Community Chat

[Cakers3]

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@Annabellethecat66 wrote:

A lie is a lie.

However, I don’t think you should hurt someone’s feelings.

My daughter’s have always trusted my opinion.  For instance, if they are trying on clothes and the garment looks bad, they know I’ll say something like...”Maybe a shirt where the stripes go up and down would look better”. 

I’ve always said there are two ways of saying something.

I try not to lie because I have a bad memory and wouldn’t remember the lie.

I do know someone who is the biggest provocateur I’ve ever known.  She makes up lies just for the sake of lying.

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@Annabellethecat66   Mmmmmm....maybe.  But our children should not be lied to anyway. 

I get your point-trying on clothes and what will look nice on your daughter.

But we are teaching our children the way to be constructive with our criticism (maybe a harsh word but I'm hungry and tired now lol) and also teaching them that not everyone will agree with them-even if it is just how a blouse will look. 

We build on a foundation of trust regarding opinions with them and from there they learn.

Good on you, though.  I get it.

[tansy]

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@DiAnne wrote:

I will quote my parents "If you can't say something nice don't say anything at all". 

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Exactly why I don't post much anymore, @DiAnne.  😏 🤐

[suzyQ3]

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@Sheila P-Burg wrote:

@suzyQ3  .....  Are you saying there is no way to look the person in the eye and answer nicely without telling a lie?

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@Sheila P-BurgI'm not looking at this question as applied to one type of interaction but more a general overview. Context of course comes into play.

[Burnsite]

Lying for one's own profit and advancement:  that is a serious lie.

Gentling down something not to hurt feelings?  Not the same thing.

People who tell lies in order to profit from them are frauds.

[willdob3]

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@Styleovertrend wrote:

For me, small lies are lies. Lying to save hurt feeelings is lying. Also, embellishing a story so it contains things that didn't happen is lying as well as leaving out certain details when asked is being deceptive, which I consider lying. I would rather have someone tell me that they don't want to tell me something instead of offering me a lie. 

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@Styleovertrend 

I guess I’m pretty lucky. Just about the only time I think about whether people are lying is when I watch the news... The people in my real life are pretty honest. I don’t need to think about definitions.

I’ve had dishonest people in my life in the past and that is why they are no longer in my life. 

[chessylady]

@willdob3 well said!

[Jordan2]

I think little white lies, to save someone from hurt feelings is okay. I mean why be cruel to someone, it's easier to just lie a little to spare them. I don't like lying about the bigger things, I always try to tell the truth, and want the truth to be told to me. I feel like I have a fatal flaw, I don't like to lie, I sometimes think I'm too honest for my own good. Case in point, my mother passed away in January, I had to call a credit card company to question something. I told the customer rep I was her daughter, she tells me I can't talk to you (I told her my mother was deceased). I say to her I could have lied to you and said I was my mother, she says I appreciate that but I still can't talk to you. I later called and said I was my mother and got it taken care of.

[Sooner]

How about sometimes when people come here to "clarify" what someone said or say something that on the surface is nice but is really a shot at another poster. 

Or when you post things bragging and it isn't really true. . . things like that.