story.  I think it was last year while shopping for a swimsuit I watched two "large" women leave their dressing rooms to come out to the sales floor to view themselves in a three-way mirror.  They were laughing and seemed full of joy talking about their upcoming vacation.  I was in awe. At half their size, there is no way I would parade around a store in a swimsuit.  

 

Body issues are real.  No matter your size.   

Valued Contributor
Posts: 824
Registered: ‎12-30-2010

Re: "A Dress I Have No Business Wearing"


@magicmoodz wrote:

@zitawins wrote:

I'd never wear that, but if the person wants to make a fool of herself, so be it. Not everyone viewing her would see the "spiritual" side of her confidence. She just looks dumb.


Clearly you view people through a superficial lens as if garments are a barometer to someone's soul.  

 


Lets get real -who goes to dinner or a wedding or any event -sees a woman dressed like that and thinks oh my what a beautiful soul she must have

No -the fist thought is does she own shapewear or a mirror?

If thats seeing someone through a superficial lens so be it and the woman dressed that way knows it too

 

 

Respected Contributor
Posts: 3,180
Registered: ‎03-11-2010

Re: "A Dress I Have No Business Wearing"

@jubilant

 

What great role model your grandmother was !

Valued Contributor
Posts: 824
Registered: ‎12-30-2010

Re: "A Dress I Have No Business Wearing"


@jubilant wrote:

My grandmother was a large woman when I was a child and a teenager.  She could get down and dirty on the farm and do a mans work in her shorts and sleeveless tops or she could go to a special occassion in a long gown, red nails, etc. and be the best dressed woman there. She would put on her one piece fitted black bathing suit and could dive like an olympian and swim like a fish.    She never gave a thought about what others thought and of all the women I have ever known....she lived her life to the fullest not caring what others thought.  If she liked it....she liked it.  It wouldn't have mattered to her if no one else did.  She was confident, kind and generous and one of the most well rounded (no pun intended) women I ever knew.  Oh...and you should have seen her do the "Charleston"!!!!!


I think what your grandmother was doing living her life was very different from what this woman is doing

 

Honored Contributor
Posts: 42,162
Registered: ‎08-23-2010

Re: "A Dress I Have No Business Wearing"

[ Edited ]

@Abrowneyegirl wrote:

I do not care what size you are or what you wear.

Clothes should fit properly and reflect you as a person.

Fit and Style and two different things.

 

I rather see a well dressed stylish,  size 20+ lady

than a size 2 squeezed into leggings that look like sausage casing.

 


 

@Abrowneyegirl

 

Well said ..... and I honestly think some people are missing the point here.    

 

I was raised to believe that every woman (and man) should dress to look their best .....   and accentuate the positive.   Everyone has a "negative" when it comes to their figure or physique, and learning to look their best is really a skill.   

 

IMO, the phrase "embrace your curves" has been seriously misunderstood.   If you are wearing something that shows all your rolls of fat ..... trust me ....  the too tight sausage casing look is NOT a good look.  Let's use some common sense here.

 

Plus ......  she really acknowledged how she really feels when she chose that title.    She's just trying to justify wearing something that looks rather bad on her.  JMO   

Respected Contributor
Posts: 2,020
Registered: ‎05-06-2016

Re: "A Dress I Have No Business Wearing"

I wear a 3X and don't do body-hugging dresses, but if she feels confident, go for it. I'm tired of mean girls and mean women who constantly tear others down to make them feel superior. With all the ****** that's been plaguing our country lately, seeing a belly poke out from a dress and being offended by it is extremely petty and superficial. 

Honored Contributor
Posts: 42,162
Registered: ‎08-23-2010

Re: "A Dress I Have No Business Wearing"

@lolakimono

 

When you get a chance to read post # 1 and the link, would you please weigh in on this debate?   I'd really appreciate your take on this.  TIA

Honored Contributor
Posts: 16,557
Registered: ‎01-06-2015

Re: "A Dress I Have No Business Wearing"

I don't see where she looks like a sausage casing there, her belly is protruding out. So what. If she wants to wear it anyway she should. I think that's part of her point. The overall post talks about her life and other priorities dictating it now.

 

Anyone who has the kind of life in which they can make shaping their body a top priority, bravo to them. I can't because my life is full of important priorities and yes my belly sticks out. I walk for cardio and mental health. I dress for me, a few days ago I actually bought stretchy skinny jeans. I'm a size 12 and I think they look good on me. Two years ago I was almost 15 pounds lighter due to stress. My clothes were hanging off me. My belly didn't stick out, it was flat. But my life was hell. 

 

When I was 19 I starved myself and people told me I looked good. Ha, not so funny.

 

I don't look as good as I could, but through long struggles and work and counsel and perseverance I am a better and stronger person inside than ever before. I AM WOMAN HEAR ME ROAR.  

 

 

"Never let the facts get in the way of a good story"
Honored Contributor
Posts: 42,162
Registered: ‎08-23-2010

Re: "A Dress I Have No Business Wearing"


@Cumbercookie13 wrote:

I wear a 3X and don't do body-hugging dresses, but if she feels confident, go for it. I'm tired of mean girls and mean women who constantly tear others down to make them feel superior. With all the ****** that's been plaguing our country lately, seeing a belly poke out from a dress and being offended by it is extremely petty and superficial. 


@Cumbercookie13

 

I guess part of the debate here stems from people having very different criteria when it comes to wardrobe selection.  

 

Someone can dress like a total slob and somehow  still "feel confident".   Just because someone "feels confident" certainly doesn't mean they look good.