Community Chat

[Cakers3]

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@dooBdoo wrote:

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@Cakers3 wrote:

 I will say one more thing-the recent banning of a certain old-timer had me taking a break from here for a bit.

While I locked horns many times with her, I never forgot a kindness she posted about my DS.  Later we put down our swords and were posting together just fine.

You see- I don't foget a kindness.  And I have to remind myself that we are all in the same boat in life, just with a different crew.  So I keep in mind that my posts were not always the kindest; and yet kindness was still shown to me.

We can scratch, we can claw, we can bite and back-stab; we can hurt people.

We can also own our stuff; we can extend the olive branch, we can move on either with a new friendship, a renewed friendship, or an agreement to just not engage anymore.

It's about choice.  It doesn't matter who makes the first move; as long as the move is made.  This isn't just about this board; it's about life.

I see remarks made about me; and I think how sad it must be to not be able to let go of some long ago forgotten (and probably skewered memory) tiff that really wasn't all that important to begin with.

So sometimes I leave for a bit and stay offline with the ones who have held me up in my darkest times during RL issues; these are the ladies I love as cherished friends.

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            Dearest friend, your post touched my heart and set my mind abuzz (in a good way!) and I wanted to quote it to thank you.    I'm glad you're here, and I hope you stay with us, @Cakers3.❤️

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@dooBdoo  {{{hugs}}}  When I see your posts I know that I will find comfort no matter to whom you are responding.

It's like hearing "Bridge over Troubled Water" which is one of my all-time favorites.

Blessings to you.

[Cakers3]

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@dooBdoo wrote:

           The metamorphosis of this thread has been valuable and contemplative food for thought.  Among all the awesome contributions, however, I hope it's okay to single out @Cakers3 and @puttypiesmom's comments that I quoted because they really hit home in a couple of ways.   

            They, and other posters here, started me thinking about forgiveness, resentments, grudges, and about grace and benevolence.   About how we genuinely can come to care deeply and profoundly about the human beings who post here with us.    And about the lasting effect we have on one another.

            Like @puttypiesmom, I weep for my fellow posters and try to be cognizant of their courageous struggles.    And as she said, "permanently removing someone is like losing someone, I mean really losing someone."   I often disagreed with those who are missing, but their voices are important and they caused me to think about things in a way that's different from my usual perspective.   I find myself feeling a palpable emptiness, a void, and certainly can't rejoice seeing established voices silenced forever.    Like @Cakers3, I remember kindnesses more than the occasional hurts and I yearn for olive branches and new beginnings.   I want us to hear one another -- really hear, and give more weight and power to the kindnesses than to the intermittent slights.   And I hope and pray for understanding and the grace of forgiveness.

            So... I have a request, although no one here owes me anything.    I have a request that we set aside past grievances...  as the hymn says, "lay down our sword and shield..."    That we find forgiveness in our heart and allow each other to start fresh, with the benefit of the doubt that each of us is doing the best we can, we learn as we go, and when we know better we will do better (to paraphrase Maya Angelou).    

            To those who have felt pain, sadness, anger, or offense because of my words and deeds, I am so very sorry.    I hope we can make amends.  I wish we had a way to quietly and privately talk when there's a problem, but the constraints of this forum don't permit it.   Perhaps we can try to do so with all eyes watching, though that's more difficult.  

            So...   I have a request that we see each other as friends with tender hearts and probably painful scars.    We post with individuals who have known -- and who know -- darkness and a depth of anguish that perhaps they never can share.   I have a request that we will be empathetic, sensitive, and that will will extend forgiveness and amity.   Even if the forgiveness or fresh start isn't extended to me, my request is that we try to offer it to as many posters as we can.    

            Let us come away from here as friends.   I, for one, am a better person for knowing all of you and for that I'm eternally grateful.❤️

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@dooBdoo  People forget that we are not just some automated being typing behind the screen.  Real people post.  Warts and all.

[occasionalrain]

@Cakers3 When someone makes clear they dislike me, posts snide comments and insults concerning me or what I have posted they are, in effect, saying that they are nothing like me. I don't want to be like them. I don't want to be seen as their friend or sharing their views. I don't want to be liked by a zealot or a racist so it's pleasing, a compliment when I'm not.

[Cakers3]

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@occasionalrain wrote:

@Cakers3 When someone makes clear they dislike me, posts snide comments and insults concerning me or what I have posted they are, in effect, saying that they are nothing like me. I don't want to be like them. I don't want to be seen as their friend or sharing their views. I don't want to be liked by a zealot or a racist so it's pleasing, a compliment when I'm not.

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@occasionalrain  Thanks-I get your pov now.

[Lipstickdiva]

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@GenXmuse wrote:

I was wondering what happened to Noel. I miss her. 

I know of a few posters that should be banned for overreporting if you get banned over that. 

Who else has been banned?

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@GenXmuse, no kidding. There is one who admitted not long ago to still calling corporate about posts she doesn't like.  But man she will rip other posters apart like it's her job.

[Lipstickdiva]

I remember Ennui.

Is she the poster who had the signature line "Sonny Bono, get off my lanai" from Golden Girls?  LOL

[dooBdoo]

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@KitTkat wrote:

@dooBdoo you sound like someone I'd really like to know and call "friend". I have read several of your recent posts, hearted some, and you have read and hearted some of mine. If you're looking for a hand across the land or sea, mountains or valleys, plains or forests, I'll reach mine out. 👋

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            What a beautiful message, @KitTkat!     I'll reach my hand out to you, too.❤️    Thank you, so much.   (((hugs)))

[dooBdoo]

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@Cakers3 wrote:

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@dooBdoo  {{{hugs}}}  When I see your posts I know that I will find comfort no matter to whom you are responding.

It's like hearing "Bridge over Troubled Water" which is one of my all-time favorites.

Blessings to you.

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            (((@Cakers3))), You touch my heart, my friend.    Thank you, and blessings to you and yours, always in my prayers.❤️