Why do posts go off the subject or turn mean? - Page 6

Diva on The Q · ‎03-28-2016

@CalminHeart wrote:
I've read a lot of posts on these forums that don't make sense and/or could be taken a number of ways. Ignore them. Why let an anonymous person's comment take up space in your brain.

"...Why let an anonymous person's comments take up space in your brain." Words to live by.

RetRN · ‎10-01-2013

The mods are here to help with this. Some major offenders I no longer see here.

puttypiesmom · ‎10-11-2017

It's like off the forums and into our own private lives, I'm sure we don't discuss certain topics with total strangers for if we did there is no telling what type of reaction one would get. I'm thinking of that news story where a young woman said, "you're for who???" and then proceeded to pummel that person until they bled on the sidewalk. Here on the forums you would have certain members thinking that was just fine while others would just keep mum while the sane people would say that is never acceptable. I'm in the group that says it is never acceptable.

Nancy Drew · ‎03-11-2010

It really is just a few who show up every time to LOL at your opinion and really just a few who think it is their job to scold you and tell you what to think.

Wrong is still wrong just because you benefited from it.

RedTop · ‎09-01-2010

I see it as general nature of different human beings.

However it does not help when it takes an OP multiple posts to provide pertinent details to their pretty vague original question, or statement.

It also does not help when posters don’t read the entire post for clarity before jumping in with their assumptions of the situation. Not reading one or two key words can make a big difference in a response. Once their assumption is posted, other posters pile on that assumption, and there it goes.

I think of myself as an observant person. I knew my mothers off the wall response to something I said in 2010 was the start of her mental changes, even tho she didn’t get a diagnosis of early stage dementia until last year. I’ve been participating here long enough to have seen big changes in mental attitudes and written responses that make me question what might really be going on with certain posters.

BirkiLady · ‎02-22-2015

@Free2be wrote:
Convos can go off the rails for something as simple as a poster who wants to talk about themselves instead of the topic. Sometimes it's really annoying. LOL

But an outright insult such as "Educate yourself!" which I've seen a few times, a rude assumption to make of a person's knowledge base, or "Spare me your opinion" which is another way of saying shut up -- these things are so unneccessary. People don't think before they post because they get caught up in their own ego need.

We know this. It's like watching someone struggle for air. Sometimes it's smart to let them get their breath, sad as it is, rather than choke them off.

@Free2be WOW! This post hit directly at me. I know I've written "Look it up and educate yourself." In all honesty, it didn't occur to me that was an insult or an "ego need." If other posters feel I'm guilty, I offer my humble apologies . . . with an explanation. Comments like that, were simply meant as educational.

I'm an avid reader and always learning more. It's in my DNA to search for additional information and answers. When posters skip past something that has been written previously or they could Google the information, I'm annoyed and/or frustrated by their expectation of having someone else find the answer for them. Thus, I do encourage others to "Look it up and educate yourself."

Currently tied up with canvassing and volunteering for the elections. Have not been on these Forums much within the past six weeks. However, if I do return actively you may see me post that phrase. Please be aware I do not mean it as an insult or as an ego trip.

Money screams; wealth whispers.

BirkiLady · ‎02-22-2015

@hckynut My husband and his brothers talked about "Only the Shadows knows" from his childhood in CB, IA (in deep, spooky voices) and listening to the radio.

He was two years older than me, but loved that character! He would often entertain my mom, sister and I late at night with his memories of "The Shadow." (Mom might have known about it; I don't remember.) My sister and I just have images (from our own imaginations) of "The Shadow" from their ghostly voices and scarey movements. We'd all end up laughing until the tears would flow at an adult man playing "The Shadow."

You make me laugh every time you post. Wonderful memories of a dear man.

Money screams; wealth whispers.

Marp · ‎03-09-2010

@BirkiLady wrote:
@Free2be wrote:
Convos can go off the rails for something as simple as a poster who wants to talk about themselves instead of the topic. Sometimes it's really annoying. LOL

But an outright insult such as "Educate yourself!" which I've seen a few times, a rude assumption to make of a person's knowledge base, or "Spare me your opinion" which is another way of saying shut up -- these things are so unneccessary. People don't think before they post because they get caught up in their own ego need.

We know this. It's like watching someone struggle for air. Sometimes it's smart to let them get their breath, sad as it is, rather than choke them off.

@Free2be WOW! This post hit directly at me. I know I've written "Look it up and educate yourself." In all honesty, it didn't occur to me that was an insult or an "ego need." If other posters feel I'm guilty, I offer my humble apologies . . . with an explanation. Comments like that, were simply meant as educational.

I'm an avid reader and always learning more. It's in my DNA to search for additional information and answers. When posters skip past something that has been written previously or they could Google the information, I'm annoyed and/or frustrated by their expectation of having someone else find the answer for them. Thus, I do encourage others to "Look it up and educate yourself."

Currently tied up with canvassing and volunteering for the elections. Have not been on these Forums much within the past six weeks. However, if I do return actively you may see me post that phrase. Please be aware I do not mean it as an insult or as an ego trip.

@BirkiLady, as is often the case it is not what is said but how it is said. In its best light "Look it up and educate yourself." comes across as harsh and dismissive. Offering a tidbit of information and suggesting further research, perhaps even with key word phrasing, would come across as helpful.

As for posters being able to Google information please keep in mind that finding what one specifically wants is often a matter of finessing the inquiry; getting meaningful returns is often very much an art.

What is good for the goose today will also be good for the gander tomorrow.

BirkiLady · ‎02-22-2015

@Marp Great suggestions. Duly noted. Thank you.

Money screams; wealth whispers.

Spurt · ‎03-20-2010

What irritates me is there might be an interesting thread and interesting discussion going on, and even though folks might not totally agree everything is still cordial....Then along comes someone with a beef against another poster and a snarky comment is made (not even relevant to the discussion, its just because there's bad blood between the two) and what ends up happening is these two battle back and forth with hateful remarks aimed at each other, and the entire thread is closed for commenting or deleted, and a nice conversation is shut down because of a couple of people