Re: Thanksgiving Dinner charges?

SloopJohnB · ‎04-25-2020

Even as a child I can remember my parents always preparing a big feast and would invite our relatives. There was an elderly neighbor couple who my mom always included, as they had no other place to go. Thanksgiving should be a time of, well giving thanks LOL, and sharing our bounty.

It should be about passing the sweet potatoes, not passing the hat. 🍠🎩

I would give everything I own just to have you back again.......David Gates of Bread

Hoovermom · ‎03-19-2010

Personally I would not go since I could not get over the $50 "charge" for dinner. It would show on my face. These people would not become part of my inner circle even though they went to the same church. I would politely decline and politely say hello at church.

ETA: DH is also the outgoing one of us and would never decline an invitation either. BUT he would change his mind if it made me uncomfortable. This would do it.

gidgetgh · ‎03-09-2010

And people wondered why I stayed home last year and had a grilled cheese sandwich, a piece of cheesecake and watched Hallmark movies.

No angst over a meal. It's just one meal out of 365 days. I just don't understand all the hoopla.

Why is it, when I have a 50/50 guess at something, I'm always 100% wrong?

ECBG · ‎01-08-2011

Poor form indeed.

I would call and say you can't come. Don't elaborate on a reason, none is needed. That cost you can get a whole turkey dinner and have leftovers!

nyc1 · ‎03-19-2010

@Duckncover There is NO WAY I would go. If you are uncomfortable telling them the true reason, you can always say you want a home cooked meal and not one from a restaurant.

However... I am appalled. It's THEIR choice to bring in rather than cook. That's on them. If they cooked but purchased a cake, would they charge you for half of the cake? NO they would not.

It's not like the four of you discussed splitting the cost of purchasing from a restaurant and one of you hosting. This was an outright invitation, and whether the food comes from their kitchen or the kitchen of a restaurant, the invitation should be with no charges attached.

I would absolutely not go.

Keep us posted.

bells4me · ‎03-13-2010

Never heard of anything so rude. I foresee an emergency coming up .

Vivian · ‎03-11-2010

I haven't read all the replies but here are my thoughts. First, that invitation is tacky. I would cancel. If you don't want to cook, find a local restaurant and go there to be served and to get exactly what you want. This is the first time in 20 years that I'm having Thanksgiving at home because my grandson is cooking it. I told my husband to tell him it's delicious even if it isn't.

Many years ago my husband and I, plus another prof and his wife, were invited to dinner by one of their students and his parents. We happily accepted but I brought a credit card just in case. Sure enough, we were handed a check, as the other couple was. That taught me a lesson, so when my son-in-law's wealthy cousin invited us to dinner, we were prepared. Yes, despite the cousin giving us no acknowledgement of payment (all we got was an invitation to dinner), we got the hefty bill and paid for my daughter and her family too. My son-in-law was so embarrassed that he insisted on taking us out to dinner that week. Good news...he paid.

Sage04 · ‎07-10-2011

Here is what happened (Mr Monk).

Wife #1 and husband #1 discussed plans for Thansgiving dinner. Decided to order from a restaurant. Wife asked husband to make the call and find out if they are interested (she should have made the call). Anyway, both husbands talked for about 10-15 minutes about everything and anything, so before they hang up, husband #1 said, "by the way, my wife and I would like to invite you and your wife for Thanksgiving dinner". Husband #2 accepts because he likes the couple.

Wife #1 found out that her husband didn't give all the information so she called up @Duckncover and told her the plans.

I see nothing wrong with "going in" on the meal together. Saves everyone from cooking. It's like going to a restaurant and paying for your meal except it would be done at a home where you can relax and talk.

@Duckncover said her husband likes the couple. She didn't say "we like the couple". That could be the problem.

I would like to hear what the husband thinks about paying but so far we haven't heard from @Duckncover . Maybe she's busy and will come back later.

The husband already accepted the invite, so I hope they go.

Lipstickdiva · ‎03-10-2010

@Sooner wrote:
I think it is rude to expect people to pay for a dinner at a wedding. Since when does one have to have a meal to have a wedding?

Get married in the afternoon, serve cake and punch and be done with it. To expect guests to fork over for your fancy wedding you can't afford is seriously tacky to me.

@Sooner , but how many times have posters said the value of the gift they give is in line with the cost of the wedding reception? So if someone has their reception as a country club, they get a bigger gift than if their reception were at the local VFW hall.

This Thanksgiving invite is no different than people having a cash bar at their wedding though.

Sage04 · ‎07-10-2011

@Vivian wrote:
I haven't read all the replies but here are my thoughts. First, that invitation is tacky. I would cancel. If you don't want to cook, find a local restaurant and go there to be served and to get exactly what you want. This is the first time in 20 years that I'm having Thanksgiving at home because my grandson is cooking it. I told my husband to tell him it's delicious even if it isn't.

Many years ago my husband and I, plus another prof and his wife, were invited to dinner by one of their students and his parents. We happily accepted but I brought a credit card just in case. Sure enough, we were handed a check, as the other couple was. That taught me a lesson, so when my son-in-law's wealthy cousin invited us to dinner, we were prepared. Yes, despite the cousin giving us no acknowledgement of payment (all we got was an invitation to dinner), we got the hefty bill and paid for my daughter and her family too. My son-in-law was so embarrassed that he insisted on taking us out to dinner that week. Good news...he paid.

@Vivian oh my goodness. Was this at a restaurant? If so, I can see this happening.

If it was a home cooked meal and you didn't have the cash would you have had to do the dishes?