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Honored Contributor
Posts: 8,654
Registered: ‎06-25-2012

Re: Clothes Associated With Bad Memories

When my mom died I really had nothing to wear to her days of viewing and her funeral. I quickly went out and bought some clothes to wear. I never could wear those clothes again. Donated them right away. 

"Pure Michigan"
Honored Contributor
Posts: 15,895
Registered: ‎03-09-2010

Re: Clothes Associated With Bad Memories

I would like to add this to this thread, I found a piece of clothing associated with a sweet memory.

I am in the process of packing up my folks apt and hanging in the front closet I found a beige, blue and red Koret of California Jacket that my Mom wore to leave for her honeymoon 8-31-52

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Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 5,992
Registered: ‎03-09-2010

Re: Clothes Associated With Bad Memories

Interesting.... I don't have clothes that I associate with bad memories, but I do have a few items that remind me of good and happy experiences, and those I keep at the far end of my closet or at the bottom of a drawer.  I'll probably never wear them again, but I can't part with them either.

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- Eleanor Roosevelt
Honored Contributor
Posts: 17,739
Registered: ‎03-09-2010

Re: Clothes Associated With Bad Memories

[ Edited ]

If something was really upsetting for me ,I would get rid of it. I just wouldn't do that to myself.. Someone will be happy to have the item

Honored Contributor
Posts: 25,929
Registered: ‎03-09-2010

Re: Clothes Associated With Bad Memories

When a big, negative event is going on in my life - what I'm wearing is the least of what is on my mind! For a million dollars I couldn't tell you what I was wearing when my husband died , or my father. Now my Mom - I was at work when I was told she had died , so I know I had scrubs on.

Honored Contributor
Posts: 12,366
Registered: ‎03-13-2010

Re: Clothes Associated With Bad Memories


@151949 wrote:

When a big, negative event is going on in my life - what I'm wearing is the least of what is on my mind! For a million dollars I couldn't tell you what I was wearing when my husband died , or my father. Now my Mom - I was at work when I was told she had died , so I know I had scrubs on

 

@151949

Same here. I was at both parents’ bedsides when they died, and I have no idea what I was wearing. I have also been a soloist at many funerals for loved ones, and again, I don’t remember what I wore when I was singing. I still have a few things that belonged to loved ones that bring back memories. They are in my curio or jewelry box.

Honored Contributor
Posts: 43,847
Registered: ‎01-08-2011

Re: Clothes Associated With Bad Memories

I don't keep anything tied to a memory that robs joy and peace from me.  I'm SO visual, every time I pass anything, the item's history flys through my mind.

Honored Contributor
Posts: 13,020
Registered: ‎11-01-2010

Re: Clothes Associated With Bad Memories

@Greeneyedlady21

 

I don’t associate clothes with bad (or good) memories. They are just clothes to me. I have no idea what I was wearing when my mother was in the hospital and passed away. Clothes worn to funerals get worn other places, too. 

Regular Contributor
Posts: 185
Registered: ‎07-30-2010

Re: Clothes Associated With Bad Memories

Everything has an energy about it ... so, contemplate the item, turn it over in your hand, look at it and feel the emotions that it brings up.  If it evokes good, warm feelings and memories, then hold onto it.  If the opposite, then donate it.

 

In my closet, deep in my closet, are the top and vest I wore when I held my dear, sweet dog in my arms and he passed.  To me, there is something sacred about those articles of clothing ... I will never give them away but I will probably never wear them again either.  

 

It all depends on the association that item carries.  Do what feels right to you.

Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 5,358
Registered: ‎07-17-2010

Re: Clothes Associated With Bad Memories

I still wear the shirt I was wearing when my dad died.  It occurs to me when I'm putting it on that it's that shirt, but then I put it on and I don't think about it.

 

The dress and shoes I wore to his memorial are items I don't even like, so there's no reason to keep them.  The shoes I want to sell, but haven't gotten around to it.  The dress wouldn't be worth much, so I think I will donate it.

 

Usually when I have bad memories associated with something, I remind myself that my feelings about that thing can be changed or softened.  So if I really liked the thing before it was "tainted," I try to create new memories with it, or I use it a lot to "water down" the bad memories.  Seems to work most of the time.  If it doesn't, then it's probably time for me to donate or sell the item.



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