I am a saver, help! - Page 2

Pearlee · ‎06-11-2011

scotnovel wrote:
My MIL did this.

I wonder if this is a generational thing, perhaps from people who did live through The Great Depression as my mother did. Could very well be. And then those habits are passed down, as they were to me from my mom until I overcame them.

2blonde · ‎03-10-2010

Maybe by making such a purchase, a person is attempting to fulfill the dream of going to that "special" event or occasion? Am I making sense....?

Laura loves cats!

Reba055 · ‎06-23-2014

@scotnovel wrote:
My MIL did this. She would always say I'll save this for "good". Whenshe died we found virtually all of the presents we had bought her during the past eight years of our marriage - pretty robes, linens, tops, new dishes, etc. All were in their original boxes and had never been touched. It was kind of insulting in a way and a big waste of money. However, it was so very sad that for whatever reason she didn't feel worthy of nice things or was afraid of another depression so she couldn't bring herself to use something that she might "need" later. Almost all went to charities when she died so hopefully someone finally got to use them.

Honestly, it sounds like you might need some counseling to figure out why you are saving these items. Is there a thrill in buying (likes some hoarders have)? Do you think you are unworthy of using nice things or just something new? Are you too focused on trends that you just buy when you don't really need new items? Are you somehow ashamed of spending the money and don't want people/spouse to know you bought something new so you don't wear it?

I've never done anything like that. I wear things that I save, lol, within that season, or next. Pretty much since I live in FL, we wear a lot year round. I don't buy a lot of winter clothes. I hate winter. Anyway, I wear plenty of new purchases. I don't think saving something for a cruise is weird. Many people I know pick up things and save for vacations.

Maybe I'm missing something, but I don't know that the OP has a real problem. i bought a pair of leather knee high boots last year (prob March) for $20 and "saved" them for this winter. Actually this has become my preferred way of clothes shopping. Just bought several Nikki Poulis dresses that were marked down (half) that I will wear this spring. I know what I like, what I will wear, and have figured out how to get the best deals. So there are things that I bought that I'm not wearing right now.

ANewHue · ‎11-21-2011

@Pearlee I wondered the same thing but I don't think so. My mother was guilty of this but none of her siblings were and they were very close in age. I had Aunts that were fashionistas in their day and dyed their hair well into their 90's and wore makeup, not my mother.

scotnovel · ‎12-31-2013

@Reba055 wrote:
@scotnovel wrote:
My MIL did this. She would always say I'll save this for "good". Whenshe died we found virtually all of the presents we had bought her during the past eight years of our marriage - pretty robes, linens, tops, new dishes, etc. All were in their original boxes and had never been touched. It was kind of insulting in a way and a big waste of money. However, it was so very sad that for whatever reason she didn't feel worthy of nice things or was afraid of another depression so she couldn't bring herself to use something that she might "need" later. Almost all went to charities when she died so hopefully someone finally got to use them.

Honestly, it sounds like you might need some counseling to figure out why you are saving these items. Is there a thrill in buying (likes some hoarders have)? Do you think you are unworthy of using nice things or just something new? Are you too focused on trends that you just buy when you don't really need new items? Are you somehow ashamed of spending the money and don't want people/spouse to know you bought something new so you don't wear it?
I've never done anything like that. I wear things that I save, lol, within that season, or next. Pretty much since I live in FL, we wear a lot year round. I don't buy a lot of winter clothes. I hate winter. Anyway, I wear plenty of new purchases. I don't think saving something for a cruise is weird. Many people I know pick up things and save for vacations.

Maybe I'm missing something, but I don't know that the OP has a real problem. i bought a pair of leather knee high boots last year (prob March) for $20 and "saved" them for this winter. Actually this has become my preferred way of clothes shopping. Just bought several Nikki Poulis dresses that were marked down (half) that I will wear this spring. I know what I like, what I will wear, and have figured out how to get the best deals. So there are things that I bought that I'm not wearing right now.

I think there is a difference in what you are doing and what the OP said. We all likely have bought something now for a later event or trip and then used it. I interprested what she was saying as she buys them for an event but then "saves" them and doesn't wear them because as she said they aren't "fresh".

kzjohnson · ‎12-15-2011

Saving the "good stuff" for a special occasion. I used to do that because that's what I was taught by my mother. Then I heard someone mention that life isn't a dress rehearsal so live it the best way you can.

Now, I will eat my Saturday night popcorn out of a Waterford bowl. And there are days I get up and have a big old day of movie watching planned, so I'll drag out the super nice Kilronan sweater, put makeup on and do my hair. I do it for me because I like the stuff I have and worked hard to get it, so I might as well enjoy it.

You never know what life can throw at you and that special occasion may not happen.

Pearlee · ‎06-11-2011

@kzjohnson wrote:
Saving the "good stuff" for a special occasion. I used to do that because that's what I was taught by my mother. Then I heard someone mention that life isn't a dress rehearsal so live it the best way you can.

Now, I will eat my Saturday night popcorn out of a Waterford bowl. And there are days I get up and have a big old day of movie watching planned, so I'll drag out the super nice Kilronan sweater, put makeup on and do my hair. I do it for me because I like the stuff I have and worked hard to get it, so I might as well enjoy it.
You never know what life can throw at you and that special occasion may not happen.

@kzjohnson and @ANewHue Inhteresting that you too learned it from your mother as I did. I think it is a generational thing, even though all children don't necessarily have to "learn" that lesson from their moms.

Groaning at the unintended pun: "Then I heard someone mention that life isn't a dress rehearsal so live it the best way you can."

Another new name Sue · ‎03-11-2010

sia, you need to wear your new things for a couple of reasons. Remember, clothing lasts a long, long time if you take good care of it. So if you wear it a few times before a special event, it will still look fresh when you wear it for the intended event. Also, it's good to give things a trial run. Maybe something with the garment won't work, need to wear a different bra for example. Finally, it feels so good to have something fresh and new on instead of the same old same old.

April of NY · ‎11-20-2013

Thanks for replying!

April of NY · ‎11-20-2013

Thanks! I'm looking for behavior modification solutions. I'm impatient and lack focus, and would grow wearisome talking in a counseling solution. But good advice none the less!