What are Men's Expectations when it comes to Datin... - Page 8

Marcail0825 · ‎10-16-2014

@ROMARY wrote:
@DoneTryin wrote:
Read Steve Harvey's book Act Like a Lady, Think Like a Man. I read it several years ago & wished I'd realized all that a looooonnnnnnnggggggg time ago.

Nothing changes: Men want a lady for the long haul, so we have to determine how long to hold out so they will know we aren't just one-night stands. That's going to depend on your moral standards & female instincts.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Excellent suggestion!

Steve Harvey doesn't exactly have a great track record.

Marcail0825 · ‎10-16-2014

@Plaid Pants2 wrote:
@DiscountDiva wrote:
I am certain I want a relationship. I don't know if now or in the near future. I know for a fact I want to spend my life with someone.

Then relax. It'll happen when it happens.

We all would like to spend our lives with someone, but that does not neccessairly mean marriage.

We can spend our lives with friends.

You need to be fulfilled with yourself.

Don't go looking for any man to "compleate" you.

You need to compleate yourself.

When you are happy with yourself, then it doesn't matter if a man is in the picture or not.

This isn't the 1950's anymore.

A woman can be just as happy, just as fulfilled without a man in her life.

Good advice @Plaid Pants2.

Marcail0825 · ‎10-16-2014

@NC Bandwagon wrote:
Hello, DiscountDiva.

Don't know if this will help, but I'll post the best I can.

1. Never play mind games. A good man hates mind games. Actually, almost everyone hates mind games.

2. Men love a good meal. So if you want to get married one day, learn how to be a good cook. Tip: Most men love meat.

3. Don't let him pressure you into doing anything you don't want to do. A good man won't expect a good woman to be easy. If he wants you to be easy, he's probably no good for you.

4. DON'T lower your expectations.

5. If you do end up getting married one day, be sure to tell him that you love him often. Not all men may be lovely dovey, but just like any good person, they like and need to be told that they're loved, wanted and needed.

Well, that's all I can think of really. Though, there's probably women on here who have better advice. Hope it goes well for you.

I agree, very well said @NC Bandwagon.

Marcail0825 · ‎10-16-2014

@dooBdoo wrote:
@DiscountDiva wrote:
Well I want a man. I know I don't need one but I am not ashamed to admit that I won't feel complete without one. I know a lot of people feel differently and I respect that. But I don't want to be alone.

If I could impart one thing to you, @JBKO, it would be that it's essential to feel complete by yourself. Allow others to be a complement to you and your life, but not to "complete you." If you need another person to complete you, that means you aren't whole. I think the best gift we can give to ourselves is to learn to love who we are and to be okay, strong, and at peace in our own company. Once you achieve that, as you meet men you'll know what your expectations are (remember, your expectations are important) and also you'll have a good instinct about how you want to interact with them.

I always found the best thing was to make friends with people who share some of your interests, and a great way to do that is to put yourself in places where those people will be. Volunteer work, classes, etc., involving things that matter to you and reflect who you are will put you in a place with men who share the same values and interests.

I wish you well.

^^^^This as well. @JBKO Hope you take all the good advice on this thread from so many to heart.

Marcail0825 · ‎10-16-2014

@Goldengate8361 wrote:
I strongly urge you to own your own power. Don't be so concerned about men's expectations. Really. Focus on your preferences and act accordingly. Men are totally replaceable. If he doesn't like your preferences, be grateful that he disclosed who he is and his sincere intentions. Don't even blink...move on to the next one. I am 54 and, yes, I'm in the dating world. My experience is that most middle aged men are very nice and well intentioned--and, frankly, a bit needy. I've found that the traditional secks roles common in the 20s are now pretty much reversed! It's a great age (50s) to be a female in the dating world!

Great post!

SeaMaiden · ‎03-10-2010

I never understood where a woman would feel obliged to have sex ever with someone unless she CHOSE to. Third date, 16 date, 6 month date. Why would that have any say on when you have relations?

It is sad that women let them selves get used in such a way. I never felt I needed anyone that much. I dated a lot of men years ago and never slept with them. I could care less if they left. Some did......I just said goodby. I never needed a man ever to support me, or tell me what to do. I would suppose it is the women who feel they are incomplete without a man.

VaBelle35 · ‎03-10-2010

Just because a book author doesn't have a fantastic track record in relationship (think of John Gray and his ex-wife who both write books on relationships), doesn't mean their advice isn't relevant.

I don't read relationship books as if they are hard and fast rules to follow. I think these books all give you some ideas to think about in relation to your own actions and thoughts where men are concerned. Areas of your life that can benefit from a little self inspection and reflection ;o)

You can keep doing the same thing and getting the same result. Or you can look outward for new ideas and see if things change.

===================================
QVC Shopper - 1993

# IAMTEAMWEN

Marcail0825 · ‎10-16-2014

@VaBelle35 wrote:
Just because a book author doesn't have a fantastic track record in relationship (think of John Gray and his ex-wife who both write books on relationships), doesn't mean their advice isn't relevant.

I don't read relationship books as if they are hard and fast rules to follow. I think these books all give you some ideas to think about in relation to your own actions and thoughts where men are concerned. Areas of your life that can benefit from a little self inspection and reflection ;o)

You can keep doing the same thing and getting the same result. Or you can look outward for new ideas and see if things change.

But @VaBelle35, getting advice from a guy with a bad track record is like "don't do as I do, do as I say"?

VaBelle35 · ‎03-10-2010

@Marcail0825 wrote:
@VaBelle35 wrote:
Just because a book author doesn't have a fantastic track record in relationship (think of John Gray and his ex-wife who both write books on relationships), doesn't mean their advice isn't relevant.

I don't read relationship books as if they are hard and fast rules to follow. I think these books all give you some ideas to think about in relation to your own actions and thoughts where men are concerned. Areas of your life that can benefit from a little self inspection and reflection ;o)

You can keep doing the same thing and getting the same result. Or you can look outward for new ideas and see if things change.

But @VaBelle35, getting advice from a guy with a bad track record is like "don't do as I do, do as I say"?

I'm not advating taking his advice (or anyone elses for that matter, professional or otherwise).

I'm simply saying that reading what John has to say and reflecting on the idea(s) in relation to your own life is something to consider.

Think of it as food for thought vs advice.

===================================
QVC Shopper - 1993

# IAMTEAMWEN