Would you loan money to a friend or family member? - Page 2

Peaches McPhee · ‎04-19-2010

Probably yes. But I'd treat it as a gift, not a loan, so I am not upset when (if) it does not get paid back. If I can't afford to give it away, I would not lend it.

-- pro-aging --

Rochester, New York

sidsmom · ‎11-25-2011

Question:

What if they asked for $1000 & the next day they were sporting a new handbag & new clothes? Do you feel you have a say how they spend your lent money?

AnikaBrodie · ‎03-10-2010

Loan money to a family member? Never again. That is unless I don't care about getting it back some day.

Many years ago I loaned (she knew it was a loan) my older sister a substantial amount of money so she could move from another state back home. It also included money for attorney fees as she was divorcing her then husband and they had a young pre-school age daughter. She did not want the father to have visitation rights but had no valid legal reason for the request.

After several years of no payments, not even a small amount, I wrote it off thinking I would never get any money back, not even a partial payment. So, imagine my surprise when she mailed me partial payment for the loan over 25 years after the initial loan. Then, afterwards, she complained to another sister because I did not send her a thank you letter for the return of my money. I never could figure her logic on that ... my money, my loan.

Needless to say, I no longer have a good relationship with the sister in question. That is her fault, not mine. I will never loan her money again for any reason. She taught me that lesson well.

"Faith, Hope, Love; the greatest of these is Love." ~The Silver Fox~

bonnielu · ‎03-11-2010

I did once and to my surprise they paid it back in full. I didn't expect that to happen. I have not been approached again by anyone. My feeling is I would look at the situation, decide if I could afford it and then give not expecting any money back. We are now retired and I think I would have to be comfortable with the amount.

I never buy gifts for my family. I just give gift cards and let them pick what they need or want.

RedTop · ‎09-01-2010

It would totally depend on which friend, and which family member. Yes to the few who would even ask, as I would know it was a dire situation, and I would do what I could to help.

sunshine45 · ‎03-09-2010

@sidsmom wrote:
Question:
What if they asked for $1000 & the next day they were sporting a new handbag & new clothes? Do you feel you have a say how they spend your lent money?

how would i know how, where, and when or if they purchased them.....if they purchased them at all? i would not presume that they used the money for THAT. i loan the money and i dont second guess what they told me they needed it for.

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"The world is a dangerous place, not because of those who do evil, but because of those who look on and do nothing." - Albert Einstein

Preds · ‎12-17-2012

No.

Fate whispers to her, "You cannot withstand the storm." She whispers back, "I am the storm."

GCR18 · ‎07-03-2013

I've loaned money to a co-worker when they didn't have lunch money. That's the extent of what I'd loan.

shoekitty · ‎03-10-2010

I have to the kids, small amounts. When I have parted with large amounts, it was a gift, not a loan. Loaning money to friends and family can eat you alive.

I know a friend who did loan a friend of hers 10,000. She went to the bank, and made it like a loan. She had a payment book and everything drawn up. It was interest free to her friend. It worked out really well that way. Foe her anyway.

“sometimes you have to bite your upper lip and put sunglasses on”….Bob Dylan