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Honored Contributor
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Registered: ‎03-13-2010

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CATS ARE HEAVEN SENT
Honored Contributor
Posts: 8,135
Registered: ‎11-16-2014

Re: so true

True to a certain extent but you need to learn to pick your battles wisely. There are times it is just not worth it and a person is better off retreating...

Honored Contributor
Posts: 10,417
Registered: ‎07-26-2014

Re: so true

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"Never argue with a fool. Onlookers may not be able to tell the difference."
Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 7,934
Registered: ‎03-09-2010

Re: so true

I guess I'm a pacifist, inside and out.

Honored Contributor
Posts: 25,929
Registered: ‎03-09-2010

Re: so true

Ever since my DH's stroke he nit picks at everything all day long! I will do almost anything to avoid listening to it. So thus - he ALWAYS gets his way.

Honored Contributor
Posts: 8,181
Registered: ‎05-23-2015

Re: so true

I have always hated confrontation, but I learned that if it is really important, I have to put on my big girl britches and fight the good fight. 

" You are entitled to your opinion. But you are not entitled to your own facts."
Daniel Patrick Moynihan
Respected Contributor
Posts: 2,522
Registered: ‎11-20-2013

Re: so true

[ Edited ]

I don't think that is avoiding the conflict. It's telling yourself you can't get what you want without a conflict ridden exchange that must be avoided for reasons you can't fully accept. That leaves you conflicted. There are so many different ways to rethink problems and their solutions.

Trusted Contributor
Posts: 1,507
Registered: ‎08-20-2012

Re: so true

151940 It must be difficult for you to deal with this every day. You are in my prayers. Try to take care of you. 

Honored Contributor
Posts: 28,491
Registered: ‎03-09-2010

Re: so true

@CATLOVER@indoor kitty@151949@deepwaterdotter@Mz iMac

 

Sometimes, not always, a situation needs to be addressed rather than confronted.

 

I do not think I was ever taught enough techniques to address situations where disagreements are imminent.

Instead, it seems much easier to retreat.

 

Instead, I need some counter-measures! lol 😂 

Have a Kind Heart, Fierce Mind, Brave Spirit
Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 7,642
Registered: ‎06-17-2015

Re: so true

I think this quote has value but the value is determined by how a person perceives his/her avoidance of conflict.

 

If avoided with resentment, then yes, an internal war can result.  Feelings of being used, feelings of disagreeing on the inside while smiling on the outside, feelings of not really trying to keep the peace but rather feeling inadequate and lacking the skills to deal with the conflict.

 

Conflict isn't necessarily a bad thing; it is how it is handled that will either resolve the situation or make it an all out battle.

 

This also depends upon if the conflict is on a personal level or if the conflict is being observed as an outsider.

 

 

" On the last day of the world I would want to plant a tree." -W.S. Merwin