WOW, funeral costs now a days - Page 10

Nuttmeg · ‎03-09-2010

@Plaid Pants2 wrote:
My dad is 88 years old, and as much as I hate the thought, he will be gone one day.

I just looked at a local creamatory, and their prices aren't too bad.

www.ayerscremation.com

My main concern wnat happens to your dad's ashes. You may decide to move then what. Money is a concern for everyone, but what does your father want.

Plaid Pants2 · ‎03-14-2015

@Nuttmeg wrote:
@Plaid Pants2 wrote:
My dad is 88 years old, and as much as I hate the thought, he will be gone one day.

I just looked at a local creamatory, and their prices aren't too bad.

www.ayerscremation.com

My main concern wnat happens to your dad's ashes. You may decide to move then what. Money is a concern for everyone, but what does your father want.

My dad and I have talked about his final wishes, because I do want to honor them. He wants his ashes scattered by redwood trees.

If I move, I move. He doesn't want me dragging his ashes around from place to place.

Besides, if I ever want to visit with him, all I would have to do is just look inside my heart. I don't need a physical place in order to visit with my dad.

SydneyH · ‎03-10-2010

$4500 is pretty inexpensive imo...........

Financialgrl · ‎03-13-2010

My mother died 40 years ago and she had the whole nine yards, visitation, services at church and graveside. Dad bought a double plot with the family name and her plaque was put in place when she died ($350 in 1976 and today that plot would have been close to $4000). Dad died in 2012.

We knew and followed his wishes when he died. He wanted cremated, NO service of any kind and his ashes buried next to my mother. THe plot was already paid for but even just his cremation, opening/closing of the grave, and marker plate with his info STILL was close to $5000. Cremation here runs about $3000 so I'm thinking if one wants cremated and ashes scattered, thats about as cheap as a funeral could be. I made arrangements to have his cremains buried (my BF and I attended) and in the spring, after a few of the grandkids came home from college my siblings, their spouses and children all drove to the site, placed flowers on our parents' gravesite and went out to lunch for a celebration of both parents' lives. I believe we honored our father's wishes and he would have been happy with what we did.

shorelady · ‎03-10-2010

I buried my beloved DH last year and will not quote you the cost. I believe everyone should do what they want to do without snitty remarks from others like "you must have been crazy or I certainly wouldn't do that". It was what we wanted and no one else's business.

But I will address the Costco casket statement. A friend attended a funeral where there was a Costco "cheap" casket. Well it seems that the grave was opened for the standard casket size. The Costco casket was a bit larger. The family was trying to push the casket into the opening. Eventually they removed the casket. At that time, my friend left because the whole experience was turning into a mockery of the deceased's burial. So maybe that is why some funeral homes may not allow a bargain casket or a casket not purchased from them. Why should they assume responsibility for burial of a casket not purchased from them? I highly doubt Costco came out to extend the grave size. At least if a casket is purchased from the funeral home, they can bear the responsibility if anything goes wrong. Saving money is great, but sometimes common sense should prevail.

Bestdressed · ‎04-18-2010

@YorkieonmyPillow wrote:
@MaggieMack wrote:

@henderson wrote:
Please consider whole body donation if you want to be cremated. I registered with Science Care (Phoenix, Az.) to donate my body after my organs are donated. There is no cost, they will arrange to transport the body from your local funeral home and then after cremation, return the remains to you. Whole body donations are so needed to help find cures for diseases.
Please, before you commit to "donating your body to science," read the book Stiff by Mary Roach. She details all of the various ways the donated bodies are used, and most of them are not only not pretty, but pretty awful. I used to have the same altruistic dream of having my body used for higher purposes, but this book changed my mind. In one quick minute.
Ditto.
I wouldn't consider it. A person's mortal remains are sacred to me. I don't view dead bodies like an automobile salvage yard, where parts are picked over and used for this or that.

Even a cat or a dog deserves a decent burial - whether that be cremation, burial, or whatever.

I would never allow any relative of mine's body to be exploited in such a manner. I wouldn't even allow a deceased pet to be used for this, much less a member of my family.

For those who see nothing wrong with it, more power to you. Not me or mine.

There are ways to cut down on final expenses - graveside viewing, etc.

A different point of view...

One of my best friend's suffered a 9 year brutal battle with cancer. When she died, she donated her body to science to help find a cure. They did not keep her body. They took whatever organs and tissue samples needed and then cremated her body and returned the ashes back to her mother.

She had no service or funeral. Friends and family had a memorial party for her a few months after she died. I was out of town when she died and never felt like I said goodbye. When her mother died 2 years later, I attended the gravside service. Her ashes were placed inside her mothers casket. It made me feel so good to see she was back together with her mother.

151949 · ‎03-09-2010

When you buy a casket from a funeral home it is bought from them - the cemetary is who opens the grave and puts in the cement lockbox. So - one really has little to do with the other as they are 2 separate businesses. Also, cemetaries do not actually lower the casket into the grave until after everyone has left, so I doubt the family was "trying to push the casket into the grave".

patbz · ‎03-10-2010

I lost my parents in 1999 and 2002. They both opted to be cremated and buried in Arlington. Even with transporting my mother's remains from CA. and 2 receptions at the Officers Club at Fort Myer, the total for 2 funerals was $6000. Btw my Dad's funeral rivaled JFKs (only his horses were black not white. If your relative is entitled to burial in a National Cemetery, don't overlook this option.

tuscaloosa · ‎03-23-2010

@151949 wrote:
My dad was a WW11 vet, my parents had purchased themselves a masoleum and they are interred there. My Dad was a decorated vet with a bronze star and a silver star plus a purple heart. At his funeral in 1991, the VA provided the casket, an honor guard as pall bearers, a 21 gun salute, taps and the flag. In other words , everything he would have had at Arlington had he chosen to be buried there.
I would not have ever asked for all that but , since they preplanned their funerals, he must have asked for it all. It was torture to sit through it all as it is very sad and truly emphasizes the loss. For me, it just brought back 1967 and burying my brother at Arlington after he was killed in Viet nam.

Sorry about your losses. Although I did not have a loved one die in Viet Nam I still experience pain from our many fatalities. Viet Nam is a painful subject.