Community Chat

[susankate]

WE HAD THE WONDERFUL PRIVILEGE OF HOSTING CHRISTMAS AT OUR HOME, ONCE AGAIN...HOWEVER, MY DAUGHTER AND FAMILY HAD MOVED 3 1/2 HOURS AWAY IN APRIL, AND THE DEPRESSION I SUFFERED WAS AWFUL...HOWEVER, ABOUT 6 MONTHS INTO IT, I WAS DOING BETTER...BUT THEY WERE HERE FOR 6 DAYS DURING CHRISTMAS...I HAD BEEN VERY BUSY GETTING EVERYTHING READY FOR OUR CELEBRATION, AND THEN AFTER THE WEEK WAS OVER, THEY TRAVELED BACK TO THEIR HOME...I AM NOW BACK WHERE I WAS...I'M SO LONELY FOR THEM I CAN HARDLY STAND IT...THEY HAVE GONE ON WITH THEIR LIVES (GLAD FOR THEM), AND I'M SITTING HERE EXHAUSTED AND DEPRESSED...ANY WISE WORDS FROM YOU, MY ONLINE FRIENDS?

[raven-blackbird]

a question................what was it about the visit that made you happy?........was it that you felt you had a purpose?....... that your family needed you again?........did you feel a sense of fulfillment?...................because IF it was one of those, you can get those same feelings from other areas.........................................................raven

[Jannabelle]

I agree, hold babies at the hospital, volunteer at a shelter if you love pets, etc ...but find something to do that makes you want to get up in the morning.

[Pqfan]

Hugs (((Susan Kate))) I hope you feel better.

[Mominohio]

I'm so sorry this is so hard for you, but you aren't alone in missing kids and grandkids, so please don't feel you are odd or isolated.

It sounds like you have a mate at home? If so, this is supposed to be the time for re connection and finding new interests with our SO. Is this already happening or possible for you?

Do you work outside the home, or have any outside interests, clubs, groups or church, and does that help fill the void, even if only some of the time?

This might sound dumb, but the more they come, then go home again, it will start to feel 'normal'. So can you arrange for them to visit more often? Can you take just the grandkids to come stay if only for a couple of days every couple of months? Can you make short visits to them, even if for just an overnighter every couple of months? This would always give you something to look forward to. Every time they leave, it will only be so many weeks or months till you are together again?

This is a really busy time for them, raising a family and probably working. Try not to push too much, or make them feel guilty about your feelings. I know it is hard, and I have the empty nest thing coming up soon in my life too, so I don't envy you.

Best wishes, and hope you are feeling better about the situation soon.

[muttmom]

On 12/30/2014 Jannabelle said: I agree, hold babies at the hospital, volunteer at a shelter if you love pets, etc ...but find something to do that makes you want to get up in the morning.

I've seen this comment a number of times on these threads. Where do hospitals allow strangers to hold babies?

When our grandchildren were born, we had to go through a thorough security check just to get on the maternity floor.

[raven-blackbird]

On 12/30/2014 muttmom said:

On 12/30/2014 Jannabelle said: I agree, hold babies at the hospital, volunteer at a shelter if you love pets, etc ...but find something to do that makes you want to get up in the morning.

I've seen this comment a number of times on these threads. Where do hospitals allow strangers to hold babies?

When our grandchildren were born, we had to go through a thorough security check just to get on the maternity floor.

generally it's in county hospital.......and you're a volunteer, think blue haired candy striper....................................................raven

[Snowpuppy]

This is not going to be of much help......but my holiday company is still here.

I was so glad when they arrived! Now they are overstaying, the weather is good here for a change. And while they are welcome anytime......I wanted some time to myself before I have to go back to work next week.

[Marp2]

Muttmom,

Not just anyone can be a "baby cuddler" or volunteer but many hospitals have programs for baby cuddlers.

Do a search on the term baby nursery volunteers and you will get a lot more hits than you could imagine.

[Jannabelle]

On 12/30/2014 muttmom said:

On 12/30/2014 Jannabelle said: I agree, hold babies at the hospital, volunteer at a shelter if you love pets, etc ...but find something to do that makes you want to get up in the morning.

I've seen this comment a number of times on these threads. Where do hospitals allow strangers to hold babies?

When our grandchildren were born, we had to go through a thorough security check just to get on the maternity floor.

I have always heard of volunteer programs where they need people just to hold babies, maybe this was back when there was less meaness in the world.....but there are always, always, always people in need that could use help........also maybe getting a pet to take care of might be good, for empty nesters?