@chiclet wrote:
I am the original poster and not having a bad day. Husband and I went to lunch and I went to Sephora while he went to book store. To my knowlede I don't have any diseases and love to read and work in the yard when cool enough. I have four little dogs that get me out of bed each morning and make me laugh. I guess what my post was about depends on the type of personality you have. I have always been a goal oriented person and busy and living more in the future than in the present. I like to know there is something ahead I need to accomplish and now there really isnt anything that needs to be accomplished. Yes I can shop and watch tv and go to lunch and read and volunteer to pass off the rest of the time I have left. As for the physical as long as I am healthy, I am not worried about the wrinkles or gray hair. We are all different and a lot of retirees I know seem so glad to not have to work anymore. I am hoping to go to work part time but my husband went through cancer last year (doing well) and my dog is sick right now and cant leave her. Just talking and expressing how I feel. I don't understand why people jump on here and tell everyone else how they should feel. We are all different. Some of us just cannot tell ourselves to feel a certain way. If that was possible we would all be happy and positive and the world would be a wonderful happy fantasyland. I feel very fortunate to be where I am but I also loved thinking there was so many great things ahead to look forward too and I would kidding myself to think at 65 I am going to have a lot of great things ahead.
I can relate to this in some ways. After working for so many years and having kids 10 years apart, all of a sudden I realized that much of what I had done was driven by outside influences. Job, taking care of the kids, home, hubby. And when I was younger I wanted to do all and experience all I could. I loved meeting new people, experiencing new cultures, travel, concerts, sporting events, parties, entertaining, you name it. Work, work, work, go, go, go. I was a bit burnt out and was happy to be lucky enough not to have to work. After the initial euphoria, lol, it became increasingly difficult to get motivated. I was used to multitasking and was extremely organized. I was also a very social person. I also realized that working gave me a sense of self worth and identity. I had worked from age 15. It can be a difficult adjustment. Also I was fairly young and most everyone my age was working. I did some volunteer work, etc., but still felt a little lost. I was used to a very regimented schedule, but not a schedule that had actually ever been dictated by me.
About the time I was thinking of going back to work, I started having some medical issues and was in two car accidents. One thing lead to another, blah, blah, fast forward to where I am now.
I was fortunate to enjoy my work, but working was a means to an end. I had never really ever had the opportunity to explore just what I wanted to do in life, work wise, it all more or less fell into place through career advancements.
You are faced with really examining yourself and getting to know what you want to do, for you. I think it is very common when people stop working and reach a certain age to start looking back on life wondering just what you have accomplished, and beating yourself up thinking it should be more. You are fortunate to be in good health.
I don't want to live the fast paced life I once did even if I was physically able to do it. I also find myself less enthused by certain things because "I've been there, done that". Due to health problems I ask myself if the effort is worth the experience and sometimes talk myself out of doing things because it seems too much of a hassle. When I find myself going there too much, I try to just do it anyway. Sometimes I regret it, but most often it turns out good. But I'm also content to be at home and entertain at home, or just be home by myself or with my hubby.
I know people my age who are flying all over the country, going here and there, constantly out at restaurants, visiting other people, going on cruises, etc. I know that's not possible for me due to health reasons, but frankly, I wouldn't want to do that now anyway. I like my creature comforts of home. I don't want to be stuck in some airport with my flight delayed or to be gone that much. It's a little weird because before I was always up to doing anything.
My kids all live here and we are close and spend time together. I'm looking forward to grandkids. I wish I could do more than I can but my superwoman days are over, lol.
You can have many great things ahead, you just have to decide what they are. If things work out, maybe you can go back to work part time. Nothing wrong with that. Set some goals for yourself. They might not be as lofty as they once were (or they might!) but it will give you a sense of accomplishment.
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