Community Chat

[Yardlie]

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@catwhisperer wrote:

To trust my instincts.

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@catwhisperer ... So true, especially as we mature. We just experience so much that we get that gut feeling about things.

[Yardlie]

@sweetee2 ... Yes, we are multi-faceted people. Sometimes the dark side of someone comes out, and it is disappointing. Like you said, time usually heals all.

[catwhisperer]

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@Brinklii wrote:

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@catwhisperer wrote:

To trust my instincts.

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@catwhisperer ... So true, especially as we mature. We just experience so much that we get that gut feeling about things.

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@Yardlie....in my case, I had very good instincts at an early age.  Had I listened to them in my teens/20's/30's, I would have saved myself a whole lot of grief. Live and learn.

[chickenbutt]

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Eyecandy wrote:

Patience has been one for me as I tend to get bored with whatever does not move fast enough for me. My pets help me in this area as they love me so much even when I am not in the best of moods, they come and lay by me or look me in the eye as if to say: This To Will Pass and I am right here loving you all the way through it.

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I'm finding as I have gotten older that I often get bored and impatient, too!   It's like I am fine and all of a sudden, in a nano-second, I feel bored beyond belief.

I've been doing that a lot with tv shows lately.  I will watch for a while and all of a sudden, whether it's one episode in or several, I just cannot watch for another second and I delete it - never looking back.

Also, if other things are going so slow it's nauseating, I get so bored that my mind just shuts down.  

For me, it's just been a thing since I've gotten older that it kicks in so dramatically.

[Yardlie]

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@Moonchilde wrote:

That not everyone will like you, or approve of you, and that's okay - I don't need everyone's approval.

Liking myself just the way I am and being comfortable in my own skin.

That everyone's definition of frienship isn't the same.

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@Moonchilde ... That's a big one that it seems everyone struggles with...liking yourself just the way you are and being comfortable in your own skin. I don't know when I finally came to accept myself the way I am, but it happened eventually.

Not needing everyone's approval is another one that a lot of people struggle with. I think there are advantages to growing older...we come to accept ourselves and become comfortable in our own skin.

[Yardlie]

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@IamMrsG wrote:

I am a cancer survivor, and I have said many times having had it improved my life.  Cancer puts life in proper perspective in rapid fashion.  It took cancer to teach me, "Don't sweat the small stuff...It's all small stuff."   

@Yardlie  This is a good thread.

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@IamMrsG ... So something good came out of the cancer? Isn't that the truth...that it's all small stuff. Illness teaches you to put things into perspective.

[birkin baby]

It is okay to say no.

[dooBdoo]

        Hardest lesson I learned probably was that not everyone cares how others feel, not everyone cares if they've hurt another human being, and a select few even relish the pain or damage they inflict.   It took me a long time.   Eventually it took working with a couple of people, who were in a high position of power, who treated others like pawns in a game.   But I see it elsewhere, too.   We even see it on the internet, and part of that comes from anonymous nicknames not thinking about or caring about the fact that all these nics have a flesh-and-blood person behind them.

[Yardlie]

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@Moonchilde wrote:

@chickenbutt, I didn't have issues growing up that were anywhere near as severe and horrible as yours, but I did suffer emotional abuse and parental disinterest, and it was made very clear to me in my childhood and teens that I didn't matter squat in the scheme of things to anyone - not my mother, father or step-father. There was *always* some lack, some way I didn't measure up - even the things I enjoyed or was good at would be deprecated as not important, weird, etc.  One thing this has done is to make me a quitter, because if I faltered and needed help doing/learning something it was never there - I've never had backup. So if I would try to learn/do something new and it was too hard to figure out on my own I'd just drop it. I've never had a ton of friends (introvert) and helpful strangers around 😏

It took a long time for me to accept that I was okay being me, and that I was smart, funny and a worthwhile person, and if anyone didn't approve, tough thit, their loss not mine.

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@Moonchilde ...Sounds like your childhood was similar to mine. I lacked the nurturing, loving mother who encouraged her child. I was always told that I would fail or that I wasn't good/pretty enough, so don't bother doing whatever. That was my mother's way of keeping me at home so she wouldn't have to worry about me.

Thankfully, I met and married a very sweet man who loves me for who I am. He has taught me to accept myself and to not need anyone's approval.

[Yardlie]

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@willdob3 wrote:

That I am an imperfect human & that the only way I will get through all that is dumped on me in life is to confess my need for God and give it all over to Him. I do this every single day and He carries me through all of it. 

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@willdob3 ...We are all imperfect humans. It's wonderful to know God and to be able to give everything over to Him.