Community Chat

[Candyapple]

@RazorSharp---- I couldn't agree more. Well said!

[Tinkrbl44]

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@MyShadowLove wrote:

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@CANDLEQUEEN wrote:

I once knew a guy that was married to a woman and they had a small child when the mother passed away very suddenly, and the man a short time later married her sister, now to me that was sooo crazy! 

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@CANDLEQUEEN....It could have been that, in his grief, he felt very connected to his wife through her sister and vice versa and they both found great solace and comfort in each other, as well as the child also...Human emotions are just too complex to pass judgment so quickly and grief is definitely the most difficult to go through...They all may have had a very wonderful, close relationship and the husband and sister reached out to each other during an extremely difficult time.

I just found your reply very interesting and this was the first thought that came to my mind that I wanted to share...I can see it happening with best friends also.

There are just so many variables when it comes to human behavior and emotions which I find very fascinating, so I hesitate to judge anyone without really knowing all that is involved. 

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@MyShadowLove

Very insightful response!

[Sooner]

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@Tinkrbl44 wrote:

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@stevieb wrote:

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@Sooner wrote:

I can see that redemption and second chances are not really big with this crowd.  Lots of perfect people huh????  ALWAYS is a long time. . . 

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Isn't that the truth, perfect... and with some pretty idealized versions of what love, relationships and people are really like and apparently little concept of what real life might sometimes throw out there...

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@stevieb    @Sooner

Boy, isn't that the truth!

For more than a decade, I facilitated divorce support groups and learned a great deal about what people go through and how they react.     

There are many things I could share, but one of the more common "generalizations" was when a woman is finished with a marriage, if determined, she can pack her bags and leave.  

When a man is finished with a marriage, it's highly unlikely he will just pack his bags and leave.   Usually, he will find someone to go to .... even if she is a short term relationship, and not the possible next Mrs. Him.     

Of course breaking up is much more complicated and it varies with the personalities of the people involved.   

Anyone who thinks "he should file for divorce before he cheats" should know that it's a great theory ... but it's not how real people behave in real life.   JMO

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It is stil true that in many cases the man has the higher salary, has the responsibility of many of the actions that "take care of" the woman and the family.  Maybe it is harder for the man to "just leave."  I'd guess that in many cases he would LOVE to leave, but is tied financially to his family.  I'd think in those cases it would be very difficult to just pick up and leave.

It is expensive to leave too if you are the one going to pay alimony.