When you live alone

gidgetgh · ‎03-09-2010

I don't mean this to be a sad thread at all. It's just reality. And eye opening.

I realize I'm still in a state of shock because my husband passed away, but I've started tackling a little bit of the purging of things.....non personal things. And it really is an eye opener. I'm not ready to tackle most of my husbands personal things yet. And my stepsons will be coming over to go through all that to take what they want in mid August. After they take what they want, my sister and best friend are going to help me with the rest.

So I live alone now. When looking at the things we own, even though I'm not into clutter at all, and never have been, and our house is really very "lean" compared to others, it just astounds me the amount of stuff we have that I don't need now. That WE really didn't need before.

Like plastic storage containers. I'm a Tupperware brand girl and one brand from The Container Store. You know how much of it I've used in the past few months? None. Zero. So even though I go through the plastic stuff on a regular basis and purge, I went through it all again last night and several pieces are going to Goodwill today and I still have too much, but I like the pieces so the rest will stay....for now. But seriously....

We have 2 roasting pans. I have my favorite and always use it and the other just was sitting there so out it goes. Same with the cookie sheets. I have 2 that I use. No need to keep others. I'm never going to use them.

Even before my husband passed away, way before, I had significantly reduced the amount of towels and sheet sets we have. Just don't need that many. Didn't want that many.

I have significantly reduced the number of throws we have. We had too many for 2 of us. I donated several. Still had too many. I donated 4 more a few weeks ago. I think I'm ok for now, but seriously, how many throws does a 1 or 2 person family need?

I have substantially reduced the number of purses I had. Just don't want that many anymore.

I think the whole stay at home with Covid had something to do with this. I mean, we were home for months and it really made me look at the excess in our lives. And now that my husband is gone, I just don't want so much stuff.

Anyway, random musings this morning.

Why is it, when I have a 50/50 guess at something, I'm always 100% wrong?

suziebee1 · ‎12-28-2015

@gidgetghI am doing the same. I think as a society, we are going more toward the minimalistic lifestyle than before. Going thru Covid and such, we all realize that we really don't care WHAT we have as possessions. I think it is a good thing to do - get rid of things you don't need and let someone who can use them have them. I Freecycle and Goodwill a lot of things, and Facebook has some pages in my area for giving things away to people who need them. It is a great feeling - both of helping someone who needs something and also lightening the load.

Sounds like you are doing as well as can be expected after the loss of your husband. I wish you much peace.

I am still oxox · ‎03-09-2010

@gidgetgh

Sending hugs and prayer over the loss of your husband, I have read some your posts in the past, may his memory be a blessing as you go about your days

@gidgetgh wrote:
I don't mean this to be a sad thread at all. It's just reality. And eye opening.

I realize I'm still in a state of shock because my husband passed away, but I've started tackling a little bit of the purging of things.....non personal things. And it really is an eye opener. I'm not ready to tackle most of my husbands personal things yet. And my stepsons will be coming over to go through all that to take what they want in mid August. After they take what they want, my sister and best friend are going to help me with the rest.

So I live alone now. When looking at the things we own, even though I'm not into clutter at all, and never have been, and our house is really very "lean" compared to others, it just astounds me the amount of stuff we have that I don't need now. That WE really didn't need before.

Like plastic storage containers. I'm a Tupperware brand girl and one brand from The Container Store. You know how much of it I've used in the past few months? None. Zero. So even though I go through the plastic stuff on a regular basis and purge, I went through it all again last night and several pieces are going to Goodwill today and I still have too much, but I like the pieces so the rest will stay....for now. But seriously....

We have 2 roasting pans. I have my favorite and always use it and the other just was sitting there so out it goes. Same with the cookie sheets. I have 2 that I use. No need to keep others. I'm never going to use them.

Even before my husband passed away, way before, I had significantly reduced the amount of towels and sheet sets we have. Just don't need that many. Didn't want that many.

I have significantly reduced the number of throws we have. We had too many for 2 of us. I donated several. Still had too many. I donated 4 more a few weeks ago. I think I'm ok for now, but seriously, how many throws does a 1 or 2 person family need?

I have substantially reduced the number of purses I had. Just don't want that many anymore.

I think the whole stay at home with Covid had something to do with this. I mean, we were home for months and it really made me look at the excess in our lives. And now that my husband is gone, I just don't want so much stuff.

Anyway, random musings this morning.

Stop being afraid of what could go wrong and start being positive what could go right.

Anonymous032819 · ‎03-29-2019

@gidgetgh

I hear you, and I'm sorry for your loss.

I am slowly cleaning out my dad's bedroom, and if it weren't for the stupid virus, I would be a lot further along than I am.

Thrift stores aren't open, so I can't donate.

it's probably going to be sometime next year before I can get all of his stuff out and gone.

I hate this stupid virus for many reasons, and that is just one of them.

The Sky looks different when you have someone you love up there.

Mombo1 · ‎11-02-2015

@gidgetgh May I first say that I am sorry for your loss. I also live alone and am at that point in life where I have to decide between "want vs. need". I have 3 very young granddaughters and I have more fun getting things for them. Plus they always seem to find something at my house that they think they need to take home. Fine with me. 🤗 So I agree with you...I just don't need that much stuff anymore.....

Bri369 · ‎11-03-2018

We sold our big home and moved to a more manageable house last year. I had to significantly reduce. As I was going through so many things - honestly, a lot of it was my mom's that my sister couldn't deal with right away - I was struck with how much I overbuy whether it's on sale or I'll think I'll use it in the future or it's an impulse buy.

Just getting rid of all that lightened my load significantly. I do not like excess or clutter. I don't like hanging on to things just because. I really have to love it or need it. It's a constant state of purging.

Nothing gives me more anxiety than looking at drawers and closets stuffed to the brim with things. When I open a drawer, I want to see order. When I open the closet, I want to be able to get to it right away and not dig through things.

If I haven't used something in over a year, out it goes. If I find something and forgot that I even had it, out it goes.

My home is homey and not stark or bare. I have things that I love and use all over. Because of Covid, my kids have been home all these months and they have their own stuff. It has to be stored in a way that is pleasing to me.

Yes, the Container Store is my very close friend. LOL

Jordan2 · ‎03-16-2010

@gidgetgh I'm so sorry for the loss of your husband. I'm not sure how long ago he passed, just don't do anything too drastic. Make sure you keep some mementos, things that will remind you of your husband. It is very nice of you to have your stepsons come over to look through their father's things ( sometimes relationships between step kids and step parents aren't good). I think donating clothes to a charity that can pass on the clothing to those in need is great. You should take some time with this, I know from experience how difficult it is to go through a loved one's possessions. Again, condolences to you.

Still Raining · ‎03-30-2014

Sending warm thoughts to you. A huge change in life.

I have done three big purges and afterwards they felt good. During, not so much. It is all about pleasing you now, so keep things you love.

The other difference is now no one can tell you what to do. It is all on you. Can get good and bad.

Be gentle.

AngelPuppy1 · ‎03-13-2010

@gidgetgh

My condolences to you -- the hardest thing in the world to experience!

I know what you mean about purging things. I haven't been retired too awfully long but now that I have had time to be home a good while, coupled with the virus - more spare time -- I am at the point where I don't need so much of the stuff that I needed when I worked. And, so much stuff I thought I HAD to have, just does not matter to me any more. It's freeing in a way to come to this conclusion and start weeding out things and either donating them or tossing them. Less clutter in the home equals less clutter in the brain! Blessings!

"A day without sunshine is like, you know, night." - Steve Martin