So What Happens after YOU die? - Page 7

Piperdellilah · ‎02-12-2015

@fourpaws56 what is it with dads? My dad has pretty much said that as well! He wants no service, no obit, nothing. just cremation.

for me personally, i just want to be cremated, no service. Same goes for my husband.

chrystaltree · ‎05-10-2010

I'm only 58 and I don't have any fatal illnesses so I haven't made funeral plans. We are well insured and my husband and my daughters know that I do not one a "big fuss" made over me after I pass. I don't want them to spend a lot of money on a funeral. I want to be cremated. I want a memorial service that is a celebration of my life. The planning is up to them. Of coures we have a will.

151949 · ‎03-09-2010

I have a good friend who is 86 years old. She is a widow but she lived with her significent other for 17 years and he recently died. He owned their condo and left it to his 7 children , so she is at their mercy to have a place to live. Should they decide they want her out she won't have a leg to stand on.She says if they do kick her out she's going to go to the very nicest assisted living place she can find, because at 86 she deserves to be waited on a little. I agree. However, so far - though it has only been a few months since he died - they have not mentioned to her anything about her needing to move.

151949 · ‎03-09-2010

I was very fortunate that my parents totally planned and paid for their funerals before they died. I knew it was all exactly as they wanted it, because they planned it. Just a typical example of how thoughtful they always were, right to the final detail of their lives.

Lipstickdiva · ‎03-10-2010

I have nothing done at all. And the sad thing is, I am a paralegal at a firm that does a lot of probate and estate planning.

homedecor1 · ‎03-09-2010

It seems I've been pretty focused on this stage of life lately. Seeing so many people passing away this past 3 months has been a eye-opener. Plus, living in a older over 55 community certainly makes you think about the next phase of life. Being so far away from my children & GD has made me realize life can end at any minute.

While recently in NJ I sat down with the boys and went over all my directives. They were both in agreement their father can live here (if I go first) - but the home is to be sold upon his death. Neither wants it or the cost of moving the contents. I suggested they sell the house with the contents as its common here.

I don't have any ties to this house its just a place to live comfortably. I have few acquantainces here and my family ties are up north.

I gift both my boys every year so they are happily using part of their inheritance while I'm alive and I enjoy seeing them enjoy it.

I don't want it to be like the other people who die here. dear lord, the person dies and within a week everything at the curb, estate sales and for sale sign on house. I guess its the way of life!

Piperdellilah · ‎02-12-2015

@151949 wrote:
I was very fortunate that my parents totally planned and paid for their funerals before they died. I knew it was all exactly as they wanted it, because they planned it. Just a typical example of how thoughtful they always were, right to the final detail of their lives.

My mom did the same exact thing, down to the picture of her she wanted displayed. It made things a lot easier because I knew what she wanted. She was also very thoughtful.

aprilskies · ‎03-09-2010

I dont have a thing done or marked out. I keep meaning to do it because no one will know what to do. It would be a hassle and headache for people to figure out. I do need to put it on my list of things to do.

It has been interesting to read how many people dont want a service, etc. Me either.

chlema · ‎05-22-2010

It's been less than a month since my DH passed after being in hospice care for 2 months. His wishes were very clear, no viewing please, don't want people passing by my body remarking how good or bad I look. He wanted to be cremated and said have a gathering in the home to celebrate my life and put a can of beer by my ashes.

So that's exactly what we did but added an apple next to the can because 2 days before he died he told me he would see me later - under the apple tree. (we do not have an apple tree in our yard). It was a very nice gathering, just family and friends paying tribute to a nice, kind man.

As for paperwork, everything is in both names so very little for me to do other than the obvious.

Mom2Dogs · ‎03-09-2010

@chlema, I am sorry for your loss.....my best girl friend lost her husband late last year.....unexpectedly at 65 years old. She did the day of viewing along with a long day of more viewing and then service, cemetery and large meal afterward....she was exhausted.

The tribute to your husband sounds just right.