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Re: Tom Brokaw

And what if you're a single mother supporting kids? Quit your job, go on welfare, and get criticized for that? It's easy when you have two incomes, when you have never been in that situation, to say what other women should do. I don't do that-because while I have been harassed, I didn't have to take the job because I didn't have kids to support.

 

For all these movie and tv stories there are countless stories of non famous hard working women. The men who have power over them know that they depend in these jobs and they take advantage of that fact.

"I carry your heart, I carry it in my heart"
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Re: Tom Brokaw

If my daughter wasn't living at home protected by her parents, it could have been a lot worse for her, than it was. It wasn't pleasant by any means , and she knew that her father and I were behind her

 

These type of men ,and perhaps women too, seem to have a sort of built in radar, on who they target. I'm sure my daughters innocence/youth was one of the reasons they chose her, besides her looks too..they never knew she has a stainless steel backbone

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Re: Tom Brokaw

I have no clue as to whether Brokaw did anything inappropriate. It doesn't sound as if any act did occur, although of course if true, his actions were brutish.

 

But for those who just can't believe it about him because of his persona, do I have mention another man whose persona could not have been more different than the reality of his exploitive and illegal actions? Where were you all yesterday?

 

Times have changed. For some of you to outright deny a woman's allegation because she didn't speak up at the time is a denial of the culture that is just beginning now to change. Easy to sit on high making judgments against those women.


~Who in the world am I? Ah, that's the great puzzle~ Lewis Carroll, Alice in Wonderland
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Re: Tom Brokaw

[ Edited ]

This may be crude but my Dad always told my sister and I if any man does something inappropriate to you....kick em .....you know where.  I am hoping the young women of today will observe closely.  I rather imagine most of these women who kept quiet regret not coming forward earlier.  It might have saved another woman a lifetime of distress.

 

Edited this to say, in no way do I blame these women. We need to teach our daughters that no one but no one has the right to touch you inappropriately.  Sadly, many of these women were drugged and looked on Bill Cosby as a father figure. In Bill Cosby's case I rather imagine, as young as they were, they may have just thought he that he was inviting them in because he saw special talent in them and offered to help them in their careers.  Little did many of them know what he really had in mind. Young girls can be pretty naive. What if it would have been your daughter?

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Re: Tom Brokaw

@Tinkrbl44 Luckily I worked for a pretty ethical company in which people could speak up. Maybe my answer was naive, but men were fired for inappropriate behavior when women spoke up. I remember one basically nice guy who joked about being able to determine what type of panties were worn by the ladies in the plant based on the panty lines he saw from his office. He was let go and I actually felt bad because his behavior was boorish but I don't think it was threatening in any way.

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Re: Tom Brokaw


@Auntg wrote:

@Tinkrbl44 Luckily I worked for a pretty ethical company in which people could speak up. Maybe my answer was naive, but men were fired for inappropriate behavior when women spoke up. I remember one basically nice guy who joked about being able to determine what type of panties were worn by the ladies in the plant based on the panty lines he saw from his office. He was let go and I actually felt bad because his behavior was boorish but I don't think it was threatening in any way.


@Auntg, he created a hostile environment for women. That is enough for dismissal.


~Who in the world am I? Ah, that's the great puzzle~ Lewis Carroll, Alice in Wonderland
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Re: Tom Brokaw

Did I miss it?  I don't see where Tom Brokaw denied her work because she resisted his unwanted attention.  Men groping women if they think they can get away with it for years.  I'm not saying it's right but it also doesn't/shouldn't mean an old man's reputation should be ruined either.  The time to do it was then.  

 

Two decades is to long to wait bring this up just because it's in fashion right now.  Brokaw might have done what she said but imo, it's too little to bring up now about a 78 year old man.

 

 

"The quieter you become, the more you can hear". (By Ram Dass, an American Spiritual Teacher) \em>
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Re: Tom Brokaw

There will be more people speaking out soon, more than likely.  The dam was cracked and there will be no reason not to.  On the noon talk radio news, a reporter from a national news company was quoted to have said, she knew about this topic from stories her girl friends had relayed to her about their contact with him.

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Re: Tom Brokaw

[ Edited ]

@Burnsite wrote:

I don't know if anyone will agree, but I will say what I think about this issue, I and a number of people I know were assaulted by men in "professional" relations. 

 

But. . . I was also occasionally greeted by inappropriate remarks and tentative physical contact. To me, _ it is not the same thing_. 

 

Those things you decline,say, no don't do that again and it goes away. 

 

I have a problem with a woman who would bring up tickling or groping decades later.   Did the woman lack vocal cords and instincts to say no?

 

When "no" works and no law is broken, well, it's one thing to me; sexual assault and criminal offenses are, imo, another.  And if the accusation is a matter of a criminal offtense, it's best to wait for the trial and the verdict.

 

I super don't like judging people by their accusers alone.  That isn't the American way.  It's not fair.


***********  I agree that we should not jump on a case like this one without more evidence. You are so right.

 

In a case like Bill C. and some of the others..... when the numbers escalate to 5,10, 15, 20, 50  women, I don't think there is hardly any denying it.  Like you ....I wished these women would have spoken up years ago.  I imagine that these women who are finally coming forward have pricked the conscience of other women who have experienced this.  They are imparting their courage to others to finally do the right thing.

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Re: Tom Brokaw

[ Edited ]

In 1981 I was 23 and working as a secretary at Exxon Research & Engineering. I decided I wanted to go to sea on their deep-sea-going fleet of oil tankers, and I did. I became a member of the US Merchant Marine and began five years of amazing adventures. And unbelievable harassment.

 

What is interesting, though, is that the first time I was harassed - it was by a gay woman; a fellow crewmember. She left suggestive and sometimes explicit notes and candy on my bed, flirted with me, sought me out and would not leave me alone. It came to a head when she told me if I didn't sleep with her, she was going to wait for me one night at 3am (when I came off lookout on the bow) and bash my brains in with a monkey wrench and throw me over the side. She was careful about reminding me that by the time they realized I was missing and turned the ship around, I'd likely be drowned, lost, or eaten. 

 

This was on the first ship in my seagoing career. Out of a crew of 32, me included, the thirty men onboard acted like my big brothers or dads and came to my defense by telling this horrid woman to leave me alone or she would be reported to the corporate office.

 

Granted, the sense of community and isolation on a ship at sea is not something most people can relate to; there is a very interesting dynamic involved in having 32 personalities in virtual confinement together for months. BUT, I wanted to add my two cents and say that it is a power struggle that does not necessarily involve only men as the perpetrators.

 

I went on to have many, many harassment experiences - with a few other women and several men during the time I went to sea. I handled them all by keeping my cool, remaining professional yet telling them in NO UNCERTAIN TERMS that I was not interested and would not tolerate such attention. I took the high road and never screamed, swore or got verbally aggressive and it worked. I was never bothered twice by the same person. I could write a book on experiencing creative sexual harassment and how I got through it. 

 

Would I get a lawyer and try and charge any of these people today, 35 years later? Nope. The only thing I would have to gain from dredging up the past is money, and I'm not willing to allow my integrity to be dragged through the tabloids for money. If there had been a time to act, it was then - not now. Do I understand why some women are coming forward decades after the alleged incident? Sort of; I get the MeToo thing but I also think a statute of limitations is in order.

 

I will end by saying that in 1980, sexual harassment being against the law was just becoming a "thing". It honestly never occurred to me at that time that I had options. I was a strong, independent young woman in my early 20's and I handled it. Had any of my harassers taken things to the "next level", I might have acted differently. But I just saw these incidents as something that I needed to learn how to deal with. Deal with them I did; I stomped the advances flat and that was the end of them - until the next one. I stomped each fire as they flared and that was the end of them.