Reply
Trusted Contributor
Posts: 1,983
Registered: ‎11-21-2011

Re: Would Infidelity In Your Relationship, Be Forgiveable?

I don't think anyone can just give an answer to this question if they haven't been through it. It's too black and white of a question. People can say that they would definitely do something but that could change depending on the circumstances.

 

If your spouse is bad person and a regular cheater that's one thing.

 

If your spouse has always been a decent person and suddenly cheats that's another. You probably have to think about why that might have happened. Cheating is never the right answer to marriage problems but if you've been ignoring your spouse, too busy with work and kids and all manner of things that come up, that could change the equation.

 

 

Honored Contributor
Posts: 8,179
Registered: ‎03-10-2010

Re: Would Infidelity In Your Relationship, Be Forgiveable?


@SahmIam wrote:

Depends on why the person cheated. 

 

I agree 100% with Sidsmom


 

There is no reason to justify cheating.

Honored Contributor
Posts: 18,415
Registered: ‎11-25-2011

Re: Would Infidelity In Your Relationship, Be Forgiveable?

[ Edited ]

Can’t help but think if Prince Charles & Princess Diana 

would’ve handled their situation differently (ie not divorce)...

 

just giving each other a ‘knowing nod’ that they each have

extramarital affairs and continue to be united in their

Royal Marriage...

 

she might be still alive today.

(I.e....she would have had royal security, etc)

 

Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 7,434
Registered: ‎01-27-2014

Re: Would Infidelity In Your Relationship, Be Forgiveable?

It’s the disrespect (demonstrated by having an affair) that poisons and kills a relationship. One can end it quickly or let it die slowly over time. Either way, once trust is broken and there’s that level of disrespect, it’s over. Clear and simple. Women or men should not tolerate being treated so disrespectfully. I personally think marriage is an outdated concept. We should end such contracts.

Respected Contributor
Posts: 4,157
Registered: ‎03-04-2015

Re: Would Infidelity In Your Relationship, Be Forgiveable?

No, if there is no trust there i no love,and if there is no love there is no hope

Honored Contributor
Posts: 35,887
Registered: ‎05-22-2016

Re: Would Infidelity In Your Relationship, Be Forgiveable?

[ Edited ]

I tried to forgive my last husband. But when a woman showed up at my front door, holding a baby, claiming the kid was his...well then it didn't take long to make up my mind. 

Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 5,062
Registered: ‎09-12-2010

Re: Would Infidelity In Your Relationship, Be Forgiveable?

@suziebee1, my situation was very similar to yours. After 22 years of marriage - and I thought he was my soul-mate. He was like your ex - he never once admitted that he had been having an affair with an office worker and that it had been going on for at least 6-months. I honestly had no clue what was going on. He also moved out "to find himself" and lied about an apartment he had supposedly found, but had actually moved in with her. He lied about everything. Anyone who puts their spouse through that grief does not deserve a second chance. The marriage is over and nothing can bring it back.

Respected Contributor
Posts: 4,109
Registered: ‎03-11-2010

Re: Would Infidelity In Your Relationship, Be Forgiveable?

Absolutely.  Been married 46 years and once trust is broken it can't be fixed.

QVC Customer Care
Posts: 2,926
Registered: ‎06-14-2015

Re: Would Infidelity In Your Relationship, Be Forgiveable?

This post has been removed by QVC because it is personally directed at another poster

Honored Contributor
Posts: 9,139
Registered: ‎04-16-2010

Re: Would Infidelity In Your Relationship, Be Forgiveable?

[ Edited ]

@missy1 wrote:

@SahmIam wrote:

Depends on why the person cheated. 

 

I agree 100% with Sidsmom


 

There is no reason to justify cheating.


 @missy1 And that is your opinion, which you are entitled to. Not everyone agrees.  

 

There are many couples who have a "friend" on the side and their spouse is aware of it. Is that still considered cheating? To some, it isn't. To others, it is. This is one of those questions that cause people to believe what works for them must work for everyone else; it doesn't. Hence, my answer and why I agree with Sidsmom. 

 

No one has the right answer but neither is anyone's wrong. It's only right for that specific person. IMHO and experience, a question like this usually leads to arguments whether it's among a group of friends or in the classroom.