Re: Would you loan money to a friend or family mem... - Page 2

Peaches McPhee · ‎04-19-2010

Probably yes. But I'd treat it as a gift, not a loan, so I am not upset when (if) it does not get paid back. If I can't afford to give it away, I would not lend it.

-- pro-aging --

Rochester, New York

sidsmom · ‎11-25-2011

Question:

What if they asked for $1000 & the next day they were sporting a new handbag & new clothes? Do you feel you have a say how they spend your lent money?

AnikaBrodie · ‎03-10-2010

Loan money to a family member? Never again. That is unless I don't care about getting it back some day.

Many years ago I loaned (she knew it was a loan) my older sister a substantial amount of money so she could move from another state back home. It also included money for attorney fees as she was divorcing her then husband and they had a young pre-school age daughter. She did not want the father to have visitation rights but had no valid legal reason for the request.

After several years of no payments, not even a small amount, I wrote it off thinking I would never get any money back, not even a partial payment. So, imagine my surprise when she mailed me partial payment for the loan over 25 years after the initial loan. Then, afterwards, she complained to another sister because I did not send her a thank you letter for the return of my money. I never could figure her logic on that ... my money, my loan.

Needless to say, I no longer have a good relationship with the sister in question. That is her fault, not mine. I will never loan her money again for any reason. She taught me that lesson well.

"Faith, Hope, Love; the greatest of these is Love." ~The Silver Fox~

bonnielu · ‎03-11-2010

I did once and to my surprise they paid it back in full. I didn't expect that to happen. I have not been approached again by anyone. My feeling is I would look at the situation, decide if I could afford it and then give not expecting any money back. We are now retired and I think I would have to be comfortable with the amount.

I never buy gifts for my family. I just give gift cards and let them pick what they need or want.

RedTop · ‎09-01-2010

It would totally depend on which friend, and which family member. Yes to the few who would even ask, as I would know it was a dire situation, and I would do what I could to help.

sunshine45 · ‎03-09-2010

@sidsmom wrote:
Question:
What if they asked for $1000 & the next day they were sporting a new handbag & new clothes? Do you feel you have a say how they spend your lent money?

how would i know how, where, and when or if they purchased them.....if they purchased them at all? i would not presume that they used the money for THAT. i loan the money and i dont second guess what they told me they needed it for.

********************************************
"The world is a dangerous place, not because of those who do evil, but because of those who look on and do nothing." - Albert Einstein

Preds · ‎12-17-2012

No.

Fate whispers to her, "You cannot withstand the storm." She whispers back, "I am the storm."

GCR18 · ‎07-03-2013

I've loaned money to a co-worker when they didn't have lunch money. That's the extent of what I'd loan.

shoekitty · ‎03-10-2010

I have to the kids, small amounts. When I have parted with large amounts, it was a gift, not a loan. Loaning money to friends and family can eat you alive.

I know a friend who did loan a friend of hers 10,000. She went to the bank, and made it like a loan. She had a payment book and everything drawn up. It was interest free to her friend. It worked out really well that way. Foe her anyway.