Community Chat

[ladyroxanne]

@Tinkrbl44

maybe i should make myself clear.

after i made my feelings known to this man and if management didn't back me up[ and he still continued to bother me, then i would have my husband intercede.

isn't that what husband's are for???   LOL

[cookinfreak]

I worked at a place where a sleazebag kept bugging me.  Told him to quit bugging me. He was just a low life.  He was married with a couple of kids.  He wasn't just hitting on me either.  Once he called me at home.  I hung up on him.  The next day at work, I was in our break room and he walked in. I let him have it with both barrels.  He had his back against the vending machine.  Told him if I was ever going to stoop so low as to have an affair with a married man, he would certainly be a lot more rich and way better looking than he was.  Then I told him I would call his wife and he said "Go ahead.  I don't care" So then I said "Fine, then I'm going into the manager's office with it".  I didn't go to the manager that day, but a day or so later she called me in and asked me about it and I said he hadn't bothered me since but she told me they had been looking to get rid of him and it would have sped up the process.

I hope this scum gets what is coming to him soon

Good Luck

cookin

[sunshine45]

if management or the boss isnt getting involved then isnt this a harrassment case that the person or persons can go see a lawyer about?  if each thing they do to try to prevent this from continuing isnt working, then legal steps should be taken.

http://money.usnews.com/money/careers/articles/2015/02/12/6-things-to-know-about-workplace-sexual-ha...

[ECBG]

I would SO plan to get coffee when he did and have my phone on record and get that crumb!

[MacDUFF]

@cookinfreak

You go, girl!!  That's the way I've handled it a few times...in their faces with both barrels!

[Kachina624]

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@ladyroxanne wrote:

if it were me and my management wouldn't do anything about it i would have my husband have a little talk with him.  i don't mean a physical thing, but i agree, he is a coward, too.  dh being involved would really scare the bejessus out of him.

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@ladyroxanne  Wrong.  If you report it to your employer and he takes no action, you pick up the phone and call the Equal Employment Opportunity Commission at the US Department of Labor and file a complaint.  

Women should not depend on or involve their husbands in solving workplace problems.  It can lead to volatile confrontations and make the situation worse.

[Tinkrbl44]

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@Kachina624 wrote:

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@ladyroxanne wrote:

if it were me and my management wouldn't do anything about it i would have my husband have a little talk with him.  i don't mean a physical thing, but i agree, he is a coward, too.  dh being involved would really scare the bejessus out of him.

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@ladyroxanne  Wrong.  If you report it to your employer and he takes no action, you pick up the phone and call the Equal Employment Opportunity Commission at the US Department of Labor and file a complaint.  

Women should not depend on or involve their husbands in solving workplace problems.  It can lead to volatile confrontations and make the situation worse.

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You are 100% correct ......   and if being very direct with the slimy offender doesn't stop it, this needs to be on the record.    These things get swept under the rug or side-stepped all too often .... and it has to stop.

Not long ago there were posts about the Cosby victims harshly criticized because they didn't report attacks to the police.    This really isn't any different ..... people don't seem to grasp that it's illegal behavior.

[Ms X]

I have never had a problem getting rid of men and I don't look like Quasimodo.  Just ignore them and they will leave you alone.  It's always worked for me.  I was visiting a friend once and happened to be in the kitchen at the same time as her sleazy boyfriend.  On my way to the fridge, he literally grabbed me.  I just kept walking without missing a beat, got my stuff out of the fridge and went back to the table as if nothing had happened.  We all had a lovely evening, and he never bothered me again. I knew it was nothing serious, so I didn't bother to mention it to her.  It was a summer fling, as I assumed it woudl be.

I could go on and on along those lines.  Would this approach help you?

[Puzzle Piece]

@Ms X It is not me.  I will let the gal know everyone's takes. 

I HAVE TO ASK.  WHAT KIND OF MOMS OR DAD'S RAISED GUYS LIKE THIS? 

[Ms X]

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@Puzzle Piece wrote:

@Ms X It is not me.  I will let the gal know everyone's takes. 

I HAVE TO ASK.  WHAT KIND OF MOMS OR DAD'S RAISED GUYS LIKE THIS? 

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I don't know your friend, Loves Roses, but I've always believed that some women just love the attention even if they pretend not to.  In my experience, men do not just do these things over and over without encouragement.  Well, maybe a small minority do, but most will leave you alone if you just ignore them.

Years ago, I remember this young woman at a college party going on and on at the top of her voice about some guy who had gone to her house and tried to (or succeeded, I don't recall) climb into her bedroom window in the middle of the night.  She made a big deal about this and how shocked she was and how she didn't want him to do this, yada, yada, yada.  I remember thinking that no way did this happen without her egging him on.  She was not really all that irresistible.  Many women love to pretend that they are relentlessly pursued against their will when they are really feeding the situation. 

As I've said, I've never had a problem discouraging unwanted attention from others' boyfriends, husbands, etc., etc.  If you just utterly ignore it, the situation usually goes away.  I don't think I've ever even told anyone about these situations before my post here because they've never become a nuisance.  There are exceptions, of course.