Community Chat

[Moonchilde]

Maaany of the tabloid threads were a type of baiting. I think that's one reason QVC said not on the new forum. Posting anything tabloidish is almost guaranteed to go into trashing, racism, inappropriate language and insults. It's pretty much a given.

[Moonchilde]

LOL surfk I love your analogies ;-)

[Say Nay]

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@Moonchilde wrote:
Maaany of the tabloid threads were a type of baiting. I think that's one reason QVC said not on the new forum. Posting anything tabloidish is almost guaranteed to go into trashing, racism, inappropriate language and insults. It's pretty much a given.

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They said that? I missed it. Sometimes people posted celebrity news like stories about William and Kate which I found interesting since I never read it elsewhere. 

[HisElk]

In one word - my ex.  He's the president of that club. 

[Moonchilde]

What they said, Smaug, was nothing even potentially controversial or likely to turn into something contentious where name-calling, insults over difference of opinion, who can out-trash who, any politics or religion. And while an OP may start out perfectly fine (you gave a great example) there were always those who took delight in posting deletable comments such that a nice thread was trashed by people just because they could get away with it.

I have seen a few threads (including one in the christening) that were good, because IMO that's the kind of thread where they are liable to delete the smart-a posts and let everyone else enjoy.

Previously, there were people who routinely OP'd clearly controversial threads with "what do you all think?" but not giving an opinion of their own until hair-pulling and shin-kicking was under way in the thread - as they knew would occur. QVC is very quick to ****** such in the bud now.

LOL - the asterisks used the word that goes with tuck. Guess the auto-censor is tetchy about it.

[sallybusky]

OMG Scotttie, you are dead ON with the Marie Barone example.  She is the Queen of Passive-Aggressive Behavior!  

[amaivy]

Easy!  The drivers in Silicon Valley CA.

[LTT1]

@RainCityWoman... The student you described in your post... The one who does nothing even while knowing the consequences...
IMO the person who uses this technique has motive. His would be a"control" issue, right?
I need to ask myself "what does this person want?" Like the mom in "Everybody Loves Raymond" her issue is that she wants more of Raymond's time/attention.
The student would seem to just want to get out of doing class work, but it would be good to know that his issue might really be rebelling against home.
I did have a student with this exact issue, too. 💜

[sandy53]

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@RainCityWoman wrote:

I guess I have a different picture of passive aggressiveness as a teacher. My observations have been in the student who very calmly ignores, dismisses, and refuses to do assignments, participate, meet deadlines,  knowing full well that there will be punihment at home. There is no flair of temper, no verbal abuse...just a calm, silent rejection of the situation.  It was the one thing that a student would know his parents couldn't control, regardless of what the end result would be. In the student's mind, he or she had won the battle no matter what he faced at home.

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When I was teaching, I saw many high school boys exhibit this kind of passive-aggressive behavior.  They would cut it so close to not graduating because they knew it would cause such a stir.  Parents would rant and rave, teachers and counselors would bend over backwards to offer help, and the student would just sit there acting smug.  Then they would usually finally do the minimum to pass the class. 

I think passive-aggressive behavior can be either conscious or subconscious.  Some do it with the intent to hurt someone, but others have this kind of behavior ingrained deeply in their behavior patterns and don't recognize it in themselves. 

[LTT1]

And then we have Ghandi-- his was passive resistance (non-violence). Maybe the aggressive part has to do with intent?
My student who put off graduation had his mother tearing her hair out over his seeming oblivion to consequences of not graduating. I am not completely sure of his motives ... But this is what he wanted. I only once saw the break into overt aggressiveness-- it wasn't pretty. Caution here