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Respected Contributor
Posts: 4,341
Registered: ‎04-19-2010

Re: Would you loan money to a friend or family member?

Probably yes.  But I'd treat it as a gift, not a loan, so I am not upset when (if) it does not get paid back.  If I can't afford to give it away, I would not lend it.  


-- pro-aging --


Rochester, New York
Honored Contributor
Posts: 18,415
Registered: ‎11-25-2011

Re: Would you loan money to a friend or family member?

Question:

What if they asked for $1000 & the next day they were sporting a new handbag & new clothes?    Do you feel you have a say how they spend your lent money?

Honored Contributor
Posts: 21,385
Registered: ‎03-10-2010

Re: Would you loan money to a friend or family member?

Loan money to a family member?  Never again.  That is unless I don't care about getting it back some day.

 

Many years ago I loaned (she knew it was a loan) my older sister a substantial amount of money so she could move from another state back home.  It also included money for attorney fees as she was divorcing her then husband and they had a young pre-school age daughter.  She did not want the father to have visitation rights but had no valid legal reason for the request.

 

After several years of no payments, not even a small amount, I wrote it off thinking I would never get any money back, not even a partial payment.  So, imagine my surprise when she mailed me partial payment for the loan over 25 years after the initial loan.  Then, afterwards, she complained to another sister because I did not send her a thank you letter for the return of my money.  I never could figure her logic on that ... my money, my loan.

 

Needless to say, I no longer have a good relationship with the sister in question.  That is her fault, not mine.  I will never loan her money again for any reason.  She taught me that lesson well. 

"Faith, Hope, Love; the greatest of these is Love." ~The Silver Fox~
Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 7,199
Registered: ‎03-11-2010

Re: Would you loan money to a friend or family member?

I did once and to my surprise they paid it back in full.  I didn't expect that to happen.  I have not been approached again by anyone.  My feeling is I would look at the situation, decide if I could afford it and then give not expecting any money back.  We are now retired and I think I would have to be comfortable with the amount.  

 

I never buy gifts for my family.  I just give gift cards and let them pick what they need or want.  

Honored Contributor
Posts: 15,852
Registered: ‎09-01-2010

Re: Would you loan money to a friend or family member?

It would totally depend on which friend, and which family member.  Yes to the few who would even ask, as I would know it was a dire situation, and I would do what I could to help.  

Honored Contributor
Posts: 41,612
Registered: ‎03-09-2010

Re: Would you loan money to a friend or family member?


@sidsmom wrote:

Question:

What if they asked for $1000 & the next day they were sporting a new handbag & new clothes?    Do you feel you have a say how they spend your lent money?


 

 

how would i know how, where, and when or if they purchased them.....if they purchased them at all? i would not presume that they used the money for THAT. i loan the money and i dont second guess what they told me they needed it for.

********************************************
"The world is a dangerous place, not because of those who do evil, but because of those who look on and do nothing." - Albert Einstein
Honored Contributor
Posts: 26,549
Registered: ‎12-17-2012

Re: Would you loan money to a friend or family member?

No.

Fate whispers to her, "You cannot withstand the storm." She whispers back, "I am the storm."

Honored Contributor
Posts: 17,892
Registered: ‎07-03-2013

Re: Would you loan money to a friend or family member?

I've loaned money to a co-worker when they didn't have lunch money.  That's the extent of what I'd loan.

Honored Contributor
Posts: 10,930
Registered: ‎03-10-2010

Re: Would you loan money to a friend or family member?

I have to the kids, small amounts.  When I have parted with large amounts, it was a gift, not a loan.  Loaning money to friends and family can eat you alive.

 

I know a friend who did loan a friend of hers 10,000.  She went to the bank, and made it like a loan.  She had a payment book and everything drawn up.  It was interest free to her friend.  It worked out really well that way.  Foe her anyway.

Respected Contributor
Posts: 2,205
Registered: ‎10-07-2013

Re: Would you loan money to a friend or family member?

Absolutely, unequivocally NO!!!