Re: Thanksgiving Rant

mousiegirl · ‎03-09-2010

@TenderMercies wrote:
I work for an organization that employs a lot of people who come to my city to do their job for short periods of time, then move on to other cities or return home. I currently have a dozen employees who are in town through the beginning of December. A long time member of my board of directors has invited these employees to her home for Thanksgiving dinner. I sent an email out to these employees to let them know about the invitation and to RSVP, so I can do a head count. At least 3 of these people responded saying things like, "I'm gluten free, so I'll need options" and "I'd like to request either a fish or vegetarian meal." Is it wrong that I'm angry about this? I can understand these requests if this were a working dinner on any normal day, but a dinner hosted by a board member on Thanksgiving? I don't want to be rude to them, but I feel like saying "It's Thanksgiving dinner, folks. You get turkey and the usual fixins. Accept it as it is, or make other plans." Can you believe the nerve of some people?

@TenderMercies You are right I would tell them something to this effect, "this is Thanksgiving dinner at a private home, not a restaurant where there is a varied menu, should I mark you as not attending?"

Sweetbay magnolia · ‎04-14-2013

Seems rather impolite.

Cogito ergo sum

deepwaterdotter · ‎03-09-2010

@summerwind wrote:
Agreed. My son is vegan, and never expects anyone to make concessions for him. We love him, and I have made adjustments where possible, but we still have meat etc. at family meals, and he brings something for himself, also.

Last year, I made a vegan pumpkin pie, and probably will again this year. It was actually pretty good. Looking for a vegan corn pudding/casserole recipe this year, might be a bit of a challenge.

If you google "vegan corn pudding casserole" you will see many offerings that qualify. As a non-vegan, I have to say that some of them look rather tasty.

Kitlynn · ‎03-09-2010

I would send a follow up email and let people know this is not a corporate hosted meal. It is an invitation for Thanksgiving dinner by a person who is opening up her home to offer them a holiday meal. If they want something special then they need to not come. When you are invited to dinner somewhere the host decides what they are cooking and you should just be grateful that you got invited. I think people can find something that works for them at a dinner and I also think for one meal you can eat what is offered unless you are highly allergic to some kind of food and if it is served just don't take any.

deepwaterdotter · ‎03-09-2010

My vegan niece always packs her own meal in case what is offered does not fit her diet. She says that it is more important to enjoy the fellowship of the dinner companions than to worry about the food.

AngusandBuddhasMom · ‎03-10-2010

@TenderMercies wrote:
@AngusandBuddhasMom wrote:
@TenderMercies wrote:
I work for an organization that employs a lot of people who come to my city to do their job for short periods of time, then move on to other cities or return home. I currently have a dozen employees who are in town through the beginning of December. A long time member of my board of directors has invited these employees to her home for Thanksgiving dinner. I sent an email out to these employees to let them know about the invitation and to RSVP, so I can do a head count. At least 3 of these people responded saying things like, "I'm gluten free, so I'll need options" and "I'd like to request either a fish or vegetarian meal." Is it wrong that I'm angry about this? I can understand these requests if this were a working dinner on any normal day, but a dinner hosted by a board member on Thanksgiving? I don't want to be rude to them, but I feel like saying "It's Thanksgiving dinner, folks. You get turkey and the usual fixins. Accept it as it is, or make other plans." Can you believe the nerve of some people?
Does the board member who is extending the invite know you have a problem with the responses you are getting? Maybe she is OK with knowing about the requests.

If you have a serious food allergy like Celiac or you are a vegan or pescatarian then the "usual thanksgiving" choices are not the same as you seem to think they are.
@AngusandBuddhasMom If you are a pescatarian or vegetarian, then you can eat stuffing, mashed potatoes, salad, vegetables, etc. If you are gluten free, you can eat turkey, mashed potatoes, salad, vegetables, etc. I am not asking a board member to make special meals for these people when there will already be plenty of options.

If people have certain dietary restrictions then maybe they were asking because they don't want to accept and then find out they can't eat certain things.

My DD has celiac I know she is used to doing with out and not asking. People seem confused as to what is and isn't allowed. Some people are more bold then others I see no reason to take offense.

For religious reasons we don't eat pork or any meat on Fridays. I never say anything if out or at a company function. I just look to see what I can have and make do. No big deal. That said when people notice they make a big deal about it and seem to take a personal offense to it. I don't know how my abstaining from certain foods reflects on them but apparently it does.

DREAMON · ‎03-09-2010

I have a family member who has food allergies and she never turns down invitations....she responds saying that she would love to come but will provide her own food due to her allergies. It has never been a problem and the hosts appreciate her honesty and her company.

AngusandBuddhasMom · ‎03-10-2010

@Moonchilde wrote:
@AngusandBuddhasMom wrote:
@TenderMercies wrote:
I work for an organization that employs a lot of people who come to my city to do their job for short periods of time, then move on to other cities or return home. I currently have a dozen employees who are in town through the beginning of December. A long time member of my board of directors has invited these employees to her home for Thanksgiving dinner. I sent an email out to these employees to let them know about the invitation and to RSVP, so I can do a head count. At least 3 of these people responded saying things like, "I'm gluten free, so I'll need options" and "I'd like to request either a fish or vegetarian meal." Is it wrong that I'm angry about this? I can understand these requests if this were a working dinner on any normal day, but a dinner hosted by a board member on Thanksgiving? I don't want to be rude to them, but I feel like saying "It's Thanksgiving dinner, folks. You get turkey and the usual fixins. Accept it as it is, or make other plans." Can you believe the nerve of some people?
Does the board member who is extending the invite know you have a problem with the responses you are getting? Maybe she is OK with knowing about the requests.

If you have a serious food allergy like Celiac or you are a vegan or pescatarian then the "usual thanksgiving" choices are not the same as you seem to think they are.

I think the point is, on Turkey Day it’s turkey on the menu, and come or don’t come, no catering to every diet/lifestyle choice when you’re being invited to someone’s home you don’t even/barely know, as an unnecessary courtesy the host is extending.

There are allergies that have become trendy to have, and vegan or whatever is a choice. Everyone doesn’t need to honor every choice every individual thinks they need to make. Throw out ultimatums and sit in a hotel bar on Thursday.

Celiac is not a trendy thing.

Imaoldhippie · ‎06-10-2015

I think it is the heighth of rudeness. It is a free dinner after all. I would email the folks back and state that it is a traditional Thanksgiving dinner. No special provisions provided.

LIFE IS TO SHORT TOO FOLD FITTED SHEETS