Community Chat

[brii]

I'm not going to use the Duggars or any reality show family to be my moral compass.

[Suziepeach]

Tell you what, I'd rather watch a Duggar wedding than another Kim K circus and family wedding.. what a joke!

I know people volunteer to help with the Duggar weddings but to each their own. There are some things about them that are odd but that's how they live..

[Mominohio]

On 2/26/2015 brii said:

I'm not going to use the Duggars or any reality show family to be my moral compass.

For me it isn't about using them as a moral compass, but it is about the fact that people are bombarded with negative, morally bankrupt, sleaze on TV, and any programming, whether fictional Little House, and Waltons, or large Christian families on reality programming is welcome as a balance to all the negative and evil.

Granted, no one has to watch TV if they find it morally lacking, but what is on that box has major influence on people young and old, and I'm glad there are some offerings that tout values of faith, conservative lifestyle, traditional family and values. In my opinion, it nowhere nearly balances out all the other type, but at least it is available for those looking to see people living closer to their own values than some mansion full of young women throwing themselves at one guy in hopes of getting married (really just getting their launch into more celebrity when the current show ends, 15 minutes of fame kind of thing).

[Tinkrbl44]

On 2/26/2015 mominohio said:

On 2/26/2015 brii said:

I'm not going to use the Duggars or any reality show family to be my moral compass.

For me it isn't about using them as a moral compass, but it is about the fact that people are bombarded with negative, morally bankrupt, sleaze on TV, and any programming, whether fictional Little House, and Waltons, or large Christian families on reality programming is welcome as a balance to all the negative and evil.

Granted, no one has to watch TV if they find it morally lacking, but what is on that box has major influence on people young and old, and I'm glad there are some offerings that tout values of faith, conservative lifestyle, traditional family and values. In my opinion, it nowhere nearly balances out all the other type, but at least it is available for those looking to see people living closer to their own values than some mansion full of young women throwing themselves at one guy in hopes of getting married (really just getting their launch into more celebrity when the current show ends, 15 minutes of fame kind of thing).

I understand your point, but I disagree on one thing ....

TV shows DO NOT influence my behavior ..... I am well aware they are fiction , and the so called reality shows (which I don't watch) are scripted and very contrived.

FYI, even Michelle Dugger has final say on editing (it's in her contract) and if she doesn't want something shown, it ends up on the editing room floor ..... so much for "nothing to hide".

[Tinkrbl44]

On 2/26/2015 mominohio said:

On 2/26/2015 Tinkrbl44 said:

On 2/25/2015 mominohio said:

I will just reaffirm what others here have said, sometimes it is entire churches that are invited to these types of weddings. I think it is fine, if people want to do that. They are supporting the new couple, and the institution of marriage, and that wasn't such a bad thing in days gone by.

I think more weddings need to have cake and punch in the church rec hall. I'm totally disgusted at the 'show' that weddings have become. The obscene amount of money spent, the sometimes years of planning, the over the top stress and striving for perfection to the point half the family is angry with each other. All just for more than half of the marriages to end in divorce anyway. No thanks.

Well. if that's what you want ... cake and punch in the church rec hall ... that's fine, but sometimes people want something nicer, and there's nothing wrong with that. Large weddings do serve at least one purpose ... they stimulate the local economy!

While I guess a large, expensive wedding could be called a "Hollywood Production" ...... a low budget wedding with close to a thousand people (and many children) is definitely a "circus" !!

Circus is the perfect description for many of the, what you want to see as 'nicer' weddings. What makes a wedding 'nice' isn't the elaborate gowns, venues, years salary worth of flowers etc. it is when the couple is truly committed to each other, and to their higher power, and to making a new family with values, and commitment. And that can happen in a court house with a couple of witnesses or among a thousand friends.

You seem to equate the money spent with 'nice', and that is just so wrong. I certainly think the economy could stand the hit of less big showy expensive weddings in trade for real and committed marriages.

No, I DON'T equate money spent with "nice" ..... and if people would like (and can afford to) have an expensive wedding that certainly doesn't mean the marriage isn't "real and committed".

One does not preclude the other!

[Mominohio]

On 2/26/2015 Tinkrbl44 said:

On 2/26/2015 mominohio said:

On 2/26/2015 brii said:

I'm not going to use the Duggars or any reality show family to be my moral compass.

For me it isn't about using them as a moral compass, but it is about the fact that people are bombarded with negative, morally bankrupt, sleaze on TV, and any programming, whether fictional Little House, and Waltons, or large Christian families on reality programming is welcome as a balance to all the negative and evil.

Granted, no one has to watch TV if they find it morally lacking, but what is on that box has major influence on people young and old, and I'm glad there are some offerings that tout values of faith, conservative lifestyle, traditional family and values. In my opinion, it nowhere nearly balances out all the other type, but at least it is available for those looking to see people living closer to their own values than some mansion full of young women throwing themselves at one guy in hopes of getting married (really just getting their launch into more celebrity when the current show ends, 15 minutes of fame kind of thing).

I understand your point, but I disagree on one thing ....

TV shows DO NOT influence my behavior ..... I am well aware they are fiction , and the so called reality shows (which I don't watch) are scripted and very contrived.

FYI, even Michelle Dugger has final say on editing (it's in her contract) and if she doesn't want something shown, it ends up on the editing room floor ..... so much for "nothing to hide".

I totally understand them (reality TV shows) not influencing your or my behavior (glad we are smarter than that!!), but they do have a big impact on what are considered societal norms and send distinct messages, and relay to the masses what is sensed to be 'normal" for society. When there are only certain choices available, with no counter offers of 'the other side' of behavior, values, morals, then we find the influences unbalanced and unfair, and potentially dangerous.

[Mominohio]

On 2/26/2015 Tinkrbl44 said:

On 2/26/2015 mominohio said:

On 2/26/2015 Tinkrbl44 said:

On 2/25/2015 mominohio said:

I will just reaffirm what others here have said, sometimes it is entire churches that are invited to these types of weddings. I think it is fine, if people want to do that. They are supporting the new couple, and the institution of marriage, and that wasn't such a bad thing in days gone by.

I think more weddings need to have cake and punch in the church rec hall. I'm totally disgusted at the 'show' that weddings have become. The obscene amount of money spent, the sometimes years of planning, the over the top stress and striving for perfection to the point half the family is angry with each other. All just for more than half of the marriages to end in divorce anyway. No thanks.

Well. if that's what you want ... cake and punch in the church rec hall ... that's fine, but sometimes people want something nicer, and there's nothing wrong with that. Large weddings do serve at least one purpose ... they stimulate the local economy!

While I guess a large, expensive wedding could be called a "Hollywood Production" ...... a low budget wedding with close to a thousand people (and many children) is definitely a "circus" !!

Circus is the perfect description for many of the, what you want to see as 'nicer' weddings. What makes a wedding 'nice' isn't the elaborate gowns, venues, years salary worth of flowers etc. it is when the couple is truly committed to each other, and to their higher power, and to making a new family with values, and commitment. And that can happen in a court house with a couple of witnesses or among a thousand friends.

You seem to equate the money spent with 'nice', and that is just so wrong. I certainly think the economy could stand the hit of less big showy expensive weddings in trade for real and committed marriages.

No, I DON'T equate money spent with "nice" ..... and if people would like (and can afford to) have an expensive wedding that certainly doesn't mean the marriage isn't "real and committed".

One does not preclude the other!

Responding to the underlined portion of your op on this. You did equate more with nicer.

[Tinkrbl44]

On 2/26/2015 mominohio said:

On 2/26/2015 Tinkrbl44 said:

On 2/26/2015 mominohio said:

On 2/26/2015 Tinkrbl44 said:

On 2/25/2015 mominohio said:

I will just reaffirm what others here have said, sometimes it is entire churches that are invited to these types of weddings. I think it is fine, if people want to do that. They are supporting the new couple, and the institution of marriage, and that wasn't such a bad thing in days gone by.

I think more weddings need to have cake and punch in the church rec hall. I'm totally disgusted at the 'show' that weddings have become. The obscene amount of money spent, the sometimes years of planning, the over the top stress and striving for perfection to the point half the family is angry with each other. All just for more than half of the marriages to end in divorce anyway. No thanks.

Well. if that's what you want ... cake and punch in the church rec hall ... that's fine, but sometimes people want something nicer, and there's nothing wrong with that. Large weddings do serve at least one purpose ... they stimulate the local economy!

While I guess a large, expensive wedding could be called a "Hollywood Production" ...... a low budget wedding with close to a thousand people (and many children) is definitely a "circus" !!

Circus is the perfect description for many of the, what you want to see as 'nicer' weddings. What makes a wedding 'nice' isn't the elaborate gowns, venues, years salary worth of flowers etc. it is when the couple is truly committed to each other, and to their higher power, and to making a new family with values, and commitment. And that can happen in a court house with a couple of witnesses or among a thousand friends.

You seem to equate the money spent with 'nice', and that is just so wrong. I certainly think the economy could stand the hit of less big showy expensive weddings in trade for real and committed marriages.

No, I DON'T equate money spent with "nice" ..... and if people would like (and can afford to) have an expensive wedding that certainly doesn't mean the marriage isn't "real and committed".

One does not preclude the other!

Responding to the underlined portion of your op on this. You did equate more with nicer.

I see that ..... and my point is brides get to choose what they want in a wedding, taking into consideration the budget constraints, of course.

Sometimes the parents want to have a big showy extravaganza ..... Joan Rivers spent over $1 million on Melissa's wedding and the marriage was over 3 years later .... but having spent less money on the wedding wouldn't have increased the chances for success, IMO.

Whether a bride feels more comfortable in a rec hall with 900 people , or wants something more elegant with only a dozen guests, (or whatever) ..... it is personal, and has no bearing on whether or not the marriage will go the distance.

[goodstuff]

The Duggars are a large family with many family connections, connections through a large church, and the connections they've made through JimBob's past political career, their experience speaking at Christian churches and conferences, and their TV show. I don't find it surprising at all that they'd want to include a large number of people in their weddings and receptions. Alcohol and even dancing are eschewed in many evangelical/fundamentalist churches, so wedding receptions are often simple cake, punch, and hors d'ouvres affairs in the church fellowship hall right after the wedding. Just a chance for friends to greet and congratulate the new couple and socialize with each other over a slice of wedding cake and a cup of fruit punch. That's the kind of reception DH and I had years ago, and it was very nice and what was expected in those circles. When your reception is less extravagant and less expensive, you can include more people!

[Marienkaefer2]

I think the wedding dress is beautiful, very elegant and Cinderella-like. I don't care how many people they invite to their wedding, or what they serve them. But to imply.that somehow they broadcast their lives for the betterment of tv entertainment is funny to me. They are exactly like the K family, except they are on the opposite end of the spectrum. People watch them because they are unusual, I would even.use the word strange. They are NOT like the average family. If they were, no one would watch. The Ks do.outrageous things like all of their sleazy antics, and people watch. The Ds have 100 kids (exaggeration) and portray themselves to the extreme in a "conservative" lifestyle, and people watch. Basically, both families are laughing all the way to.the bank. They are making money off their strange (to the average person) out of the norm family lifestyles. Nothing more nothing less. They've found a way to "cash in."