Community Chat

[pattypeep]

I find it ironic that the colors red, white, and blue stand for
freedom, until they're flashing behind you.

Today a man knocked on my door and asked for a small donation towards the local swimming pool, so I gave him a glass of water.

I changed my password to "incorrect" so whenever I forget it the computer will say, "Your password is incorrect."

Artificial intelligence is no match for natural stupidity.

I'm great at multi-tasking--I can waste time, be unproductive, and procrastinate all at once.

If you can smile when things go wrong, you have someone in mind to blame.

Never tell your problems to anyone, because 20 percent don't care and the other 80 percent are glad you have them.

Doesn't expecting the unexpected mean that the unexpected is actually expected?

Take my advice — I'm not using it.

I hate it when people use big words just to make themselves sound perspicacious.

Hospitality is the art of making guests feel like they're at home when you wish they were.

Television may insult your intelligence, but nothing rubs it in like a computer.

I bought a vacuum cleaner six months ago and so far all it's been doing is gathering dust.

Every time someone comes up with a foolproof solution, along comes a more-talented fool.

I'll bet you $4,567 you can't guess how much I owe my bookie.

There may be no excuse for laziness, but I'm still looking.

Give me ambiguity or give me something else.

He who laughs last thinks slowest.

Is it wrong that only one company makes the game Monopoly?

Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.

The grass may be greener on the other side but at least you don't have to mow it.

I like long walks, especially when they're taken by people who annoy me.

I was going to wear my camouflage shirt today, but I couldn't find it.

If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you.

If tomatoes are technically a fruit, is ketchup a smoothie?

Money is the root of all wealth.

No matter how much you push the envelope, it'll still be stationery.

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[BirdieGal]

👍🏻👍🏻👍🏻

[on the bay]

@pattypeep-

Oh my gosh!

My cat is staring at me like what is wrong with you?!🐈

I laughed at every single one. These are some of the funniest I've read-thanks for the great laugh today!

[blackhole99]

Yes, all that indeed is true, I still feel if all people had their basic needs met things would go much smoother for everyone.

[beckyb1012]

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@pattypeep wrote:

I'm great at multi-tasking--I can waste time, be unproductive, and procrastinate all at once.

@pattypeep Love it all but the one above just proves what I knew all along about myself.  I am so good at multi-tasking.

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[Susan Louise]

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@BirdieGal wrote:

👍🏻👍🏻👍🏻

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@BirdieGal  What are your posts with these symbols supposed to mean?

[Susan Louise]

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@beckyb1012 wrote:

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@pattypeep wrote:

I'm great at multi-tasking--I can waste time, be unproductive, and procrastinate all at once.

@pattypeep Love it all but the one above just proves what I knew all along about myself.  I am so good at multi-tasking.

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@beckyb1012  @pattypeep  That is THE trifecta of multitasking

[BirdieGal]

@Susan Louise

They are thumbs up. Which means I like your post. It was early for me when I posted and before coffee. Sorry that was all I could manage. ❤️

[Susan Louise]

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@BirdieGal wrote:

@Susan Louise

They are thumbs up. Which means I like your post. It was early for me when I posted and before coffee. Sorry that was all I could manage. ❤️

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@BirdieGal  Thanks for explaining! Since I can't duplicate that symbol on my 10 yr old laptop, I had no way of even googling to find out for myself...LOL

[Susan Louise]

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@Susan Louise wrote:

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@BirdieGal wrote:

@Susan Louise

They are thumbs up. Which means I like your post. It was early for me when I posted and before coffee. Sorry that was all I could manage. ❤️

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@BirdieGal  Thanks for explaining! Since I can't duplicate that symbol on my 10 yr old laptop, I had no way of even googling to find out for myself...LOL

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@BirdieGal  I just realized something...you probably still see your thumbs up symbols on your mobile device. This is what I see them as on my laptop...hth