Reply
Respected Contributor
Posts: 3,243
Registered: ‎04-30-2012

Should he Stay or Should he go ?

I'm a very happy girl @ 66 yrs old, retired and financially stable, own my home. I have been dating a 62 year old man exclusively for a little over 1 yr and he is also retired and financially stable. We are very happy, never argue, he treats me very very well, takes me to dinner (I also cook), we go bowling, he surprises me with roses, he's never late, stays fit and keeps his word all the time.  When I met him, I told him I was looking for someone to build a great relationship with and eventually wanted to get married.  Later in the relationship he told me he never wants to get married again. We love each other very much but since we have different goals I'm thinking about ending the relationship and moving on until I find what I am looking for because at my age, no need to waste my time. What would you do ???

Honored Contributor
Posts: 10,439
Registered: ‎05-15-2016

Re: Should he Stay or Should he go ?

Do you know why he is opposed to marrying again? 

Honored Contributor
Posts: 20,143
Registered: ‎04-18-2012

Re: Should he Stay or Should he go ?

It depends on how important the piece of paper is to you. 

Don't Change Your Authenticity for Approval
Valued Contributor
Posts: 645
Registered: ‎03-13-2010

Re: Should he Stay or Should he go ?

I would go with my gut feeling and move on. Hope some day you will find someone who wants to make the commitment and marry. If your current love has told you he does not want to get married, he has made his feelings clear so .....move on.

Respected Contributor
Posts: 3,707
Registered: ‎03-11-2010

Re: Should he Stay or Should he go ?

What will marriage give you that you don't already have?  He sounds like a keeper to me. Marriage is only a piece of paper.

Respected Contributor
Posts: 3,243
Registered: ‎04-30-2012

Re: Should he Stay or Should he go ?

Bonanzajellybean wrote:

Do you know why he is opposed to marrying again? 

 
His previous marriage ended badly, previous wife ran up bills. But again, I am not that  type and he knows that. I have never asked him to pay any of my bills. We are pretty much on the same level which is good.
Respected Contributor
Posts: 4,381
Registered: ‎04-04-2015

Re: Should he Stay or Should he go ?

I could be very wrong here, but if you "love him very much" and are happy in the relationship, it sounds like your leaving would really be giving him an ultimatum in hopes that he would change his mind and marry you.

 

If that is the case, just be prepared for the possibility that he will let you go.

Honored Contributor
Posts: 35,804
Registered: ‎05-22-2016

Re: Should he Stay or Should he go ?

At your fine age of 66, why would getting married be such a deal breaker for you? Honestly, maybe if you were twenty or more years younger then I can see why it would be an important thing. But  at 66...??

Honored Contributor
Posts: 37,857
Registered: ‎06-11-2011

Re: Should he Stay or Should he go ?


@Trudey wrote:

What will marriage give you that you don't already have?  He sounds like a keeper to me. Marriage is only a piece of paper.


@Trudey  Does your husband know this is what you think?  LOL Smiley Happy

 

(by the way I agree with you)

Respected Contributor
Posts: 4,381
Registered: ‎04-04-2015

Re: Should he Stay or Should he go ?


@Goodie2shoes wrote:

@Bonanzajellybean wrote:

Do you know why he is opposed to marrying again? 

 
His previous marriage ended badly, previous wife ran up bills. But again, I am not that  type and he knows that. I have never asked him to pay any of my bills. We are pretty much on the same level which is good.

Does he have kids?  If so, he could be concerned about complicating his finances and creating a problem when he dies.  Yes, there are wills and trusts - and people sue each other over them all the time.