Community Chat

[dooBdoo]

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KittyLouWhoToo wrote:

While discussing various groups to donate (or not) to, a friend of mine said  (paraphrasing) "in the end it's not about where the money ends up, particularly if the donation isn't a large one, it's about what was in your heart when you gave it - you have no control over what others do with it".

I thought he made a good point.

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        @QueenDanceALot, I agree with that philosophy.

[dooBdoo]

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@MaggieMack wrote:

"Be an encourager. The world has enough critics already."  Dave Willis

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        Love that one, too, @MaggieMack!   It's hard to always be positive or encouraging, we're human and we fail as often as we succeed, but it's a good reminder to keep trying.

        Thanks for the thread, @CrazyDaisy!   This is actually "Random Acts of Kindness Week" (2/14 - 2/20), so we have plenty of time!   I remember first hearing of this trend back in the early 1990s when some friends from San Francisco told me about the "legend" of Ann Herbert's "practice random kindness and senseless acts of beauty" found on a placemat in the 1980s and shared "virally" long before internet viral memes were invented.

[Trinity11]

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@CrazyDaisy wrote:

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@151949 wrote:

I'm sorry but I think this is the stupidest thing I have ever heard of. First of all I seriously doubt that the clerk at the Mc Donalds window does anything with that money that is left but pockets it 90% of the time. And who is to say you aren't giving your money to buy a coffee for a multimillionaire? I prefer to direct my donations to where they are needed. My random acts of kindness are much more likely going to go to homeless or terribly poor in my community or if I would see a soldier I may buy his/her meal.

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To each thier own...have a great day.

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Daisy, you truly have grace and I think what you did today and how you restrained yourself in answering 151949 was a teaching moment. I respect you immensely. And thanks for the thread..... good reminder to give back.

[dooBdoo]

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@Trinity11 wrote:

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@CrazyDaisy wrote:

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@151949 wrote:

I'm sorry but I think this is the stupidest thing I have ever heard of. First of all I seriously doubt that the clerk at the Mc Donalds window does anything with that money that is left but pockets it 90% of the time. And who is to say you aren't giving your money to buy a coffee for a multimillionaire? I prefer to direct my donations to where they are needed. My random acts of kindness are much more likely going to go to homeless or terribly poor in my community or if I would see a soldier I may buy his/her meal.

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To each thier own...have a great day.

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Daisy, you truly have grace and I think what you did today and how you restrained yourself in answering 151949 was a teaching moment. I respect you immensely. And thanks for the thread..... good reminder to give back.

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       I totally agree with you, @Trinity11.   @CrazyDaisy responded to the harsh criticism with grace and restraint...  I really need to learn to do that in a better way, myself.   Lovely post, @Trinity11.

[Trinity11]

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@dooBdoo wrote:

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@Trinity11 wrote:

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@CrazyDaisy wrote:

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@151949 wrote:

I'm sorry but I think this is the stupidest thing I have ever heard of. First of all I seriously doubt that the clerk at the Mc Donalds window does anything with that money that is left but pockets it 90% of the time. And who is to say you aren't giving your money to buy a coffee for a multimillionaire? I prefer to direct my donations to where they are needed. My random acts of kindness are much more likely going to go to homeless or terribly poor in my community or if I would see a soldier I may buy his/her meal.

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To each thier own...have a great day.

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Daisy, you truly have grace and I think what you did today and how you restrained yourself in answering 151949 was a teaching moment. I respect you immensely. And thanks for the thread..... good reminder to give back.

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       I totally agree with you, @Trinity11.   @CrazyDaisy responded to the harsh criticism with grace and restraint...  I really need to learn to do that in a better way, myself.   Lovely post, @Trinity11.

Thanks, dooBdoo.

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[Cakers3]

There is never a guarantee that one's act of kindness or donation to a charity is ever used the way it was meant to be. 

If everyone doubted the kindness of others, we would have a very sad and sorry world above and beyond what it can be today at times - not always, but at times.

It seems when a nice idea is presented there is always a voice of dissention - perhaps not being engaged in kindness reflects resentment that no one has ever paid it forward for that person. 

To doubt any act of kindness - whether buying a cup of kindness or donating to a food bank or buying a meal for a soldier - is to cast a shadow over what that person claims to do in his/her corner of the world.

Kindness comes from the heart; to declaire that this thread is not worthy of belief only leads to doubt about the worthiness of what somebody else does instead.

I don't consider this a bragging thread but a gentle reminder that there are many people out there filled with holes of loneliness and heartache.  To drive up and learn that somebody just bought them a cup of coffee can make all the difference in the world.

Nobody knows everyone's story; the negativity about acts of kindness is a clear indication that this world will always be striving to be better against some very disheeartening odds.

[dooBdoo]

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Cakers wrote:

There is never a guarantee that one's act of kindness or donation to a charity is ever used the way it was meant to be. 

If everyone doubted the kindness of others, we would have a very sad and sorry world above and beyond what it can be today at times - not always, but at times.

It seems when a nice idea is presented there is always a voice of dissention - perhaps not being engaged in kindness reflects resentment that no one has ever paid it forward for that person. 

To doubt any act of kindness - whether buying a cup of kindness or donating to a food bank or buying a meal for a soldier - is to cast a shadow over what that person claims to do in his/her corner of the world.

Kindness comes from the heart; to declaire that this thread is not worthy of belief only leads to doubt about the worthiness of what somebody else does instead.

I don't consider this a bragging thread but a gentle reminder that there are many people out there filled with holes of loneliness and heartache.  To drive up and learn that somebody just bought them a cup of coffee can make all the difference in the world.

Nobody knows everyone's story; the negativity about acts of kindness is a clear indication that this world will always be striving to be better against some very disheeartening odds.

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        What a thoughtful, beautiful post, @Cakers3.  

        The way we react to something -- a topic, a post, etc. -- really can be a reflection of something it triggers inside us, something we might not even be aware of.   We might even project subconscious feelings onto the other person, thinking they have motives or intent that's truly a far cry from their actual motives or intent.   (Sorry for the psychobabble -- I've been in therapy too long, lived with a therapist a long time.)  

        When someone hurts me, I definitely feel it, and wince, and withdraw for a wee bit of a minute.   But then I try very hard to think about why they did it, and to realize they might be striking out because of their own pain.   In other words, the negativity we see or feel isn't usually about us -- it's about them.

        I'm not a big fan of sharing stories about what I've done, and I know that's a personal preference.   But I do like to share stories about others who have acted kindly, charitably, lovingly.   Often, by learning what others have done, we can get new ideas and "pay it forward" in new ways.

        Thanks for your post.  Very touching.

[PenneyT]

I try to go by: "Better to be the one who smiles than the one who doesn't smile back."

Happily, most smile back! (I've had times in my life when the smiles from strangers gave me enough of a boost to keep going. I am truly blessed.)

[MaggieMack]

I have never looked at people on these boards who post about a particular kindness they did as being braggarts, we're all anonymous. I think kindness generates kindness, and always welcome hearing what others have done, it gives me ideas on spreading kindness. And that's a good thing.