Fashion

[LindaLatte]

Sending hugs your way, Gayle.  I can relate about not visiting with family.  In fact, I did not see my daughter and family for two years due to my husband's illness.  Really hope that you find ways to take care of yourself while taking care of your DH.  

[Bird mama]

Gayle @Gayle2   I would say that my role as caregiver was defined by what my husband would allow or accept.

In a nutshell - he wanted no one else but me.  He didn't want his grown children to visit.  To be truthful he didn't want his grown children to know about his illness.  He didn't want a neighbor or one of my sisters to sit with him if I needed to run an errand.

If your husband is open to buddies, neighbors or family coming over to visit with him for a couple of hours and you get the opportunity to take off and do something for yourself - take advantage of it.

[LindaLatte]

I am so sorry that you had to deal with those sorts of issues when you were a caregiver, Bernie.  One of the reasons I have found the caregivers group I have participated in for several years is being able to share those sorts of struggles with others who can understand like others who have not been caregivers really cannot do.  No fault of theirs,  I remember some members talking about how frustrated they would become with their husbands or parents and then feeling so guilty knowing that it was certainly no lack of love on either side -- husbands who were frightened and/or were suffering from dementia, etc.  I know some people are not comfortable with sharing, but I find it wonderful to have others who understood and accept..