Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 6,672
Registered: ‎03-10-2010


1.   Better days are coming.  They are called Saturday and Sunday.


2.  This too shall pass.  It won't pass like a kidney stone, but it will pass.


3.  If you were able to believe in Santa Claus for like 8 years, you can believe in yourself like, 5 minutes.


4.   If you don't like where you are, move.  You are not a tree.


5.   If you aren't in over your head, how do you know how tall you are?


6.   When you feel worthless, remember you were once the quickest sperm cell.


7.   Never look backwards or you'll fall down the stairs.


8.   When life gives you lemons, squirt someone in the eye.


9.   After Tuesday, even the calendar goes What The....


10.   If you keep your feet planted firmly on the ground, you'll have trouble putting on your pants.


11.   Why be moody when you can shake your booty.


12.  People who would wonder whether the glass is half empty or half full are missing the point.  The glass is refillable.


13.   When something goes wrong in your life just yell "plot twist" and move on.


The moving finger writes; And having writ, Moves on: nor all your Piety nor Wit Shall lure it back to cancel half a Line Nor all your Tears Wash out a Word of it. Omar Khayam