Fashion

[FunkyHulaGirl]

Hi girls! It's another icky, rainy day...more of the same is forecast through the weekend.    Very depressing...

Angelica is next to me on the couch, gnawing away at a bone, which is a surprise. Normally she doesn't chew on things she's supposed to, but does chew on anything and everything she's not supposed to. It's hard for me to handle her, as she's so strong; she's overweight because she doesn't get enough exercise, but she doesn't do well on the leash - she pulls on me, then I end up achy.

The handyman didn't get back to me so I sent him a PM; he replied that his back is hurting - he had surgery a few months ago.  Thanks for letting me know!   Well, I'll give him until the weekend to do the tub knobs; if not, I have a master plumber who does work on the side that I'll have to call - he's not as cheap as the handyman, but still reasonable. As for the air ducts, fortunately it's still pretty warm out. What ever happened to showing up to work and taking responsibility?

My heart goes out to you, LindaL.  I remember how utterly exhausted I was from taking care of my late husband 24/7, but it was only for 50 days, and I was much younger at the time.  Please take care of yourself! I'm praying for you.  You too, twinny. I know elderly people are resistant to change, but my former MIL came to love the nursing home we put her in...and it was a huge relief for us. She might well come to love assisted living.

Jean, my donut needs replacing, but I just never got around to it, since my regular mechanic doesn't carry them. We have DOT trucks here that help with road emergencies and problems, but I also have roadside assistance from my insurance company that costs me all of 50¢ a month.  I've used it three times - twice for a dead battery and once for a tow when I had that blowout last month - so it's been well worth it.

Well, I got my office somewhat organized...I didn't feel like sweeping, so maybe I'll do that after dinner.

I contacted Amazon via email for the latest problem and got another non-answer, just apologies.  DO NOT buy the latest version of the Kindle - it's junk! I'm going to write a scathing review of it... 

Hi to everyone; have a blessed evening.

[twinny70]

Just checking in to say that I am quiite frazzled from mom's meeting late this afternoon.  My brother joined me along with a RN, PT/OT & one of the administrator's from her care facility.  They say she needs 24/7 help & she says she can go home with maybe an hour or so a day of help.  They asked her if she would go with us to look at one of the assisted living places in town & she thought that they meant a few hours in her home with some help.  She then said absolutely not going to look at a couple of them.  I mentioned her getting the washer moved upstairs into her spare bedroom & she said again absolutely not.  Then they said that she is unable to do all of her pills at the correct time & they suggested that a local pharmacy would give her a pill box for a week's worth for $2.00 & she threw a fit about paying $2 a week to get her pills put into a box for her.  She was adamant that she had a real good system at home for taking her pills on time.  I suggested she get help maybe 3 hours each morning & again late in the day for another 3 hours. Another NO. She also told all of them that she didn't like to use the walker which says 24/7 & she very sneekily goes about her business without it if she knows that she can get away with out using it.  The only thing that she said that she would do would be get life line again.  I will not hook that up again so that will be my brother's job,  I had a heck of a time two years ago when I got it hooked up for her.  Tomorrow morning there will be an assessment of her home to see what she needs for safety purposes.  DH & I will go to her Manor & get her & the social worker will follow us to her home for about an hour to see what needs to be done different in her home.  Wish me luck.  Thank you so much for listening to me tonight.

[PAlady]

Twinny -  Sorry the meeting didn't go as well as you had hoped.  I will put this out there and I don't mean to sound unkind.  If she insists on doing it her way, you may have to let her.  Just remember, she is responsible for her actions, not you or your brother. 

You may remind her that if she falls she may never be vertical again (end up on a nursing home in a bed).   My Grandfather was very stubborn and paid the price for always doing things "his way".    I hope I did not over step here, I wish you all the best of luck.

[LindaLatte]

I'm so sorry, twinny.  Your Mom is certainly stubborn.  I guess you can't do anything to change her mind, but what a burden this puts on you.  Praying for you.

Thanks to all of you for your concern.  Last night wasn't great -- DH was up three or four times, and I had to get up three times.  No accidents this morning, but as some of you read, he ended up collapsing on our walk.  It was very strange -- he suddenly started walking very fast.  I had trouble keeping up with him, which is the opposite of normal.  Then, he was sweating profusely, and told me to slow down.  I told him he was the one walking so fast, but he kept going.  I was holding his hand, and I realized he was about to fall down, so I helped him go to the ground. But, he could not get up.  A neighbor saw me struggling, and the two of us finally got him up, and got one of his shoes back on (it had fallen off).  We very very close to home, and I helped him get there.  But, I was concerned about him.  

I thought the mobile urgent care (nurse practitioner) would be a good one to call, but the Fire Department said she was busy until 11:00, and I should call 911.  A bunch of EMTs/Firemen came, and did tests, etc.  They said he should go to the hospital.  I had just read in the newspaper that the new hospital is not taking our insurance yet (I think next week they will), so he had to go to the old hospital about 45 miles away.  They took him in the ambulance, and told me to take my time getting there, and I did so.  Took a shower, called his DD and mine, etc.  His DD was working, but she eventually called back.

Anyway, they did all sorts of tests, and they could not find anything wrong.  It took quite a while for him to be released (almost 2:00 in the afternoon), and I was starving.  I'm always starving at lunchtime.  So, we stopped and had some Chinese food.  He is tired, but seems okay.  I'm tired, but okay as well.

As long as he is okay tomorrow morning, I plan to take him to the "club", and I'll go to the gym which I planned to do today.  I also missed my volunteer job today.

The good news is that DD is feeling much better, the medicine really helped.

Glad you didn't have any serious problems with the tire, Jean.  I don't think I would do well in a sleep study either, but I think it is probably a good idea for you to have one.

Sleep well everyone!

Hugs,

Linda

[Snicks1]

LL, what a day you have had. Glad you are both ok, but how scary that must have been for you both. I do hope you get some rest tonight and that tomorrow is a much better day.

twinny, sorry about your stressful day also.

[twinny70]

SUSAN, You are not stepping out of bounds on your advice to me.  I want to do the right thing but it is hard for me to see her make these very poor decision about doing everything by herself with little or no help.  We went this same route 3 years ago.  Even my brother told our mom that she needs help & cannot go home & do it all by herself.  One of the PT's told me today that mom tells them every day that she has the stove on at home.   They took her to the kitchen & she was to make pudding.  First off she cannot read the directions & they say that she should not be near a stove.  Then they told her to put the pudding where it belonged after making it & it went back into the microwave.  LINDA L, So sorry for your DH's fall today.  I am praying that things will work out better for all of you.  CERB, Good job at getting 2nd place on the Halloween costumes.    JEAN, Good job that your tire came off where you had fairly quickly.  We have only had to go the donut route once many years while vacationing in CO.  FHG, Maybe Angelica will start being a little tamer & not eat what she shouldn't.  We are getting rain but really need it.  She would definitely be hard to walk on a leash at that much weight.

[sydsgma1]

Twinny..I will put my 2 cents in having gone through this exact same thing with my mom.in our case the social worker told her she could not go home and be by herself. She had dementia and I could have had her committed to a care facility...but we did not have to do that.

you may have to let her pay the consequences. As hard as it is on you. I am surprised the care facility is letting her go....

(((((((hugs)))))

[Bird mama]

I'm just getting back to the thread.  I am so sorry Linda about the events the led to the hospital experience.  To say that you have your hands full is an understatement.  

Twinny, perhaps once the folks from the facility check out your mom's house, they may determine that she can't go home.  In Michigan a social worker can overrule a patient if the conditions aren't safe for the patient.  I feel for your mother because I am fiercely independent.  I pray that God takes me before I am ever in that position.  That said, you and DH are not equipped to give her the care she needs.  

It's not a sign of neglect or lack of love or devotion.  I say this to LindaL and Twinny.  Neither of you should feel guilt.  There's no other way for me to say this other than it takes a village to be able to care for a declining loved one at home.  If there isn't a group of folks to rotate the care and provide respite, the caregiver will burn out.