Fashion

[Ibby114]

I wish you and your family all the best, I jsut went through this last month. My Dad wasn't on life support - but he decided 'no more dialysis' the day Joan Rivers died. Every day was 'wait and see'- jump every time the phone rang, etc. What's best for your MIL's comfort is what matters most, hopefully everyone will realize that in time.

[KathyPet]

Brother in law who says he has POA should be able to produce the signed, notarized copy. Also there are two types of POA one might sign. You can give someone a medical power of attorney which enables them to make decisions about their medical care including end of life decisions. There is a separate POA which covers legal and financial decisions and actions. remember a POA ceases upon death. As soon as your MIL passes away the POA IS NOT VALID. The will then becomes the document that must be followed and the executor of the will takes over

[JustJazzmom]

On 10/17/2014 KathyPet said: Brother in law who says he has POA should be able to produce the signed, notarized copy. Also there are two types of POA one might sign. You can give someone a medical power of attorney which enables them to make decisions about their medical care including end of life decisions. There is a separate POA which covers legal and financial decisions and actions. remember a POA ceases upon death. As soon as your MIL passes away the POA IS NOT VALID. The will then becomes the document that must be followed and the executor of the will takes over

POA is a general term but POA can be written to be specific for certain things and for a specific time period. Wills should be original with the raised seal-- hopefully its not in a safe deposit box (unless its a jointly owned box with another member of the family). A safety deposit box gets sealed by the bank when a person dies and an original death certificate and a letter of testamentary from the Probate court for the excutor/executrix should be handed to the bank to open that box. Usually an attorney will ask the probate court for a will call of the contents of a safety deposit box and if a will is found, it is the responsibility of the bank to turn it over to the Probate court.

If your MIL has a will, and its with an attorney, the attorney should be contacted and an appointment made once the will is found so that the estate attorney can start the Probate process. HTH.

[JustJazzmom]

When you have that initial appointment with an estate attorney who has the original will, an original death certificate should be handed over to the attorney-- who then hands that and the will over to the Probate court. There will be other forms to fill out or sign/notarize before the will goes to probate. If there are several executors, each one must sign/notarize those forms and send them back to the estate attorney.

Also at that initial appointment a statement listing all of the assets of that person might be needed because that gets turned over to the court. If she owns a house. a realtor should do an appraisal of that house as close as possible to the death of your MIL because a house is considered an asset of the estate.

[Ibby114]

On 10/17/2014 JustJazzmom said:

When you have that initial appointment with an estate attorney who has the original will, an original death certificate should be handed over to the attorney-- who then hands that and the will over to the Probate court. There will be other forms to fill out or sign/notarize before the will goes to probate. If there are several executors, each one must sign/notarize those forms and send them back to the estate attorney.

Also at that initial appointment a statement listing all of the assets of that person might be needed because that gets turned over to the court. If she owns a house. a realtor should do an appraisal of that house as close as possible to the death of your MIL because a house is considered an asset of the estate.

Every state has different laws, policies and procedures, I'm going through this exact process right now. I was financial POA and now am Executrix. A lawyer did the will but I held onto it- I met with the probate court and gave them the will (no lawyer needed) and started the probate process. It seems pretty straight forward- and I have a contact at the probate court if/when questions and concerns arise.

[prisrob]

Ask for an Ehics Committee consult to help sort out all the issues. Every hospital has to have one. They will talk to everyone and make recommendations.

[colliegirls]

So sorry.

[goodstuff]

I am sorry for your MIL's condition. If someone in the family has medical Power of Attorney for her, they can consult with the doctors and make the call. Otherwise, you'll probably need to wait until her children reach an agreement or the doctors pronounce her dead. So sad and painful for everyone in the family, potentially a cause of lasting family discord, and a reminder of how important it is to have final wishes and POA settled and in place before a situation like this occurs.

As to how long she might live if taken off life support.......it just depends. Generally not long -- but sometimes patients will surprise you. You really never know.

[Nuttmeg]

My prayers are with you and your family.