Community Chat

[151949]

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@Citrine1 wrote:

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@CelticCrafter wrote:

I would have made sure we bought what we thought would have been our dream home.

This was not, it was only supposed to be a starter home and here we are 38 years later...

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I can relate to this @CelticCrafter.  We are still in our same home after 34 years and I'm at an age now where I realize I will probably never move.  I loved our house when we first got it and, to some degree, still do, but the neighborhood is going downhill and things just aren't the same.  

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We were in our same home for 28 years. We wanted to move to Florida when we retired and we love it here , but we still miss our old house and our old neighborhood and neighbors. If only Pittsburgh had Florida weather and the beach......

[qualitygal]

I'd want to know more about cooking, and shopping, and business.

[151949]

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@pattypeep wrote:

@Citrine1 @CelticCrafter You are both probably financially stable because of staying in your homes all these years. My dh and I marvel constantly about how many young folks have to have the best of the best, move around, upgrade, etc, etc. Not satisfied with just a nice home~it has to be top of the line in every respect. Then they either lose their homes (divorce?) or are so deeply in debt that they cannot get out.

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IMO a lot of this is due to HGTV. They see other couples on TV getting things and they want them too. They really don't understand the cost of those high end finishes they want. When we were selling our house in Pa I remember one couple wanted the realtor to tell us they would buy if we just finished the basement, put in granite, Stainless appliances and hard wood floors. He told them they would not be able to even get close to buying our house if it had all that as they were barely able to afford it without all that stuff. They thought they could get it for the same price with all that in it.These kids are clueless and no one educates them.

[Suziepeach]

If you've got anything in your history that might come up later in your marriage & be questioned, get it all out in the open to begin with.. Like credit & etc.. 

And oh yeah, it's yes dear and the wife is always right!!

[cherry]

I've been  happily married for 52 years, to the same person.  I don't have any idea what to tell someone else ,about how to live  happily.

We are all different ,and what works for us ,might not work for others

[SeattleShopper1]

A Budget!  in writing  and All Credit Accounts  and Loans disclosed!  A joint savings account where both people contribute.  Also,  both  should also have an agreed-upon amount of money each month set aside for their own personal spending (or saving)  -- No explanation needed.  And enjoy life together 

[cotton4me]

Don’t try to change the other person, accept them for who they are. 

[Suziepeach]

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@SeattleShopper1 wrote:

A Budget!  in writing  and All Credit Accounts  and Loans disclosed!  A joint savings account where both people contribute.  Also,  both  should also have an agreed-upon amount of money each month set aside for their own personal spending (or saving)  -- No explanation needed.  And enjoy life together 

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@SeattleShopper1, I you over and over!!!!!!!

[151949]

@SeattleShopper1  I think each couple needs to work out for themselves how they want to handle the finances. Every marriage is unique. My first marriage he brought home his pay and gave it all to me. Every day I gave him his spending money for the day in his lunchbox. That was how my parents did things so it was how we did things.

My second marriage - we were both older, had our own cc and debts etc already so we each contributed to the household expenses and the "house" has it's own bank acct. where those bills are paid -- then we each kept our own accounts we had before we married and took care of our own expenses. Over the years those have melted into more & more house fund debts and less & less individual ones but the separate accts still exist & everyone involved is happy.

[Mom2Dogs]

Dh and I both had been living on our own before marriage...he was older with 2 children.  Once we were married we opened a business and learned from the get go to not spend money you don't have...everything went to the business and we also saved what we could.  We rearely vacation, it is not something we enjoy and could never close the business for more than a few days at a time...(we don't feel slighted).

We are still in the same home, ugh...it is nice but I so want to move...it will never happen unless  I am left on my own, I would not want this house, just a little to big for one person.

Just this  year are we experiencing difficulties with money...health care costs and medication is eating all of our disposable income.  We have a nice savings which was for when we retired, we will have to dip into it to pay for health care...glad we have it and saved when we could.