Community Chat

[Scooby Doo]

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wrote:

I too see both sides. I understand the aspect of not being able to say no, and respecting peoples’ wishes.

But, two things - first, this is an elementary school, where children are supposed to learn social basics, including being kind and considerate to others. It’s in elementary school that you can teach children to be kind to the disabled, the mentally challenged, or those just “different” in some way. If they don’t learn it in elementary school, it’s too late. The parents? Sure, they should teach this, but many, maybe even most, do not, because they don’t feel that way themselves - they too would pass by, shun or ridicule those different. So with parents out of the equation many times, at least the school is making an effort.

Second - this takes place in an extremely religiously conservative state. Doubtful that much boy-asking-girl occurs, and everyone would have a heart attack if a boy asked a boy or a girl asked a girl. So, those things most likely would not have ever been an issue at this school. Just my personal opinion here, but I think most females who reside in Utah are taught from birth that they are subservient and second class. Those who would really fight that will run into a brick wall as long as they live in Utah. The state and its people are not going to change.

It sounds to me as if the school is trying to do a good thing, within the context of living in Utah.

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Wow.  You really need to turn your watch ahead a couple of decades.  My great grandmother might have had that experience, but the younger generation especially won't buy that ******.  I've lived in Utah my whole life and I don't know anybody in that situation. 

This community is one of the fastest growing cities in Utah.  It is near Hill Air Force Base, which employees over 20,000 people, and attracts a diverse culture.

[on the bay]

I do think it is better at the elementary level to have group dances-do the hokey pokey, square dancing, line dancing etc.

If they insist on the individual dances I think if a boy asked me I would never say no and hurt his feelings.

However if I didn't want to dance at all, that is something else, I would just say I'm not dancing. But to pick and choose is kind of hurtful.

Rejecting someone who asks you to dance causes a lot of hurt and embarassment.

I don't think they should have this kind of dance at all-too much pressure, awkwardness and embarassment, and feeling uncomfortable on both sides.

[colliegirls]

I sure wish every boy I asked to dance had to dance with me when I was young!!!!  There would have been no hurt feelings or tears at the end of the evening!!  haha

[colliegirls]

It is an elementary school, the dances should be tame and there shouldn't be any "romantic" gestures allowed at this age.

[qbetzforreal]

What if a girl wants to ask a boy to dance?  Wonder if that's possible?  Do the boys have to ask all the girls to dance?  This is weird.  I understand wanting to teach manners but how starting with "no thank you."

[Moonchilde]

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wrote:

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wrote:

I too see both sides. I understand the aspect of not being able to say no, and respecting peoples’ wishes.

But, two things - first, this is an elementary school, where children are supposed to learn social basics, including being kind and considerate to others. It’s in elementary school that you can teach children to be kind to the disabled, the mentally challenged, or those just “different” in some way. If they don’t learn it in elementary school, it’s too late. The parents? Sure, they should teach this, but many, maybe even most, do not, because they don’t feel that way themselves - they too would pass by, shun or ridicule those different. So with parents out of the equation many times, at least the school is making an effort.

Second - this takes place in an extremely religiously conservative state. Doubtful that much boy-asking-girl occurs, and everyone would have a heart attack if a boy asked a boy or a girl asked a girl. So, those things most likely would not have ever been an issue at this school. Just my personal opinion here, but I think most females who reside in Utah are taught from birth that they are subservient and second class. Those who would really fight that will run into a brick wall as long as they live in Utah. The state and its people are not going to change.

It sounds to me as if the school is trying to do a good thing, within the context of living in Utah.

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Wow.  You really need to turn your watch ahead a couple of decades.  My great grandmother might have had that experience, but the younger generation especially won't buy that ******.  I've lived in Utah my whole life and I don't know anybody in that situation. 

This community is one of the fastest growing cities in Utah.  It is near Hill Air Force Base, which employees over 20,000 people, and attracts a diverse culture.

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The fact that it attracts (though I wouldn’t use that word) a diverse culture is probably why this was even brought up by the girl’s mother in the first place. They’re probably not from Utah.

[SahmIam]

Nope. And that's from all my ways of looking at it. Then again, I'm anti "everyone gets a trophy" when it comes to sports, so....yeah.

[Goldengate8361]

Horrible. Ridiculous. Insulting. I will refrain from saying anything about Utah.

[maestra]

If you dont like the rules set down, dont have your child attend.  Simple.

[september]

I had a friend whose daughter went to a private k-8 school and at the 8th grade dance, this was also the rule. 

On the other hand, there was no such rule at my daughter's public middle school   There were several boys there who she was bothered by.  I would have objected (and so would she!) If she was forced to dance with them.