Community Chat

[Cakers3]

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@HappilyEverAfter wrote:

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@Cakers3 wrote:

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@HappilyEverAfter wrote:

We all have our opinions. Whatever works for the couple?

The Tom Jones thread had an interesting debate going about marriage, fidelity, the definition of a good husband, marriages of convenience, open marriages, etc.

Hogan the guy who recently won the lawsuit for being videotaped having s-x with his friend's wife was criticized for the same thing that Tom Jones is being excused for. Double standard?

Hope we can have a civil discussion on this subject.

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Where is that thread??? Usually the mod will close it with a reason why.  It's just gone completely.

I'm surprised the report feature hasn't exploded completely. 

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I think it was going off topic and getting personal with attacks.

I was getting ready to post and the thread disappeared before my eyes.

Some were making excuses for Tom Jones' philandering and explaining that there are all kinds of marriages out there and whatever works for the couple should not be judged. Others were insisting that marriage doesn't include love child/ren and 205 or mistresses a year as was the case with Mr. Jones who was being praised for being a good husband because he and his wife never divorced in spite of his cheating.

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Ugh.  Gotcha.  I'll let that one go.  LOL

*sits on hands*

[hckynut]

One that vows "till death do us part" and lives it till the end.

hckynut(john)

[Trinity11]

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@hckynut wrote:

One that vows "till death do us part" and lives it till the end.

hckynut(john)

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Well said....my sentiments exactly.

[muttmom]

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@MickD wrote:

....separate residences.

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At the very  least separate bathrooms.

We think we have a good marriage and will celebrate 43 years this summer.

[chrystaltree]

There's absolutely no answer to that...lol   It depends on the couple and it also depends on what stage of life you are in.  The marriage you think of as "perfect" when you are 30 might be untolerable when you are 60.  Fidelity might mandatory in a marriage for some but that doesn't mean that it must be that way for every couple.  Different strokes for different folks, as they say. 

[HappilyEverAfter]

If someone is hurting their spouse, physically and/or emotionally or publicly humiliating  them by cheating/lying I could never say they were a good husband/wife in the traditional sense of the word.

There is more to a marriage than a piece of paper which legally keeps you together til death. Financially supporting a spouse does not a good husband make either.  I know couples have open marriages which involve other seckual partners and I have to wonder what is the point of marriage? Sharing expenses? Inheriting each other's investments? Getting a tax break? Staying together for the sake of the kids? Fear of being alone? For some love doesn't include fidelity so why bother with the piece of paper?

[Trinity11]

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@HappilyEverAfter wrote:

If someone is hurting their spouse, physically and/or emotionally or publicly humiliating  them by cheating/lying I could never say they were a good husband/wife in the traditional sense of the word.

There is more to a marriage than a piece of paper which legally keeps you together til death. Financially supporting a spouse does not a good husband make either.  I know couples have open marriages which involve other seckual partners and I have to wonder what is the point of marriage? Sharing expenses? Inheriting each other's investments? Getting a tax break? Staying together for the sake of the kids? Fear of being alone? For some love doesn't include fidelity so why bother with the piece of paper?

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We must be sisters separated at birth! All kidding aside, I completely agree with you.

[Kardi]

Life is short, so to me any marriage that both parties are happy to be in is a good one.  What's good for someone else isn't necessarily good for me.  We all change over time so  marriage must be a flexible agreement.  That being said, we each have some principles we will not compromise on and that is okay too.  

[Lipstickdiva]

It's up to each person to decide what works for them.  I know what works for me and what wouldn't work for me.