Community Chat

[AuberriJean]

How do you decide if a lie is justifiable?

[JaneMarple]

When it comes to someone's feelings as to how do they look or do I like their outfit, then I will lie.

BTW, we've been down this road with this question before. Beware.

[Marp]

Within very narrow parameters a white lie can not only be acceptable but the right thing to do.  However, "do no harm" should be the first rule.

[AuberriJean]

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@JaneMarple wrote:

When it comes to someone's feelings as to how do they look or do I like their outfit, then I will lie.

BTW, we've been down this road with this question before. Beware.

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Lol! Ok, thanks! I didn't see other discussions, sorry for the re-run.

[Desertdi]

If somebody asks, "Do I look old?"     Of course, I would say, "Not at all".........(while probably thinking, "Ancient would be a better description").

I don't think it's charitable to hurt someone's feelings.

[JaneMarple]

I can't stand a liar and I told my kids while raising them that it was the worst thing that they could ever do to me. My middle daughter is just learning to cook at thirty (she had me or her two sisters to cook for her) and some of her creations are horrible but I don't let on and I still eat her creations.

[Mominohio]

For me, a white lie is only acceptable when someone asks you something trivial that the true answer may just be mean to give.

By that, I mean if a friend asks if you like their new sofa, or do their pants make them look fat, I can think of something positive to say, without hurting their feelings or lying big time. 

For the sofa, I might not say 'yes, I love it' when I don't, but would say something like 'I like how it compliments the rest of the room's decor'.  For the pants, I might try to do something similar, about how on trend they are or how well they compliment the shade of blue in their shirt. 

Now, big or important things aren't the same thing as a white lie, in my opinion, and I try never to get caught up in those, because they just seem to grow into a life of their own.

[jaxs mom]

Thank you I love the gift is perfectly acceptable, when you don't. 

[MyGirlsMom]

I watched a fascinating and sad PBS program last night about doctors telling patients about end of life issues.  There wee a few instances where the Physician told a white lie and in these circumstances, I agreed with them.

[Peaches McPhee]

A lie is perfectly acceptable if it is over something minor, or will save someone's feelings from being hurt.   I think being kind trumps a "never lie" rule.