Fashion

[kittymomNC]

On 9/17/2014 Nancy Drew said:

Mom jeans, mom heels, when did the word Mom become a diss? So I guess Mom's are suppose to be in the hot shoes, how exhausting.

So you won't have to go back and read through all these posts, this is the history of the Mom Jeans:

There was a saying in a skit on Saturday Night Live with Tina Fey that brought this to the forefront and really made it a term to be used to describe this style of jeans. It was "I'm not a woman anymore...I'm a Mom!" So I don't like this term as Mom Jeans or Mom Heels.... This is the definition of "Mom jeans"....Refer to post #93 or 97 for pictures.....

mom jeans

high-waisted, unfashionable jeans commonly worn by middle-aged mothers.

Women’s jeans of a style regarded as unfashionable or unflattering

[danny1990]

great post, i like.

[frankjac]

On 9/13/2014 sidsmom said:

All but a couple missed the point. I LOVE flats! The perpendicular lines creates a dressier look to the eye. Softer lines equate to casual...very, very casual.

Unfortunately "don't buy the shoe" is becoming harder & harder to achieve. More & more designers are going for that softer design.

I have to add....I'm seeing the Mom Heel in high-heeled shoes/boots, as well.

good!

[Moonlady]

There are a lot of shoes styled like the two pictured (and many more), but "mom shoes" is an odd moniker for any of them. In fact, I love heels, but I'm taller and like being able to wear shorter heels, loafers, ballet slippers without sacrificing height. It's called "choice."

[luvingit]

Don't like those ugly heels either. They are like Moms or maybe grandma? There is chic comfort and then there's frumpy comfort.

[Fitzallen]

I'm turning a small issue into a large issue...but I think it really is important:

No idea how old the OP is and she certainly didn't invent the description "mom's" to refer to fashion that is less haute and more comfort. But either way, I'm reasonably sure that term is not really dissing motherhood but instead to diss people who are either aging or are getting to a point in life where practicality and comfort, for whatever reason, rules "hotty" mentality.

So, there are two options. We either age, or we die. Most people prefer the former.

No one age 25 can imagine themselves at 45. And no one at 45 imagines themselves at 65. And so it goes. When you reach those "upper" ages, you still can't believe you are of that age. I know this now being 53 and also know this from my mom who could not believe she was 60, then 70, then 80, and so on.

The small issue here is the shoe heel. Banning them is probably a joke but the truth is, if we got to ban every fashion and trend we didn't like, my list would be very, very, very long and most of it would include things "younger" people do and wear. Tattoos, pierced tongues and those bizarre skinny heels with the huge wedged fronts come to mind (Please don't take offense anyone...this is my taste and no insult is meant...its not right or wrong..it just is...). But I would not ban anything...if I don't like it, I don't wear it. And I don't really care what anyone else wears even when things I find really awful are in front of me all the time.

The larger issue is the dissing of the "mom's" stuff which I again believe is an age issue. Young women have NO idea what it is like to age as a woman in particular. You go from "hot" to zero in a lot of people's minds in what seems like overnight. Even if you, yourself feel like you look pretty good. Ouch. That hurts.

I wish there was a way to impart wisdom to young women. Don't call us "hens" and don't diss us because we need flat shoes that cover our bunions. Don't think because we are older we don't know anything. We DO. You will too at some point. Follow us...don't scoff at us. We know a little bit about life and we know a little bit about dressing and how our bodies will change over time...some slightly, some drastically. But they DO change. Trust me.

An older co-worker once told me she loved every decade because the older she got, the more she realized she was no longer a "player" and that stung her at first. Then she realized that allowed her the freedom to be who she wanted to be, to do what she wanted to do. She said each decade got better.

Being in my 50's, I now know what she meant. She was absolutely right.

[kittymomNC]

On 9/18/2014 Fitzallen said:

I'm turning a small issue into a large issue...but I think it really is important:

No idea how old the OP is and she certainly didn't invent the description "mom's" to refer to fashion that is less haute and more comfort. But either way, I'm reasonably sure that term is not really dissing motherhood but instead to diss people who are either aging or are getting to a point in life where practicality and comfort, for whatever reason, rules "hotty" mentality.

So, there are two options. We either age, or we die. Most people prefer the former.

No one age 25 can imagine themselves at 45. And no one at 45 imagines themselves at 65. And so it goes. When you reach those "upper" ages, you still can't believe you are of that age. I know this now being 53 and also know this from my mom who could not believe she was 60, then 70, then 80, and so on.

The small issue here is the shoe heel. Banning them is probably a joke but the truth is, if we got to ban every fashion and trend we didn't like, my list would be very, very, very long and most of it would include things "younger" people do and wear. Tattoos, pierced tongues and those bizarre skinny heels with the huge wedged fronts come to mind (Please don't take offense anyone...this is my taste and no insult is meant...its not right or wrong..it just is...). But I would not ban anything...if I don't like it, I don't wear it. And I don't really care what anyone else wears even when things I find really awful are in front of me all the time.

The larger issue is the dissing of the "mom's" stuff which I again believe is an age issue. Young women have NO idea what it is like to age as a woman in particular. You go from "hot" to zero in a lot of people's minds in what seems like overnight. Even if you, yourself feel like you look pretty good. Ouch. That hurts.

I wish there was a way to impart wisdom to young women. Don't call us "hens" and don't diss us because we need flat shoes that cover our bunions. Don't think because we are older we don't know anything. We DO. You will too at some point. Follow us...don't scoff at us. We know a little bit about life and we know a little bit about dressing and how our bodies will change over time...some slightly, some drastically. But they DO change. Trust me.

An older co-worker once told me she loved every decade because the older she got, the more she realized she was no longer a "player" and that stung her at first. Then she realized that allowed her the freedom to be who she wanted to be, to do what she wanted to do. She said each decade got better.

Being in my 50's, I now know what she meant. She was absolutely right.

Very well said, Fitzallen. I found out that a lot of the "Mom Jean" mentality refers back to the high-waisted loose fitting jeans of a couple of decades ago, and the remark on SNL about the jeans, "I'm not a woman anymore, I'm a Mom"!

Another part of this equation or "conversation" as the case may be, is the constant threads calling this or that designer's clothes "frumpy", "matronly", etc. and "no one but old women would be seen in these hideous things." I can't count the number of times I've seen remarks and words like that on these forums. And some of those who make these statements purport to be "old" themselves.

I don't think it's necessary to be insulting, as I think a lot of these statements are. As you say, if given a preference, most people would prefer getting "older" to the alternative. Just because we age in numbers of years, does not mean we age in our desire to be fashionable and look good. And someday, those who do equate "older" to frumpy and matronly will hopefully learn something about that old saying "I'm not getting older, I'm getting better!"

[baddest_dog]

OTOH, there are soooo many good things about getting older. Like:

I have the freedom to do what I want when I want

I worked long and hard to put a tidy sum away for my retirement and now if I feel like taking a whole day on a beautiful fall day to go apple picking or flea marketing, I can do that

I don't have to worry about shoveling my driveway to get to work on time

I am not stressed anymore because I am on my own timeline

I didn't wear makeup all summer, except for lipstick which I think is an essential, and because I don't have to "dress to impress", my wardrobe choices are cute and comfortable but not a strain on my finances. And my skin looks great having gone without any makeup.

I am happy being me, not trying to please my boss, my co-workers, or anyone else.

And on top of all that, I saw a new doctor the other day who before she looked at my chart said "how old are you again" and I said 64, she did a quick turn of the head and said "I would never have guessed anything beyond 50.

So all in all, I will wear my comfortable shoes, jeans that flatter my body, my Target t-shirts and not really care what anyone else thinks.

[luvingit]

Well, now I jump in with my two cents. I have seen well dressed BEAUTIFUL women 60s and older. They dressed like they care and it looks it. The majority of older women do not look good. Why does this happen? Is it a self image thing? Have they given up on appearances? You say when you are older, you earn the right to not care what others think? But what do you think? Do you look good at this age when you dress or do you look like you put on the most comfortable baggy pants and tops? Clothes when you were younger you would never worn. I believe that at any age you can wear pants made out of a nice fabric and the tops can look lux, chic with beautiful accessories. Look at how beautiful Joan Rivers always looked. She dressed with care because she was older. I say the same thing; everything on our bodies are going south, and this is the time in our lives to dress even better, not worse. Now I already know some of you will jump on me about knowing what is good looking and what is not. The answer is it is a matter of taste. Good taste.

[kittymomNC]

On 9/18/2014 baddest_dog said:

OTOH, there are soooo many good things about getting older. Like:

I have the freedom to do what I want when I want

I worked long and hard to put a tidy sum away for my retirement and now if I feel like taking a whole day on a beautiful fall day to go apple picking or flea marketing, I can do that

I don't have to worry about shoveling my driveway to get to work on time

I am not stressed anymore because I am on my own timeline

I didn't wear makeup all summer, except for lipstick which I think is an essential, and because I don't have to "dress to impress", my wardrobe choices are cute and comfortable but not a strain on my finances. And my skin looks great having gone without any makeup.

I am happy being me, not trying to please my boss, my co-workers, or anyone else.

And on top of all that, I saw a new doctor the other day who before she looked at my chart said "how old are you again" and I said 64, she did a quick turn of the head and said "I would never have guessed anything beyond 50.

So all in all, I will wear my comfortable shoes, jeans that flatter my body, my Target t-shirts and not really care what anyone else thinks.

All that, except I do usually wear a little makeup when I go out. Never had skin problems when I was a teenager or my whole life, but now I have rosacea and a little redness, so I put on a little Bare Minerals and it does the job. I was lucky to have inherited my Mom's "Genes" (pun intended) and no one believes me when I tell them how old I am. I don't have to buy "dress" clothes anymore, so I have a whole new wardrobe of cute tops, jeans, boots, capris, wedge sandals, etc. which is fun!

And if I want to make a quick run to the home improvement store when I'm in the middle of yard work or some other project, I throw on a decent tee shirt, run a comb through my hair, put on my sunglasses and pray I don't run into anyone I know! But if I do, I wouldn't get embarrassed like I would have when I was younger. I've worked hard all my life, raised a son by myself, and I deserve to live and dress however I want now, and it's certainly not frumpy!!

Edited to add: I probably dress better now than when I was younger in some cases, because back then, raising a son alone with no child support and no help, I couldn't always afford many of the clothes I would have liked. So every age has its good parts and its bad parts, but right now I'm finding more good parts!