Need Tech Help: Direct Access to Download Files D... - Page 2

glb613 · ‎03-09-2010

@sfnative wrote:
@Kachina624
@glb613
@DearPrudence
@LTT1

Honestly, I was hoping for an answer, not a lecture on backing up, etc.

Let me admit to a horrible dynamic I've been dealing with for more years than I wish to admit, which has become worse and which had caused me to take action toward "leaving."

My husband has declared himself the "keeper" of all things relative to computers. This includes thumb drives, a drive he has interfacing with his computer, a myriad of other stuff, including the brand new laptop my daughter, sil and granddaughter gave me for mother's day. Yes, he absconded with my gift.

I am beside myself with grief about living with this alcoholic and now the issue with my downloaded files, as I'm establishing a new online business and need these files. I'm going to purchase a flash drive with lots of memory and get these puppies on it.

In the meantime, me getting away from this place, finding a new very cheap place to live, an atty, etc., is going to take a while, as it's difficult getting chances to make calls and such, as I'm grounded from driving due to a fractured ankle and foot.

I was trying to help not get a lecture about how I'm suppose to know about your home life when reading your question. It is a perfect example of why all of us need to back up or save our data on a regular basis. I'm sorry you're having problems but how about next time either tell the whole story or take from the answer what you need and ignore the rest.

LTT1 · ‎03-09-2010

@sfnative

You can notify me if you ever want somebody”moral support.”

Meanwhile,

I will be thinking kind and gentle thoughts for you, because you are fighting a hard battle. 💗😢💗

Take good care, friend.😘

~Have a Kind Heart, Fierce Mind, Brave Spirit~

aroc3435 · ‎09-30-2010

@sfnative. I'm the least tech savvy person so can't help with that. In terms of the spousal situation I have had a somewhat similar experience in the early 80's and was trapped with two very young children, infant and toddler. On top of that, wasn't working anymore--at his insistence--and did not drive. He took over the finances completely--and that was the crowning blow that motivated me to finally leave, after toying with the sad idea of doing so for many, many months.

You ARE dealing with a lot in terms of legal, new inexpensive rent to find, etc. None of that will be easy for you. I wouldn't put anything you don't want him to see on your computer (or smart phone if you have one) in terms of your exit strategy. Ask someone you trust outside of his access to do some of the legwork re legal, new place to live for you, etc.

You will be kept in my thoughts and prayers. Stay strong and be positive about yourself. Have patience. You've dealt with unhappy circumstances for probably a long time, so take your time so your exit will do the least damage to you, financially and emotionally. You WILL succeed and be the better for it.

LTT1 · ‎03-09-2010

@aroc3435

Thank you for posting your story.

You May never know how many you have helped.💗

~Have a Kind Heart, Fierce Mind, Brave Spirit~

sfnative · ‎03-10-2010

@aroc3435 wrote:
@sfnative. I'm the least tech savvy person so can't help with that. In terms of the spousal situation I have had a somewhat similar experience in the early 80's and was trapped with two very young children, infant and toddler. On top of that, wasn't working anymore--at his insistence--and did not drive. He took over the finances completely--and that was the crowning blow that motivated me to finally leave, after toying with the sad idea of doing so for many, many months.

You ARE dealing with a lot in terms of legal, new inexpensive rent to find, etc. None of that will be easy for you. I wouldn't put anything you don't want him to see on your computer (or smart phone if you have one) in terms of your exit strategy. Ask someone you trust outside of his access to do some of the legwork re legal, new place to live for you, etc.

You will be kept in my thoughts and prayers. Stay strong and be positive about yourself. Have patience. You've dealt with unhappy circumstances for probably a long time, so take your time so your exit will do the least damage to you, financially and emotionally. You WILL succeed and be the better for it.

@aroc3435

Thanks so much for your kind words of encouragement and advice.

Cell phones: I now have 2. Both are iPhones. My old one requires a passcode, which he doesn't have. The 2nd one is new and was given to my by my daughter. It has that thumbprint feature to open it up, plus, if it's been off, also requires a 6 digit password. He cannot get into either. On my laptop, all is deleted, to keep his eyes away from it, as he must use my computer to pay our monthly bank bill, as nearly all purchases go through one bank card. etc. etc.

I've recently spoken with the social worker at my PCP's practice - she was not much help. But---the community services person was fabulous, providing me with many leads. My issue now is finding time and an excuse to be away on multiple occasions for hours at a time. There is no one who can do or help with any of this for me. My daughter bought me the phone and that's it. She cannot do any more - or won't do any more. I'm sort of beyond myself that I have no one to help. We've only lived here 5 years and the first 3 years, I was housebound with ulcerative colitis. In this city, making friends depends so much on one's political bent. It's all so disgusting I could throw up.

Thanks, again.