Fashion

[Pook]

I don't understand why anyone would ignore the registry and get something that might not be useful. The registry is what is wanted and needed by the couple. It's not about the gift giver so a registry is not for lazy people with no imaginations!! If you really want to get a gift for the couple forget about YOUR wanting to be creative. It's selfish to give what you want - just give from the registry.

[judgejudith]

On 1/2/2015 wilma said:

On 1/2/2015 Iwantcoffee said:

I would buy something from the registry. It does not matter if I like it or not, it for the couple, not me. Household items may not be exciting, but they are necessary.

Exactly.

I am sorry if it sounds ungrateful, but I received several unwanted gifts for my bridal shower. While they may have been nice, they weren't on my registry, and neither of us wanted them and we never used them. We gave them away eventually.

You are correct when you say you sound ungrateful because you received unwanted gifts at your shower. Remember, I am just agreeing with you!

I'm not sure when this trend started that the bride or mother-to-be is supposed to register and then EXPECTS to get all the things on their registries, but it is just wrong. A gift is something that the giver wants and can afford to give you. Let me repeat, a gift if something the giver wants to give you.

If a couple cannot afford to buy their own necessities...then they've got no business getting married or having a baby!

[violann]

On 1/2/2015 lulu2 said:

For a special bride-to-be, I usually give a piece of my own personal crystal or Belleek along with a gift card to the store where she's registered.

Perfect!

[Lipstickdiva]

On 1/2/2015 Sunshine Kate said:

On 1/2/2015 LipstickDiva said:

I'm not understanding why you would give someone an evening bag for a bridal shower. If this was a personal shower, that would be appropriate but I don't think it's appropriate for a bridal shower. Those should be household gifts for both the bride and the groom.

I guess it depends on her situation but when DH and I got married, we were young and just starting out. I was still in college and neither of us had ever lived on our own so we needed everything.

While some people went off the registry and got me crystal items like a pitcher, vase, bowl, etc., they weren't things I needed and honestly have barely been used. I appreciated the gifts and kept them but would rather have had things I registered for because at the time, a crystal vase wasn't practical for us.

A toaster or blender might not excite you but if they registered for it, it's something they want and need.

I don't think an evening bag is appropriate for a shower either.

I'm just wondering, isn't a bridal shower a personal shower? If not, what is a personal shower?

Some people roll a personal shower and bachelorette party into one. I had a "personal shower" that was only very close friends of mine. I think there were maybe 10 people tops there.

It is for personal items for the bride like lingerie, bath products, etc.

I don't know that everyone does a personal shower and they may be called something different now. I was married 24 years ago and that's what we called them.

[Theoriginallacey]

On 1/2/2015 brewhaha said:

Something from Adam & Eve.

Lol,I think this is my favorite answer. And if its small enough, you can put it in the evening bag.

[judgejudith]

Let's talk... Why I personally don't like gift registries:

1) I don't like anyone dictating to me what to buy!

2) List is so boring it puts me to sleep while I'm reading it and I cannot bear the thought of sitting through the ""opening of the gifts"" .. watching 25 boxes of various sizes of pampers being opened!

3) Everything on the registry is way more than I want to spend for a shower gift.

Registry Etiquette

The best places to register are department stores or specialty stores that cater to the couple's common interests. This helps out-of-town guests and guests who are unable to take time out for shopping to choose a gift before the big day. Never insist that guests shop at your registries only. Some of your guests may believe in the carefully chosen appropriate gift from other shops or even handmade gifts for that personal touch.

[Pook]

While a registry might be boring, it will ensure the couple gets what they want. I have never seen a registry where all the items were too expensive. Most have all price ranges. If nothing is within anyone's price range then a gift certificate to the stores where the registries are is best unless you know the couple well enough to know their tastes. I have seen some really awful gifts given by those who want to be cutsy and creataive and give a supposed "personal touch" and none were useful and it's not that they weren't appreciative of the thought but gee what the heck are they to do with something that has no use to them??!!!

A registry also insures that someone doesn't get 10 toasters or blenders also!

[sidsmom]

It's obvious the young bride-to-be is excited w/ what she picked out or she would've registered for the evening bag. Don't burden her w/ more things to do...like returning a gift she didn't want. Play it safe to the vest w/ this. Stick w/ the list.

[judgejudith]

It is beginning to sound ALOT like Christmas....you write a letter telling Santa or the department store,

them everything you want and then on the BIG day everything is there all wrapped up. Little kids and brides both have something in common...they both need to learn the lesson that in real life you don't get everything you want. Sometimes you just need to be happy you got any presents.

We go to showers today where we are expected to address our envelopes for the thank-you notes, so the bride can put her printed generic thank you in the envelope. All to save the poor girl time. I say if she is too busy to write her own envelopes, she is too busy to have a shower.

Let's all remember that gift registries are a gimmick of department stores to ensure that gifts are purchased from that store.

I say keep the purse, and give the Bride $20 in a gift envelope!

[NanciJ]

If this were a personal shower for the bride, then I can see more where the bag might be a consideration. This sounds as though it's a general bridal shower, and the bride has,( or the couple has) registered items that the couple would like to have for their new life together. Couples register because it's generally easier for the gift giver, as well as the couple to select items that they need and hope to receive.