Community Chat

[raven-blackbird]

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@Imadickens wrote:

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@Sooner wrote:

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@Imadickens wrote:

I hope I don't offend anyone, but why would anyone choose to live in a place that is so dangerous! Don't quakes happen unannounced? In which case, turning off the gas won't be in time, right? Not just Calif, but tornado alley would worry me, too! Yes, we get blizzards and hurricanes but rarely do either of those kill massive amounts of people in our area! I understand living where you work, your family is, or even a place you love, but I don't think I could live in a place that could experience a quake! I pray that it won't happen and that you are all safe for a very, very long time! Good luck and God bless!

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Well, not everybody gets to choose where they live.  They have to live in certain places for a job, for the cost of living, because of family they have to take care of, because they can't afford to move, because their life is there and maybe has been for generations. . . 

We don't have the option to move.  I wish we did, but we don't.  And maybe the best answer is because it is "home" to them.

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Yes, I do realize those things, as I said in my post. I was a victim of living where my dad could make a living! Not always (or even sometimes!) where my mom and I wanted, but we got used to eating regularly! I remember once we lived in Illinois across from a corn field. I had learned in my former school that tornadoes hit flat plains first. Well, in Ill. we were under tornado warnings every night around dinner time! I was scared senseless the whole time we lived there! It was just that I know several people who chose to move there and I wondered what, besides jobs and family, would draw someone to a dangerous place to live!

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I'm not trying to be rude here...........but it really sounds like you live your life in fear...........and a great amount of it is really isn't even warranted..............................raven

[Moonchilde]

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@Imadickens wrote:

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@Sooner wrote:

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@Imadickens wrote:

I hope I don't offend anyone, but why would anyone choose to live in a place that is so dangerous! Don't quakes happen unannounced? In which case, turning off the gas won't be in time, right? Not just Calif, but tornado alley would worry me, too! Yes, we get blizzards and hurricanes but rarely do either of those kill massive amounts of people in our area! I understand living where you work, your family is, or even a place you love, but I don't think I could live in a place that could experience a quake! I pray that it won't happen and that you are all safe for a very, very long time! Good luck and God bless!

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Well, not everybody gets to choose where they live.  They have to live in certain places for a job, for the cost of living, because of family they have to take care of, because they can't afford to move, because their life is there and maybe has been for generations. . . 

We don't have the option to move.  I wish we did, but we don't.  And maybe the best answer is because it is "home" to them.

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Yes, I do realize those things, as I said in my post. I was a victim of living where my dad could make a living! Not always (or even sometimes!) where my mom and I wanted, but we got used to eating regularly! I remember once we lived in Illinois across from a corn field. I had learned in my former school that tornadoes hit flat plains first. Well, in Ill. we were under tornado warnings every night around dinner time! I was scared senseless the whole time we lived there! It was just that I know several people who chose to move there and I wondered what, besides jobs and family, would draw someone to a dangerous place to live!

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Near-perfect weather.  Year-round outdoor recreation. From surfing to skiing in a 2-1/2 hr drive.

it's not dangerous. That's just your perception - which is not reality for 95% of the state's happy residents.

[Imadickens]

@raven-blackbird  Yes, I have suffered from anxiety and phobias my whole life! It runs in my family as does depression, suicide, and cancer, but thank God, those have missed me so far! I went through therapy, took meds, and read every self-help book and researched every site on the Internet . It's not a great way to live, but we all face our own demons! I'm 95% better than I used to be, but I'd like to be rid of it! I don't know if that's even possible! The hardest part is that people like me know it's silly but we just can't help what we worry about! I could tell you and convince you that what I worry about will never happen! I just can't convince myself! But, even at its worst, I lived through it! For years I hid it, even from my family! "Mental illnesses " weren't spoken of. Then I found out how many people suffer with anxiety, etc. and other people stopped looking at it like it was so bad. Once you admit it, it really helps! So, there you have it! I've been to Hollywood, Ca. It was 1960. My parents and I took a train from Chicago to Ca. I remember how elegant everything was! After dinner, we'd go up in the dome car and watch the beautiful scenery! I was only five, but I remember how beautiful everything was! We went to Disneyland, my mother was on Queen for a Day, and my dad's boss owned a small yacht that we went out on! But, with all that, I remember most my dad helping me pick an orange off a tree marked, "Do Not Pick The Fruit". I was sure I'd be arrested! Kids are funny that way! But, especially, kids with OCD! lol

[Noel7]

@Imadickens

I'm sorry to read you've gone through so much, I know how debilitating anxiety can be, I have a good friend who has dealt with it for years.

She finally told her doctor about the problem and is now on a medication which has worked wonders for her.  She talks about how much her life has changed and everything is so much better for her.

I wish you the best.

[Imadickens]

@Moonchilde  Thank you for letting me know! Yes, I have had OCD most of my life, worse during my pregnancy (hormones!) but I have learned to cope! I really meant no offense to any "Califononians" lol I'm sure it's a wonderful place to live, beautiful, too. I just happen to like all four seasons , tho my joints aren't too wild about the colder seasons! So, for now, I'll stay put! If I had my wish, everyone would live where they love it and are really happy! It took me over 40 years to know I love living where I am! It's a shame to waste so many years only to realize you already have heaven on earth! Bloom where you are planted is one of the best sayings I ever heard!

[raven-blackbird]

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@Imadickens wrote:

@raven-blackbird  Yes, I have suffered from anxiety and phobias my whole life! It runs in my family as does depression, suicide, and cancer, but thank God, those have missed me so far! I went through therapy, took meds, and read every self-help book and researched every site on the Internet . It's not a great way to live, but we all face our own demons! I'm 95% better than I used to be, but I'd like to be rid of it! I don't know if that's even possible! The hardest part is that people like me know it's silly but we just can't help what we worry about! I could tell you and convince you that what I worry about will never happen! I just can't convince myself! But, even at its worst, I lived through it! For years I hid it, even from my family! "Mental illnesses " weren't spoken of. Then I found out how many people suffer with anxiety, etc. and other people stopped looking at it like it was so bad. Once you admit it, it really helps! So, there you have it! I've been to Hollywood, Ca. It was 1960. My parents and I took a train from Chicago to Ca. I remember how elegant everything was! After dinner, we'd go up in the dome car and watch the beautiful scenery! I was only five, but I remember how beautiful everything was! We went to Disneyland, my mother was on Queen for a Day, and my dad's boss owned a small yacht that we went out on! But, with all that, I remember most my dad helping me pick an orange off a tree marked, "Do Not Pick The Fruit". I was sure I'd be arrested! Kids are funny that way! But, especially, kids with OCD! lol

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@Imadickens  I'm sory you and your child have to deal with such fear.............but having said that...........certainly you must understand that when you make such strong statements like, why would anyone live there, that it has nothing to do with any factual danger.........but your own fear.

I do hope that you can get a handle on it all and live your life well, for not only your health, but your childs............children mimic and believe what they see and how they live...............good luck to you both.............................raven

[Imadickens]

@Noel7  Thank you! I'm glad your friend got help, it makes all the difference in the world! Many people don't for fear others will think they are "mentally ill"! That prevents them from getting help, so they suffer much longer than they need to! I'm glad now people understand more about it, but not nearly enough. But, with so many people suffering with it now, it's bound to get money for research! Having understanding friends helps a lot! She's lucky to have you!

p.s. me, too!

[JavaQueen]

I don't there is one place on the planet that is totally "safe." Natural disasters, etc. are part of living. It's just that in some areas, they show up more than others. 

There are tradeoffs. Cali has great weather. The flip side: earthquakes and landslides.

Sunny Florida draws millions, but then you have sweltering temperatures, hurricanes, tornadoes, etc. The Everglades is being drained slowly by all the water use. Ok, the Midwest doesn't have earthquakes (unless you are in area where fracking may increase its chances.) But then you have tornadoes in the summer and blizzards in the winter. NYC is a great place and the weather isn't too extreme, but then we have had our share of hurricanes, nor'easters, etc. Also, we have become a bullseye for terror attacks. When I was growing up, we also lived in fear of a nuclear holocaust.

The thing is that most of this is beyond our control. We chose to live and make choices. There are consequences with most choices and some of it we can't control. In the end, we can only confront that which comes our way. It is up to us to meet those challenges as best as we are able. Sometimes no amount of preparation is enough.

[Imadickens]

@raven-blackbird. I am really sorry if my comment was offensive, I didn't mean it that way! It began as an honest question. I seriously wondered why people choose to live places that have such obstacles. Like, was it the weather, scenery, cost of living, taxes, etc.?  I live where I am because my dad took a good job here, then I married a native of this small town who didn't k ow any better. For nearly50 years I longed to live with my family! I am an only child and all my family lived in Kentucky. They all shared holidays, fun weekends, birthdays, graduations, all the things I died to have! I said in one of my posts, I think I live on a worse fault than San Andreas! We even have a nuclear power plant on the fault! Yet, after years of wanting everything I didn't have I came to love what I did. It may have just been maturity! It does hurt to watch my children suffer with this, but I hope they learn sooner than I did how to cope. It's really no big secret, it's just a matter of keeping doing the things you worry about! Of course, it's harder than that, really, as we choose (not right word, really, but...) to worry about silly things, but ones that could happen, like quakes! It's hard to tell yourself how silly you are when the government puts out warnings! It takes time, but eventually you learn to "see" things as others do. It's not "natural" but if we do it long enough we forget we are "forcing " ourselves to be face or react normally! All that really matters is that we do!

It was hardest for me to watch my young children suffer. They are quite grown now and do try what I tell them. We still have terrible psychologists and psychiatrists here, but we keep getting them in every year. Someday we may have a few good ones!

[Noel7]

Nice post @JavaQueen

IMO the tradeoff is worth it.  I've lived in California and San Francisco most of my life with the exception of a few years as a toddler. 

We have it all here: the unbelievable coastal beauty and fishing, mountains, Yosemite, Muir Woods, great cities, opportunity and a lot of wealth in this state.  World famous universities, great food, diversity.

I've been through a lot of earthquakes and I'm still here.  DH and I were part of the team who went into the devastated Marina district to get people out after the quake of 89'.  That area took the worst hit because of soil movement, the rest of the city was in pretty good shape because of our strict building codes.