TAKING LICENSE AWAY FROM ELDERLY PARENT - Page 8

september · ‎03-09-2010

The Santa Monica tragedy might have seemed like "not an accident"... But was the driver evaluated for dementia? It was a while back, so I don't remember.

I don't see see how someone suffering from dementia can be charged with manslaughter. Their brains aren't capable of making rational choices. It's too bad his family members didn't stop him from driving before something like this happened...which brings us full circle to the subject of this thread

Tinkrbl44 · ‎08-23-2010

You're going to need to take away the KEYS and the car .... many older people continue to drive without licenses until they get caught ..... or hurt someone.

Get the person's physician involved.

maggishops · ‎06-30-2010

Good luck! At age 90, in FL, elderly drivers are tested, etc. My Dad didn't pass ,even after 3 times taking the driving test. his reflexes weren't good. BUT he still had a car and was so stubborn, that he kept driving, no matter what we did.

FL also has a dept. where one can anonymously report a bad driver. I did this, and requested to be anonymous. They came, interviewed him, he told them yes, he was still driving, when they called me, I asked what they could do, and they said nothing.... ummmmm why do they even have this dept???

On my next visit, I found his insurance card/ statement/bill, etc. when I got home, I wrote them, telling them to verify that he didn't have a drivers license and to cancel his policy, and to PLEASE keep this confidential.

About 10 days later, he called me, saying he got a letter from his insurance, and said they took his car away from him, cancelling his policy. Can I come down and get it.... I was there in 2 days and drove it back home and sold it. He lived 5 more years and never knew what had happened there. But he was always trying to find ways to get around. Never mind, the senior living home he was in had a car, van and shuttle that would take him wherever he needed to go, but he really hated it.

Good luck!! Hopefully she isn't as stubborn and as hard headed as my Dad was.

mustang66lady · ‎03-10-2010

@Shanus

I have not read this entire thread so apologize if I am repeating anything. I live in IL and worked as a nurse in a rather large doctor's group for almost 30 years. A doctor cannot take a license away from a driver BUT the doctor can write a letter to the Secretary of State recommending the license to be revoked because of the patient's health status. In all the years I worked in the office, we NEVER had the Secretary of State refuse to issue a letter of revocation. Getting the doctor involved will not be an immediate solution but will have significant impact on the situation. Best wishes and thoughts in what you are facing. As stated before, you have to become the parent to the parent and that is an extremely heart tugging situation to be in.

Moonchilde · ‎05-23-2010

@september wrote:
The Santa Monica tragedy might have seemed like "not an accident"... But was the driver evaluated for dementia? It was a while back, so I don't remember.

I don't see see how someone suffering from dementia can be charged with manslaughter. Their brains aren't capable of making rational choices. It's too bad his family members didn't stop him from driving before something like this happened...which brings us full circle to the subject of this thread

At the time, he was evaluated six days from Sunday in every way possible. Although he clearly had *some* kind of mental issue, there is no mention of dementia as contributory in relation to the trial, the charges or the verdict.

If you read the article, video was found of him having a very similar accident ten years prior to that one.

"The day of the tragedy in Santa Monica, footage of a previous crash Weller had been in ten years earlier surfaced. While that crash was not fatal, he had driven his car off the road in much the same fashion as the Promenade crash and the footage was nearly identical in that it showed a confused Weller wandering around his crashed car in a heavily populated, public area. This further sparked debate surrounding what warning signs authorities should examine when dealing with driving privileges and the elderly."

It's my personal opinion, based on living in the middle of it as it occurred and as the trial was going on (some of the victims were brought to my place of employment, I was working the day it happened), and hearing eyewitness testimony, that the man had mental issues, but not necessarily age-related, i.e. a psychosis rather than a dementia or in addition to some cognitive impairment. There was a reason he did what he did, but IMO it may not have had to do solely with age. It sounds like the DA and the judge felt similarly because he was charged, tried, and convicted and there were no reversals.

I'm not intending to invalidate the issue of the very elderly not being safe drivers - I agree that more watching, evaluating, and removal of keys etc should be ongoing. I;m just saying that in this particular instance there was more going on than simple Alzheimers or senile dementia - and the fact that he was brought to trial at all, and then convicted on all counts, tells me that the judicial system validated my POV.

Life without Mexican food is no life at all

Moonchilde · ‎05-23-2010

@Tinkrbl44 wrote:
You're going to need to take away the keys and the car .... many older people continue to drive without licenses until they get caught ..... or hurt someone.

Get the person's physician involved.

Yes, this. Many people of all ages pay no attention to not having a valid D/L and will keep on driving as long as they have a car that's running.

Life without Mexican food is no life at all

Shorty2U · ‎03-09-2010

My dad died 6&1/2 yrs ago. And well, we had to take my dads keys away when he was 78. After he retired (at 77) his legs were bad and he was hospitalized and could no longer drive when he got out of the hospital.

Well we just told him nicely, and told him we would be driving him and helping him so he wouldn't worry. It was very hard. As a matter of fact, he would go sit in his car for months afterwards (until we eventually got rid of his car). It was sad when he would sit in the car, but we had to stick by it for his safety.

PS Cheerish every moment with your dear mom. I miss my parents terribly to this day. My mom died at age 51, and dad died at 84.

And in the end, the love you take is equal to the love you make~ The Beatles

hckynut · ‎03-10-2010

@mustang66lady wrote:
@Shanus
I have not read this entire thread so apologize if I am repeating anything. I live in IL and worked as a nurse in a rather large doctor's group for almost 30 years.

A doctor cannot take a license away from a driver BUT the doctor can write a letter to the Secretary of State recommending the license to be revoked because of the patient's health status. In all the years I worked in the office, we NEVER had the Secretary of State refuse to issue a letter of revocation.

Getting the doctor involved will not be an immediate solution but will have significant impact on the situation. Best wishes and thoughts in what you are facing. As stated before, you have to become the parent to the parent and that is an extremely heart tugging situation to be in.

hckynut(john)

SunValley · ‎04-19-2010

@occasionalrain wrote:
Every day people are in accidents, less than 1% are the elderly. Most are distracted drivers, on their cell phones, dealing with their misbehaving children, putting on makeup, or over tired and falling asleep. My guess is that your mother isn't out on the highway but just short drives around town during the day. Any accident will be minor not the doom imagined by some.

My elderly mother was involved in 3 accidents, all on short drives, not on the highway. It doesn't have to be a highway to hit someone or injure yourself. She would not listen to me. What is really crazy is that she hated driving and knew she did not understand the traffic signals with protected turns. If she was first in line at a stop light, she would simply sit at the light till someone honked and then would turn or move forward. My brother and I finally just took the keys. I told her it was that or we would insist she pass a driving test. It was a bad day and she was very resentful for a long time, but she got over it. I feel for you. It's tough love.

Kachina624 · ‎03-10-2010

@Snowpuppy wrote:
Most states have a process to retest drivers when requested.

Contact your Motor Vehicles Division in her state. She wll have to retest.

They will take her license and never tell her who asked to be retested.

They will take her license only if she fails the vision test or her doctor advises them she's not fit to drive. I've never heard of someone being retested in old age.

New Mexico☀️Land Of Enchantment